


Livin' on the Edge

by Clarinda0110, D_Toska



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Stripper/Exotic Dancer, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Boys Kissing, Fist Fights, Flashdance AU, M/M, Mild Language, Oral Sex, Panic Attacks, Referenced Death/Car Accident, Songfic, Tags Are Hard
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-08
Updated: 2018-03-01
Packaged: 2019-02-12 04:07:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 54,778
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12950955
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Clarinda0110/pseuds/Clarinda0110, https://archiveofourown.org/users/D_Toska/pseuds/D_Toska
Summary: Yuuri Katsuki is an unassumingly handsome young man who works a day job in a steel mill and dances in a bar at night. When Yuuri discovers that his handsome boss, Viktor Nikiforov, is both interested in him and supportive of his performing career, he renews his efforts to get accepted into a prestigious dance conservatory. Although Yuuri is frightened of failure, he is cheered on by Viktor, as well as by his mentor, former ballet performer/teacher Minako Okukawa.





	1. Give Me the Thing I Love

    _I live for the applause, applause, applause_  
_I live for the applause-plause, live for the applause-plause_  
_Live for the way that you cheer and scream for me_  
_The applause, applause, applause_

_-Applause by Lady Gaga_

It was hot. So very hot. Even with the industrial fans to circulate the air, the welding shop was always as hot as the six shades of hell. It wasn’t just the heat from the torches that made it so hot, it was the all the gear on top of their street clothes. The flame retardant jackets that kept him from catching on fire from stray sparks. His thick leather gloves that kept his flesh from getting 3rd-degree burns. Sweat trickled down Yuuri Katsuki's neck as he flipped up his blue welder’s helmet to wipe the sweat that was threatening to blur his vision. His glasses didn’t help so much either. They were always getting smudged or fogging up. He needed to order some contacts for both of his jobs. When he can afford them. 

Glancing up at the clock, he sighed. “3:50," Yuuri mumbled to himself. Almost quitting time. He sighed again, breathing in the scent of burning metal then flipped his helmet back down and put the tip of his torch back to his task. Smoke lightning snapped inside a blue cloud billowing about a shattering burst of yellow sparks bouncing into his face as he painted smooth lines of liquid steel. 

The shriek of the whistle signaled the end of the second shift. Yuuri put down his torch and removed his helmet. Placing it under his arm, he headed for the locker room. 

“Hey, Katsuki!” His tiny, blonde shift manager called out as he flicked a hand up at him. 

“Hey, Yurio. What’s up?” 

“Hey! I told you not to call me that here! Only at the bar.” He glanced around at the guys who liked to gripe behind his back about him being picked for the manager’s job only by reason of his name and relation to the owner. “Nikiforov’s playing favorites; that whelp can't even wipe his own ass! What does he know about running a tight ship?” was heard behind every steel beam holding this place up. It was an unfair charge to level at him. Yurio was deep down a good guy and smarter than most of the guys on his shift, having been practically raised in the shop.

“Sorry, it slipped. You coming tonight?”

“Yeah, man. Are you gonna…”

Yurio’s voice trailed off as a flash of silver stole his attention and turned it to the man striding across the floor responsible for keeping him in a job. Viktor Nikiforov. Heir to the throne of the mill that the Nikiforov family had kept running even as the iron belt, Detroit in particular, slowly rusted. Despite the struggle around them, the shop now kept three shifts of welders and steelworkers in jobs. Yuuri was grateful for the steady income that it provided, even if it was, for the most part, soul-sucking work. Viktor was a pillar of the community, donating money for inner city charities and serving on the boards of several art committees. 

Viktor always made it a point to personally welcome each new employee and thus had shook his hand on his first day. He had been star-struck and had blushed terribly when his eyes met Viktor's deep ocean blue eyes. He prayed his hand hadn't been too sweaty as he gripped his new boss’ hand. The warmth of Viktor's hand had lingered on Yuuri's as it dropped to his side and Viktor moved on to shake the hand of the next new employee. Whenever Viktor was on the floor, which was often, Yuuri's eyes would follow the silver-haired man. Once, when Victor had come to check on his output, Yuuri had almost burnt the man he was so flustered by his presence. Viktor had only smiled and winked, telling him to be more careful. Yuuri had wished the ground would've opened up and swallowed him on the spot. 

“Oi! Katsuki! You alive in there?”

“Huh?” Yuuri’s eyes flicked between Yurio staring at him with annoyance and the retreating figure at the other end of the shop before settling back on Yurio. “Oh. Sorry. I guess I spaced out.”

“Yeah, yeah. Spaced out my ass. You’ve got a thing for my uncle.”

“What?! No, I don’t! What would make you think that?!”

“That damn blush on your face every time he comes in.” He rolled his eyes.

“I don’t blush!” As he said the words, the very blush he was trying to deny heated on his face.

Yurio sniggered. “Yeah, whatever, man. I’ll see ya tonight.”

“Y-yeah. See ya.” 

The cool autumn air hit Yuuri full in the face as he picked up speed and jogged out of the parking lot, heading towards home. He could have taken the bus but has always been prone to putting on the pounds so he usually jogged to and from work. As he rounded the corner, his building came into view a few blocks ahead. It was a relic from Detroit's heyday, a hulking warehouse that had been turned into studio apartments. The neighborhood wasn't the greatest, so the rent was cheap. Yuuri bounced up the five flights of stairs instead of taking the freight elevator up and headed to his apartment.

The small scratch of claws on the hardwood floor greeted Yuuri as he unlocked his door. Vicchan yipped and circled him as he put his keys and phone on the kitchen counter. “Who’s a good boy?” he cooed as he ruffled the tiny poodle’s fur. Vicchan was the only extra expense that he allowed himself. Having someone to come home to every day was truly a blessing.

Not wanting to waste any more time, he stripped as headed toward the bathroom and promised to pick up after the show was over. Blasting the hot water, he scrubbed the sweat and grime of the shop from his hair and body. Feeling practically reborn, he toweled himself dry and dressed in comfortable clothes before heading to Yutopia. Glancing at his phone to check the time, he noticed a text from Phichit.

 

Best Bro-Hey cutie! Ready to shake your money maker?

Omw!-Yuuri

Best Bro-See you soon!

 

Smiling to himself, Yuuri locked up and headed downstairs, his body and spirit already feeling lighter, in spite of his long work day. Dancing at the club was the best part of his week. It was so freeing to be on stage and losing himself in the music. To him, it wasn't being sexy on stage, though all his friends insisted he was. It was the only outlet for his creativity as he picked out each song and choreographed the dance to tell the story he wanted to tell. Dancing was the only thing that fed his soul.

 _All you sinners stand up, sing hallelujah (hallelujah)_  
_Show praise with your body Stand up, sing hallelujah (hallelujah)_  
_And if you can’t stop shaking, lean back Let it move right through ya (hallelujah!)_  
_Say your prayers Say your prayers Say your prayers Hallelujah!_

_-Hallelujah! Panic! at the Disco_

The sound of clinking glassware and the greasy smell of burgers assaulted Yuuri's senses when he opened the door to Yutopia. The crowd was already getting thick, so he had to squeeze through to make it to the back of the bar. 

"Hey, baby bro!" Mari greeted as he stowed his belongings beside the register. "How was work in the sweatshop? Did you see the golden boy?" she teased with her rag swiping over the counters of the bar she tended. 

Yuuri blushed.”I gotta head back!” 

Mari sniggered at his non-answer.

"Yuuuuri!" Phichit hollered over the din of the crowd. “Gabatte!"

Phichit was currently weaving his way between the tables. His graceful movements and the five plates balanced on his arms was telling of, not only years of experience as a waiter, but his years of training as a figure skater. Since grade school, he had been obsessed with the movie, "The King and the Skater". He wanted to be the first skater of Thai heritage to skate to the theme song. Unfortunately, the cost of rink time and coaches was steep and he could only train part-time at best. But Phichit had such a sunny outlook Yuuri was sure that if anyone would make it out of Detroit, it would be him.

"Yuuri, you're on in fifteen!" Minako shouted at him as he passed her on the way to his dressing room. “Go make yourself extra pretty tonight. Business has been a little slow and pretty dancers put more butts in seats-"

"- than cheap liquor does. Yeah, yeah. I got it. I'll blow them an extra kiss tonight."

"That's my prettiest dancer." Minako, the hyper, always twirling former dance instructor responsible for keeping him out of trouble on the streets of Detroit and dreaming of a future in dance inside the safety of her little dance studio, ruffled his hair as he walked past. He owed her a lot even though his dreams of dancing his way out of here were now extinct. He ducked out of her affectionate grasp with a smile.  

Dressing room would be a generous term for this storage room with a lighted mirror and vanity, but it was enough. Shucking his street clothes, he pulled on his glittering fishnet tights and a pair of black booty shorts. The top was half mesh, half slick satin spandex with crystals across the shoulder down to his waist with sleeves in the same shimmering mesh as his tights. A black half skirt lined with red finished the outfit. It was designed to suggest both male and female aspects. Taking the gel, he slicked back his black hair through a few strands refused to stay in place. Lining his deep brown eyes with a kohl black pencil, glossing up his slightly chapped lips, and dusting his exposed skin with shimmer powder, he was ready. He loved the power he felt when he was dressed for stage and he practically pulsed with excitement as the opening beats of his song began.

"Welcome to Yutopia's very own burlesque show! Home of the finest, sexiest dancers you’ve ever seen!" Minako’s voice thundered through the speakers over the roaring applause of the audience. "Now, the one you've all come to see, Detroit's own God of Love, Eros!"

 _I live for the applause, applause, applause_  
_I live_ for _the applause-_ plause _, live for the applause-_ plause  
_Live for the way that you cheer and scream for me_  
_The applause, applause, applause_

Yuuri's silhouette was projected on a white screen as he began to dance. The crowd whistled and clapped along with the pounding beat of the song. He danced and spun his way across the stage and finally emerged from behind the screen as the chorus crescendoed.

 _Give me that thing I love (I'll turn the lights out)_  
_Put your hands up, make 'em touch, touch (Make it real loud)_  
_Give me that thing I love (I'll turn the lights out)_  
_Put your hands up, make 'me touch (Make it real loud)_

A chair had been placed center stage with a chain dangling from the ceiling. Yuuri spun around and bent back into a graceful back bend then flipped his legs into a spread eagle above his head. He placed his feet back on the ground and slid into the chair.

 _Make it real loud (A-P-P-L-A-U-S-E)_  
_Put your hands up, make 'em touch, touch (A-P-P-L-A-U-S-E)_  
_Make it real loud (A-P-P-L-A-U-S-E)_  
_Put your hands up, make 'em touch, touch (A-P-P-L-A-U-S-E)_

The song was reaching its climax, it was time for his finale. He reached up to the chain, with a good tug, the water that was rigged in the lights splashed down onto him. He arched his back and stretched his long legs out as the water streamed through his hair and down his body. He sprung from the chair and whipped his wet hair towards the audience as he strutted down the stage. He spun and then collapsed down to his knees at the end of the stage. He pounded his fists to the beat of the chorus like a man possessed. Finally achieving the release that only the dance and music has been able to give him.

 _I live for the applause, applause, applause_  
_I live_ for _the applause-_ plause _, live for the applause-_ plause  
_Live for the way that you cheer and scream for me_  
_The applause, applause, applause_  
_Give me that thing I love (I'll turn the lights out)_  
_Put your hands up, make 'em touch, touch (Make it real loud)_  
_Give me that thing I love (I'll turn the lights out)_  
_Put your hands up, make 'me touch (Make it real loud)_  
_Make it real loud (A-P-P-L-A-U-S-E)_  
_Put your hands up, make 'em touch, touch (A-P-P-L-A-U-S-E)_  
_Make it real loud (A-P-P-L-A-U-S-E)_  
_Put your hands up, make 'em touch, touch (A-P-P-L-A-U-S-E)_

_***********_


	2. We push and pull like a magnet do

_I’m in love with the shape of you_  
_we push and pull like a magnet do_  
_although my heart is falling too_  
_I’m in the love with your body_

_-Shape of You by Ed Sheeran_

To say that Viktor Nikiforov had everything was mostly true. He was handsome, smart, and wealthy. Inheriting the ownership of a steel mill wasn’t the most glamorous job, but Viktor loved it with every fiber of his being. It wasn’t just that he’d been raised to do it, learning every aspect of the shop as well as the business side and marketing. It was the simple pleasure that comes from making something from nothing. Taking the raw materials and crafting them into something useful, something beautiful. He’d learned from his father and uncle that it was important to value not only the product that they made but the people who crafted it. Viktor spent a great deal of his working day on the floor of the shop.  

“It shows that you’re a human being, flesh and bones, not just some hot shot boss that hides away in his cushy office,” his father had insisted. Whether it was going over timelines for production or checking on the quality of work from a single employee, Viktor was hands on. He wasn’t afraid of rolling up his sleeves and showing a new apprentice how to weld a clean line or going over shift output with each super. These actions produced not only a great product but made his employees fiercely loyal to him.

The flaw in Viktor’s life was a personal level. While having good relationships with his employees came easily to him, having a good relationship with a partner was a struggle. So much of his life and love was consumed by the shop, anyone outside that was going come in second.

When he formally took control of the shop, he had married a beautiful woman, Anya. His father had, for all intents and purposes, pushed her at him. Anya was wealthy in her own right and had connections in the city that would benefit the shop in many ways. She was used to being the center of everything: parties, committees, and in her personal relationships. So, when Anya married him, she expected him to put her whims and needs first. She soon discovered that Viktor’s attention was already consumed. After a year of private and public fights, both having a flair for the dramatics, they agreed to divorce. Viktor’s only demand was that she wouldn’t get any part of the shop to which Anya readily agreed. She had no wish to have anything to do with the place that had ruined her marriage.

Now seven years later, he was still married to his job and the only long-term companion he had was Makkachin, his standard poodle. The only human that tolerated his company on a regular basis was his nephew, Yuri Plisetsky. The feisty kitten would on occasion come over to Viktor’s apartment for meals and would drag him out for drinks.

“Oi, old man! Take me out to dinner tonight! It’s Friday, and I deserve it for putting up with everyone’s shit all week. Yours especially.” Yuri leaned back in his chair and kicked his feet up on Viktor’s desk. Second shift had just ended and Yuri usually sought him out to go over the day’s shift. “There’s a place close by that you really need to check out. I’ve only been there like once or twice, but It’s really good food, and I’m dying for one of their burgers. Come on, let’s go.”

Viktor looked up from his stack of papers spread out before him and pinched the bridge of his nose, “What’s so special about this place that we _have_ to go?” A stress headache was threatening and he wasn’t in the mood to deal with Yuri.

“It's a greasy spoon. Burgers, beer. What’s not to like?”

He rolled his eyes. Apparently, Yuri equated greasy to tasty.

“They also have a floor show that I guess is pretty good too. If you like that sort of thing.”

This last statement surprised him. He never pegged Yuri for someone who enjoyed performances of any kind, let alone dancing girls. He smirked, “Well if I can expose you to more performance art, I’m in!”

Yuri blushed. “I’m not into that stuff, gross. I thought it would get you there. I mean, it’s at least better than Zanzibar.”

“That’s because Zanzibar is just a strip club,” he pointed out. “That’s not a very high standard to mark it with. Fine, let me finish these invoices and I’ll meet you there. What’s this place called anyway?”

“Yutopia.” He stood up and headed for the door. “I’ll give you an hour and if you’re not there, I’m coming back here and dragging your sorry ass out!” He let the door slam as he headed out of his office.

He sighed again and looked down at his work, rubbing his worn-out eyes. The motivation he’d had earlier in the day quickly drained out of him as he tried to sort out what he needed to finish tonight. None of it really, if he was honest. He always two steps ahead when it came to the paper train that was the business side of his job. It was the part of the job he liked the least, thus staying ahead of the tide kept it from overwhelming him. Viktor had started to notice lately that even the passion he had for the parts of his job that he loved was waning. He felt like he was just going through the motions. Plastering on his fake smile as he met with the board, maintaining an even tone with his supervisors, and even the little encouragements he gave to the individuals he encountered on the floor all left him feeling hollow. His spark was growing dim, and it was eating him up. His soul was crying out for substance and his work just wasn’t as fulfilling as it was in the past. He needed a change, but he didn’t have the first idea of what could that be.

**********

 _Never had much faith in love_  
_or miracles_  
_Never wanna put my heart_  
_on the line_  
_But swimming in your world is_  
_something spiritual_  
_I’m born again overtime you spend_  
_the night!_

_-Locked Out of Heaven by Bruno Mars_

The neon sign that read “Yutopia, Bar & Grill” buzzed as Viktor walked up to front door. The chorus of a Bruno Mars song and boisterous laughter assaulted his ears as he scanned the floor for Yuri. It was your standard urban restaurant with a bar off to side and tables in the center and lining the sides of an elevated stage with a catwalk. The stage was dim at the moment, and he hoped that meant the show hadn’t started yet since dance was his favorite out of the performing arts. But this being a greasy spoon, he tried to keep his expectations in check. He found Yuri by the bar with a beer in his hand and chatting with a woman with short dark hair that was bleached on the ends. She had held the dyed mass back with a wide headband. She laughed at Yuri, who was growling about something. They seemed to have a teasing banter going as he approached.

“Is this the golden boy in the flesh!?” the woman teased. “Yurio was telling me you’d be gracing our fine establishment tonight, but I didn’t believe you’d actually show! My name is Mari.” She extended her hand over the bar and Viktor shook it. “I tend the bar here.” Her dark eyes twinkled as she glanced at Yuri. “Yuuri’s gonna shit a brick when he finds out you’re here!”

“Yuri’s the one that suggested this in the first place,” Viktor’s face twisted up, clearly confused. “Why would he be upset?”

“Yuuri’s my brother and one of the dancers. I’ll let you wait and see.” Mari continued to giggle to herself.

“We’ll have two burgers with the works and two beers, Mari. It’s on him, by the way.” A knowing look was painted on his face as they settled into their seats. “The show starts in fifteen minutes, we’ll have our food before it starts.”

Yuri’s prediction turned out to be true when a dark-skinned boy breezed up to their table ten minutes later with two plates on his arm and two beers in the other. “Hey, Yurio! Here’s your- Oh my god. Is this who I think it is?” He gave the smile of someone who knows every secret to be told in the place as he set the plates and mugs down.

“Yeah, this old geezer is my uncle Viktor.” Yuri managed to say between bites of his burger. “Viktor this is Phichit, a waiter here. Oh,” as if just remembering, “He’s a dancer too.”

Viktor gave Phichit his high-watt smile as he shook the boy's hand. “Yurio? You have a nickname here? I thought you’d only been here ‘once or twice’?” he asked eyeing his young nephew.

“Oh, ha! Yurio is here every Friday.” Phichit laughed and winked at the little kitten who sputtered into his beer. Phichit leaned into Viktor with his hand around his mouth to feign a whisper. “I think he only comes here for the show. He’s always very prompt.” He tossed a wink in Yuri’s indignant direction.

Viktor looked at Yuri with a smirk who now had a priceless blush creeping across his face. “Now I really must see this show!”

“Shut up! Both of you! You’re being stupid!” Yuri buried his face in the long swig he took from his beer.

Just as Viktor was going to tease him again, the lights flashed down and back up, signaling that show was about to start. “Enjoy the show, boys!” Phichit sang as he headed back to the bar.

A thumping beat drew Viktor’s gaze back to the stage as the announcer welcomed her guests. A spotlight shone on a lithe young man with raven colored hair dressed in a shimmering black catsuit with scarlet and fuchsia flames made of an airy fabric wrapping from his shoulder down across his body. The fabric flames split at the hip, circled around each leg and ended at the ankle. A shimmering mesh filled in a cut out in the fabric around his midriff. His hips canted to beat as his graceful arms swirled and flicked above his head.

 _The club isn’t the best place to find a lover_  
_So the bar is where I go_  
_Me and my friends at the table_  
_Doing shots, drinking faster_  
_And then we talk slow_

The dancer’s deep brown eyes lingered over the audience as his hips continued to sway. His arms dropped and caressed his chest, moving slowly down towards hips. He sauntered down the stage, the spotlight chasing him like a lover. He stopped mid-way down the catwalk and as the chorus pulsed, he lowered himself down perched on his toes, knees spread, hands sliding down his thighs.  The young man deliberately caught Viktor’s eye as he winked and rose up, chest high like a puppet on a string.

 _Girl, you know I want your love_  
_Your love is handmade_  
_for somebody like me_  
_Come on, now, follow my lead_  
_I may be crazy don’t mind me_  
_Say, “Boy, let’s not talk too much”_  
_“Grab on my waist and put that body on me”_  
_Come on, now, follow my lead_  
_Come-come on, now follow my lead_

He twirled and stepped down the stage as the bridge began, mesmerizing Viktor with his steps across the floor. A flash. A lunge. A spin dipping low and thrusting his hips into a shiver of his nimble feet across the dusty black floor. Viktor's breath stumbled as the cloud of dust he kicked up flashed in the light, blurring the edges of his body and what a human body could do. The dancer spun again, faster this time, as the song began to climax. He turned, looking away from the audience, his arms thrown to the side like he was throwing away an old lover then swirled again and entwined his arms around himself, looking demurely down, inviting the next suitor to step up.

 _Every day, discovering something brand new_  
_I’m in love with the shape of you_

The spotlight went back and the crowd whistled and cheered for the dancer. Viktor was still staring at the empty stage as the lights came back up. He gripped Yuri’s arm and turned to face him. “You know him, right? You have to introduce me!”

“Oi, old man! You know him too!”

Viktor blinked at this new information. How could he know this beautiful creature and not have realized it? “How?”

“He works for you, dumbass!” Yuri barked. “Yuuri Katsuki. He’s a welder on my shift.”

Viktor’s eyes lit up and he smiled the first true smile he’d had in a long time. “He works for me?”


	3. All You’re Giving Me is Friction

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yuuri gets caught up in tornado Viktor!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Clarinda: So from here on out this is truly become a joint project. Through the magic of the internet and google docs, my co-author and I have discovered that our brains work well together. It has resulted in wonderful new content to this story. Also, there is a mention of a pack of tornados hitting Detroit. It really happened. Look it up. History is a cool thing. I hope you all enjoy!!  
> ヽ(o♡o)/
> 
> D_Toska: I have discovered many new things about writing this week. One is that it is both eerie and thrilling to literally write side by side with someone filling in blanks and tag teaming and watching their cursor blinking as they just hang back and watch the words going down, ready to jump in with a new great idea when the inspiration strikes. I write in what I call "my bubble" and this week that bubble has burst and all sorts of new twists came into the words. We both loved the experience and we hope you love the results!

 

 _Hey baby won't you look my way_  
_I can be your new addiction_  
Hey _baby what you gotta say?_  
_All you're giving me is fiction_  
_I'm a sorry sucker and this happens all the time_  
_I found out everybody talks_  
_Everybody talks, everybody talks_

_-Everybody Talks by Neon Trees_

Yuuri took the offered towel from Minako as he exited the darkened stage and mopped the sweat from his forehead then grabbed his glasses from her open palm. "Good show, Yuuri! Go clean up and take over for Phichit for the next hour."

“Will do.” He headed back to his dressing room wiping the sweat from his body and used the utility sink to freshen up. He pulled on a pair of black skinny jeans and the white Yutopia shirt before he headed out to the bar to relieve Phichit. He shouted over the din of the unusually boisterous crowd. “Where’s Phichit? He needs to get ready for his set.”

“He’s bringing another round to table six.”

His head swiveled over to the table by the stage and located Phichit who was laughing with Yurio and- “Oh shit!” A flash of silver hair caught his eye that could only belong to one person. Viktor fucking Nikiforov! His legs went weak, but he forced the stupid things to do something more useful than rattle like the pennies he and Phichit used to lay on the rail in front of the oncoming freight train and lunged behind the bar. Viktor Nikiforov was here at Yutopia. He was here eating a greasy burger and drinking beer. He’d seen Yuuri dance. “Oh god!” He tried to breathe as he sat on the dusty floor of the bar, but the train had hit and flattened his lungs. His boss, the president of the shop he worked for, Viktor fucking Nikiforov had seen him dance in a catsuit on stage. Panic shot through his body and the world lost its shape. Yuuri faintly felt a hand on his back.

“It's going to be okay, Yuuri.”Mari’s gentle voice grounded him back to something familiar. Something safe. Her hand ran in slow, soothing strokes over his upper back as she’d done so many times before. The touch began to refill his lungs.

After a few minutes, Yuuri’s breathing began to even out and he blinked up at Phichit who had come over and was now watching him with concern. He ran his shaking hand through his hair and carefully stood up facing away from the crowd. He tried to swallow down the rising tide of bile that was threatening to come up. Yuuri squeezed his fists together tightly and then shook them out, trying to rid himself of the lingering sparks from his attack. “Tell me they’ve paid their check and I don’t have to go over there.” He silently prayed that it would be true.

“Yeah. Viktor paid already and they just left,” Phichit confirmed. Mari’s hand continued over his rounded back as he clutched the shelf full of liquor bottles that he used to support his weak knees.

“He really enjoyed the show, by the way.” Phichit winked at him as he said this, apparently thinking this would make him feel better, but it only made him more embarrassed. “Don’t worry, Yuuri. I’m sure he didn’t even recognize you.”

This was the truest thing Phichit had said yet. Of course, Viktor wouldn’t recognize him. Yuuri was just a dime a dozen welder in his shop, a place that employed three shifts of workers. Why would he be any more special than any other person there? “Hurry up, Phichit!” He plastered a convincing smile on his face as he turned back around. “It's your time to shine. If you don’t get back there soon, Minako’s gonna make you wash dishes.”

Phichit squealed as he shed his apron and blew a kiss to Chris, who had poked his head into the pass-through from the kitchen to wish his boyfriend good luck. Yuuri quietly laughed at his friends’ antics and wrapped Phichit’s discarded apron around his waist and headed out into the crowd, his legs still feeling like he was watching that seemingly endless train rattling past while standing too close for any thoughts other than the nearness of it.

 _I can be cruel_  
_I don’t know why_  
_Why can’t my_ ba. _ll. oo. n. stay up in a perfectly windy sky_  
_I can be cruel_  
_I don’t know why_  
_I don’t know why_

_-Cruel by Tori Amos_

Yuuri clocked in five minutes early, as was his habit, and headed for the locker room. He threw on his layers of protective gear that was his own portable sauna then grabbed his helmet and gloves and headed to his station.

Yurio fell into step beside him. “Hey, just wanted to give you a heads up. I might have mentioned to the old man who you exactly you were after you made the guy obnoxiously sick with lust for you and your dancing.”

“I’m glad he enjoyed the performance, at least, but you must be mistaking a polite response for something else.” No one of Viktor’s status would even give a lowly welder slash dancer a second thought.

Yurio grabbed Yuuri’s shoulder and spun him around to look him in the eye, “You don’t understand. He hasn’t stopped talking about you since! ‘Wasn’t he entrancing! Did you see how he moved like he was making music with his body? Amazing!’” He waved his hands in the air to imitate the over top gushiness that Viktor in no possible way meant the way Yurio was clearly interpreting it. “It’s gross!”

Yuuri snickered at him. He couldn’t believe Viktor talked like that. Even if by some strange twist of the universe he did, it certainly wouldn’t be about him. “You’re mistaken. He was just being polite,” he reasserted.

“You’re not listening to me, Katsuki. He-” Yurio was cut off by the slinging of a heavy arm around his shoulders.

Dressed in a white dress shirt rolled up at the sleeves, a charcoal grey vest and slacks to match, and a red silk tie precisely tied about his slender neck, Yuuri had to make a supreme effort to not drool all over himself at the sight of Viktor Nikiforov so close to him. God, he’s handsome. The woody scent of his cologne mixing with the smell of the shop made Yuuri’s head spin.

“Yuurio! My favorite nephew! Why are you keeping this fine man from his work?” Viktor spoke in a mock accusatory tone. He winked at Yuuri who blushed up to his ears.

“Oi! Get off, old man!” Yurio ducked out from under Viktor’s arm. “You better not mess with my best worker’s head! If his work starts slipping because of your antics, I’ll be making you fill in to pick up the slack!” With that last statement, Yurio stomped off.

“What am I going to do with that boy? He seems to believe that I’d somehow be a bad influence on you. I can’t imagine why.” Viktor shook his head as he watched the little kitten go. “Oh well,” he sighed as he switched his gaze to Yuuri, his blue eyes twinkling. “You’re a marvelous dancer, by the way. Such grace and seduction. You truly live up to the name of Eros. I’d love to hear about your experience with dance: where you trained, what’s your inspiration, do you do your own choreography? Things like that. I just love hearing about dancers and their art especially ones as exceptionally talented as you. I mean, you’re truly incredible. Just absolutely breathtaking.” His voice bubbled and churned through the stream of praise as his heart-shaped smile grew and grew.

Yuuri’s frazzled brain tried to reconcile the two different personas of Viktor he had in his head. The calm, benevolent head of the shop and this effervescent, warm man in front of him. Usually, when a customer would get handsy or want something more with him, he would coyly deflect them, not offending them, but firmly shutting down their advances. But with his boss, he was at a loss. A small part of him was flattered that Viktor had enjoyed the show so much that he sought him out, but it would never work out. He was Viktor fucking Nikiforov. And Yuuri was just Yuuri, a welder by day and a dancer at greasy spoon by night. No education, save for high school, no money or connections, nothing that would be remotely enticing to someone like Viktor.

Even if he did have a small interest in him, it certainly couldn’t be anything more than a passing curiosity in his life. One that Viktor would one day look back on with his lovely wife and two cherubic children with an amused chuckle at his antics in his younger days. “A welder. I can’t believe I actually dated one of my welders. How ridiculous was I?” For Viktor, it could be nothing but this. For him, it couldn’t be anything other than a complete obliteration of the remnants of his heart should he stupidly choose to indulge in fantasies rather than acknowledge the simple fact that they lived in separate worlds and neither one of them could stand on the edges of them for very long.

“Thanks,” he mumbled as he secured his helmet and put on his gloves. 

Viktor’s face fell a bit at his cool response, but he put on a smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes. “Of course. You know, I love art in all its forms. The shop donates to many charities that give scholarships for those studying the arts.” He blinked expectedly at Yuuri as if he expected praise for his benevolence.

“That’s nice.” He gave Viktor an awkward smile. Picking up his torch and flipping down his mask, he assumed the matter concluded as he saw Viktor head off across the shop floor. _Yes, go. Forget me._ Viktor deserved someone much better than him. He could hold on to the tiny spark of happiness that Viktor’s praise had given him and that would be enough. 

 _But you, why you wanna give me a run-around_  
_Is it a sure-fire way to speed things up_  
_When all it does slow me down._

 _-Run-Around by Blues Traveler_  

When Yuuri was five years old, thirteen tornadoes struck the city of Detroit in a single day, three of which marched right through the center of the city, killing seven people. He remembered hiding with his parents and Mari in the bathroom of their apartment watching the weatherman reporting each new one on the tiny television his dad had hauled in and placed on the tiny white hexagonal tiles rimmed with dingy gray grout as the sirens wailed for what seemed like days. Since then, he’d always get nervous when the sky took on the tell-tale green hue that preceded the haunting whine of the siren that would signal an oncoming tornado.

Unfortunately, for all his talk of his generosity in donating to charities, Viktor hadn’t been quite so generous as to give him a heads up before he unleashed himself upon his life. From the steady stream of notes in his locker at work to the now daily walk-bys of his station, Viktor had become his own personal tornado of attention. As soon as he thought that must be it and he’d successfully hidden from the onslaught and rode out the last of the storm, Viktor’s smile would widen as he strode across the floor straight for him yet again.

Yuuri looked out at table six and saw Viktor’s face for the fourth week in a row. That man was going to get fat eating all those burgers. Taking a deep breath to steady himself, he headed to the bar to switch out with Phichit. “You’re up.” He took the offered apron from Phichit. “Is table six all set?”

“No, sorry. They want two more beers and their check. Just get it over with or, I don’t know, say yes to the man! He’s obviously head over heels for you, Yuuri. Give him a chance or at the very least, your number.” With a wink and a grin, he headed backstage.

Yuuri took the two beers and the check Mari handed him and with a deep steadying breath, he made his way to Viktor’s table. Unfortunately, he’d been too focused on Viktor to notice JJ, the owner of Zanzibar, make a bee-line to him and trap him into an interaction before he could make a graceful exit. “Shit.” Yuuri muttered under his breath as he put on his stage smile and greeted the smarmy man. “JJ, how good of you to grace us with your presence.” His skin crawled as JJ’s eyes slid down his body. He could almost feel the man’s hands all over him. “Don’t you have your own business to take care of?”

“Aw, Yuuri, my business would be so much better if you came and danced for me.” JJ’s voice oozed almost as much as the floor of the bar he owned, one of the nastiest strip joints in Detroit where modesty or shame was certainly not on the menu.

“Dancing is a generous label for what happens at your establishment.” He sidestepped JJ in order to continue on his original path, but JJ followed like a dog begging for scraps.

“But Yuuri, you’d bring in so much business!” He grabbed his arm that wasn’t holding the two beers. His fingers dug the flesh of Yuuri’s upper arm, trying to stake his claim right then and there.

“Let go, JJ! I wouldn’t-” He hissed at JJ as he attempted to shake him off. JJ’s eyes went narrow and then wide as Yuuri suddenly felt himself bump into the solid wall that was Viktor Nikiforov. Said wall of flesh reached past Yuuri, gripped JJ’s wrist and squeezed. JJ gritted his teeth, trying to hold on to the scraps of his ego Viktor was shredding apart.

“I think he asked you to let go.”

Yuuri shivered at the rumble he felt from Viktor’s chest and the coldness of his voice. JJ relinquished his hold on him and glared at Viktor. A now silent challenge played out. With a tsk, JJ conceded his loathsome defeat. He spun on his heel and headed out of Yutopia his preverbal tail between his legs.

Viktor took the forgotten beer from his hands and set them on the table. “Are you okay, Yuuri?” Concern etched into his fine features.

Relief from the sudden rescue was the only explanation Yuuri could come up with for chipping away at his very reasonable decision to just ride out Viktor’s misguided and certainly fleeting attention and allowing himself to indulge ever so slightly in the fantasy that it could actually be something closer to the finished steel his hands always caressed in admiration than the shimmering sparks that just blasted in his face and made it even harder to see through his foggy shield. He smiled warmly at him. “Thanks. That guy can be a real pushy ass.”

Viktor blushed and blinked as Yuuri often did when trying to clear those stupid sparks that blinded him from his task.

Oh, wow, He’s kinda cute when he blushes. He took some action other than stupidly staring and jammed his hands down into the pocket of his tattered apron and pulled out a paper that he crumpled slightly in his fist. “Oh, here’s your check.” Yeah, not much better.

“Thanks, Yuuri,” Viktor purred as he took the piece of paper he offered, “but I’d like your number more.” He winked, causing him to blush as well.

“Craaap…” Yurio dragged out the curse in a deep groan from his place at the table. “Now you’re both being gross!” He couldn’t be sure, but he thought he caught a hint of that sweet smile he almost never gave unguarded just before he took a sip of his fresh beer.

Yuuri hesitated for a moment and then he wasn’t sure if it was the pure joy that comes from the disappearance of JJ, or if he was drunk on beer fumes, or if his mind just felt like messing with him and really diving into that stupid fantasy, but whatever it was, something crazy possessed him and a word he wasn’t certain he was really saying stammered out from his lips.

“Sure!”

“Don’t listen- What, really?!” Viktor stuttered, being totally put off by Yuuri’s reply.

Yes, this man was very cute, and he totally shouldn’t be doing this but... He grabbed the check from Viktor’s hand, flipped it over and scribbled his number on the back then shoved it back into his hand before he lost his nerve. “Call me sometime.” He winked at him and turned to make his way back to the bar. Just to really drive home his little moment of insanity, he gave his hips a little extra swing as he walked, leaving a gobsmacked Viktor in his wake. _God, what have I done?_


	4. Seeing the Beauty Through the Pain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> First date!

_First things first_  
_I'm a say all the words inside my head_  
_I'm fired up and tired of the way that_  
_Things have been, oh-ooh_  
_The way that things have been, oh-ooh_

As soon as Yuuri unlocked the door to his apartment, he was greeted by Vicchan and, to his surprise, a text from Viktor. The little poodle danced in circles around his legs. "I'll take you for a walk in a minute." Yuuri patted him as he unlocked his phone.

Viktor- Did you get home safe, Yuuri ╰ (*´ ︶ `*) ╯ **♡**

Yes, I did -Yuuri

Viktor- Do you want to get coffee tomorrow?

Um, sure -Yuuri

Viktor- I'll meet you at Yutopia at 10 am and we'll find a place nearby

Great, I'll see there -Yuuri

Viktor- Good night, YUUUURI!ヽ(o♡o)/

Good night, Viktor -Yuuri

Yuuri blushed as he reread the exchange. Emojis. The man who ran a steel mill uses emojis. He shook his head at the cuteness of it all as he grabbed Vicchan's lead and headed back out of his apartment.

 _Second thing second_  
_Don't tell me what you think that I can be_  
_I'm the one at the sail, I'm the master_  
_Of my sea, oh-ooh_  
_The master of my sea, oh-ooh_

Saturday was bright and full of promise as Yuuri and Vicchan approached the darkened Yutopia to meet Viktor. He was running late due to the fact he second and third guessed on what to wear and whether or not he should bring Vicchan. The clothing dilemma was a lost cause due to his utter lack of fashion sense. His wardrobe for Yutopia was all picked out by Phichit who had been gifted with style, but he couldn’t bear to give him the gloating satisfaction of letting him help him choose his outfit. He couldn’t even believe his little outburst of insanity himself just yet. He’d prefer to keep this moment of insanity all to himself so he wouldn’t have to explain to everyone that it wasn’t what they thought it was when it was over. Vicchan, on the other hand, was a no-brainer. It was a beautiful day and rather than leave the poor thing inside another day, he'd brought the toy poodle along.

Yuuri spotted Viktor as Vicchan sprang forward to greet the larger caramel color poodle resting in front of him. "Heel!" The tiny ball of fluff ignored his order and instead got better acquainted with his larger counterpart. He cursed internally that he hadn't trained the dog better. Here he was embarrassing himself before the date had even started.

Not that this was really a date. This was just so that Viktor could see once and for all that his attention was misdirected and misplaced on someone like him. He had nothing to offer a man like him and surely after twenty minutes of empty conversation, Viktor would easily come to that very conclusion. He looked up as he heard Viktor laugh affectionately at the dogs’ antics.

"What cute dog!" Viktor made a noise Yuuri couldn’t place at first with how much it distorted his image of him. Was that a squeal? Did Viktor just… squeal? Yep. That was definitely a squeal. "What is this darling’s name?!" Viktor bent down to pet the tiny poodle that was now trying to tangle himself around his legs.

"Vicchan. Unfortunately, he doesn't listen too well."

"That's alright, Makka doesn't mind." His voiced dropped into the soft coo used on everything adorable as he rubbed the bigger dog between the ears. "This is Makkachin. She’s the only one who puts up with me."

Yuuri noticed a shade of sadness in Viktor's voice as he said this. How could a man like Viktor only have a dog for company? “What about Yurio? You seem to get along at work and when you come to Yutopia."

"Ah, well, Yuri just puts up with me really. Don't get me wrong," he started backtracking as he noticed the almost pitied expression on Yuuri's face, "we're more like brothers than friends. Those are what I truly lack."

Yuuri blushed at the bluntness of what Viktor just told him. He fidgeted with Vicchan's lead as he tried to think of a way to break the awkwardness that had settled on them. "Well....there's a cafe with patio about a block and a half away if you're still up for that coffee." His heart lodged itself tightly in his throat as he saw Viktor's ocean blue eyes light up at the reminder. Oh wow. This man will be the death of him. The two men headed down the street toward the cafe as the two poodles lead the way. 

 _I was broken from a young age_  
_Taking my sulking to masses_  
_Write down my poems for the few that_  
_Looked at me, took to me, shook to me, feeling me_  
_Singing from heartache, from the pain_  
_Take up my message from the veins_  
_Speaking my lesson from the brain_  
_Seeing the beauty through the_    
_Pain!_

Yuuri sat out at one of the outdoor tables with the two dogs as Viktor went inside to order. He fidgeted with the leads as he watched Viktor through the glass storefront of the coffee shop. He was stunning even when he did something as mundane as ordering coffee.

How am I going do this? Yuuri's internal panic was beginning to make him second guess every glance and expression. He seemed to be really attracted to Yuuri, but the dark voice in his head was saying that Viktor deserved someone better than a hapless welder slash dancer. So lost in his thoughts, he hadn't noticed Viktor returning with two paper cups.

"Green tea for the young gentleman and a caramel latte for me," Viktor chirped as he handed Yuuri his cup and sat across from him. He took back Makka's lead, but the dog didn't pay it any mind. He'd settled next to Vicchan who was resting his head on Yuuri's shoe. He glared at the dog and whispered, "Traitor!"

Yuuri giggled softly at Viktor's scold. "Don't be too hard on him. He just made a new friend." Yuuri reached down and scratched both dogs lovingly. "It's such a beautiful autumn day. I'm so glad you suggested this. I'd usually be practicing at Yutopia for next week’s routines. It's nice to take a break and just enjoy the city."

"Yeah, you're right. It is a beautiful day, especially from my view.” He smiled and winked with his eyes fixed right on Yuuri. “If it wasn't for Yurio, I'd never get out of the house for fun. I'm always busy, but not with anything that would count as fun." Viktor took a sip of his sweet latte. "Is dancing something you've thought about doing professionally other  than at Yutopia?”

“Um… yeah. I’d thought about it at one time, but it’s not really something that’s in the cards for me."

"Why not?"

"I couldn't get hired anywhere other than places like Yutopia. A professional dance company wouldn't give me a second look."

"What do you mean? You're a fantastic dancer! You're so incredibly talented, Yuuri. You're selling yourself short with that mindset."

"It’s not just about how well you dance. They want people with a proven history so they know they’re not going to pour tons of investment into someone who just flakes or can’t cut it in the end. It’s not just dancing to dance with a company. It’s being able to memorize an entire routine in a day, being able to hold up under weeks of twelve-hour rehearsals, being able to coordinate with the other dancers on the stage. Hell, just being able to understand the words they’re using. They don’t have time to explain the difference between a cavalier and a cabriole. It’s not just talent.”

“You could go to school and get your BFA in dance to get that proof. You need to show the rest of the world your beautiful dancing. I think you'd be splendid on stage at the Fox framed with that elegant gold and red and your name as the one that will draw the crowds. God, can you picture it, Yuuri? I can. You’re just too spectacular to hide away on such a forgotten stage."

He blushed under Viktor's praise. “Yeah, when I was in high school, I toyed with the idea of going to college for dance, but I've never had any formal training. At least not the kind of training you can put on an application. Everything I can do is what I picked up from the times I'd hang out at Minako's studio or in the clubs Phichit and I went to." The chatter of hundreds of high school juniors about what schools they were going to apply to filled his head. Wayne University and its incredible dance program was on his lips back when his life was still capable of holding dreams, but the screech of tires had slammed into those words and tore them from his lips. He shook his head to clear out the twisted metal and sighed.

Viktor had a puzzled expression on his face. "Why didn’t you? Did something happen? Did you not think you could pass the audition or something like that?" He placed his hand on Yuuri's and, in desperate need of some form of relief from his memories, he didn’t shy away from the touch.

"No, applying wasn’t even something I could consider.” His voice was soft as he gazed at their hands. Craving more connection and allowing himself a bit of indulgence in this short twenty minutes he had in exchange for helping Viktor to see the plain truth he was apparently blind to, he entwined his fingers his fingers with Viktor's, grounding himself in the heat of his hand.

The expression that greeted Yuuri as finally managed to look Viktor in the eyes was one of empathy and, again, that trace of sadness he'd noticed earlier. ”Why not?”

“It just wasn’t.” Yuuri flinched as his voice strained tighter. “I wasn’t born in a place where dreams happen.” He took a deep breath trying to relax the tension that Viktor was currently studying.

“I wasn’t either, you know. People work hard for their dreams. I believe dreams happen all over the place. They’re not limited to time or location. You could still go back to school and dance. If money is an issue, I can get you a scholarship. You’re an amazing dancer, Yuuri. Truly. I’ve never seen anyone move like you and I’ve seen a lot of dancers. You belong dancing on a stage bigger than that.”

“What do you mean you weren’t born where dreams happen? You were handed the keys to a successful business.”

“No. I was handed the keys to a business in a city on the brink of extinction. Do you think I just got lucky that we’re one of the only places left?”

“No. I guess not. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to imply that you were just handed everything. You certainly did work hard to make the mill successful in spite of its disadvantages, but you as a person were also born with a lot of advantages many in this world simply don’t have.”

“Yes, I was given advantages that helped me to succeed at what I do. But Yuuri,” Viktor squeezed their joined hands, “I can see when you dance, the yearning for something more. You just need to see yourself as those you love and support you do. Consider it. School that is.”

He hadn’t thought of the possibility of going back to school before. He’d given up on that dream a long time ago. His eyes dropped back to study their linked hands again. “I don’t know.” He looked up at Viktor whose enthusiasm was infectious and gave the man a small smile. “I’ll think about it.” Could he really do it? Dance for a living? Not just at Yutopia on the weekends. Was that truly what he wanted, what he still dreamed about?

“Tell me more about you.” Viktor stroked his thumb over the back of Yuuri’s hand. “What is your life other than dancing and working for me?”

“Um… dancing and working for you. That’s about all there is to me. Yuuri Katsuki in a nutshell.”

“There has to be more than that. What do you think about when you’re on the stage?”

“I think… I think about freedom. I think about the endless ways my body can move and what kind of power that brings me. I mostly don’t think at all though. That’s the best. When I don’t have to think for once and I can just feel what my body wants to do and let it do that.” He took a long swig of his tea. “What about you? What does the great Viktor Nikiforov do with his millions?”

“Find sexy dancers and bring them out for coffee. Or tea as their preference may be.” Viktor winked. “Though, I’ve only done that once so I don’t know if that qualifies as a hobby yet. Though, I am hoping to turn it into one. As for hobbies that I can say with more certainty, I love the arts as I mentioned before. That wasn’t just a line, you know. Giving back to the community. Showing them that arts aren’t just meant for the rich. That every soul is enriched by it and strives to express it. If I can help a child get the paints they need to become the next Van Gogh or give a chance to an up and coming singer, then I feel like I’m sharing my love with the whole city. No, the world!” His free hand flared out to the side in a grand gesture. 

“Quite poetic for a man who deals in cold, hard steel.”

“I think you’ll find, Yuuri,” Viktor gave their hands a little tug as he used them to pull himself over the table to lean in closer, “that appearances can be rather deceiving. You seem to have this idea of me that doesn’t quite match to who I really am. I’m not some ruthless business leader on a mission to cut down everything in my path. I’m not a slick salesman here to seduce you and leave you broken and abandoned. I’m a man, and if I’m being honest, a rather lonely man at that. All I have is my business and my dog and one very cranky nephew. I need more than that. I need the life and passion and excitement I see in you on stage. I need the warmth of someone’s hand. I need someone to discuss real ideas with. Discuss something, anything other than steel and paper.”

“I don’t know what you’re expecting to find in me, but there’s not a whole lot there.”

“I’m not expecting to find anything. I’ve already found it. Now I just want to see what it feels like. I don’t want anything from you but you yourself. I want Yuuri Katsuki, the welder, the dancer, the friend, the brother, the coworker. You. I haven’t just been hitting on you these past few weeks. I mean, yes, I’ve been hitting on you, but I’ve also been trying to learn about you and I really love what I’ve learned.

“I’m not a reckless man. You don’t run a business like I do and get away with being reckless in anything. I don’t upset my life for passing fancies and you’ve destroyed my life. Yuuri, do you even know what these weeks have been like since I’ve known of you? I can’t focus on anything for more than five seconds without your image coming in and chasing it out.”

“Me?! I’ve destroyed your life?! Do you have any idea whatsoever what you’ve done to mine?! I can’t turn around without you there! I’m seeing you even in my sleep!”

Viktor jumped back as his eyes widened then he leaned in closer than before. “You dream about me?”

Crap. “I, uh… I didn’t say…” He looked up to Viktor’s face and where he expected to see cool confidence, instead he saw… vulnerability. He sighed and scrunched up his face. “Yes. Yes, I dream about you.”

“Really? How long? How many dreams have you had of me?”

Crap. Crap. Crap. Crap. Why? Just… Why? He really needs to work on his lying skills.  “More than I should admit.” He peeked up at that almost childlike excitement on his face that grew even brighter with his answer.

“How many?”

“Let’s see… I’ve been working there for… six years? At an average of two a week that’s… six hundred and twenty-four plus just about every night of the past four weeks and that puts it at… six hundred and fifty-two. Give or take.” He wished, not for the first time, that the earth would open up and swallow him whole.

“Oh. My. God. Are you messing with me right now? Please don’t tell me you’re messing with me. That would be so cruel.”

“No. Sadly, pathetically, miserably not messing with you.” The heat from his blush was as hot as his days in front of his welding torch. He was certain Viktor could feel it through their hands.

“Yuuri! That’s… I feel like crying and kissing you. But I can’t do either of those. You’d think I’m a huge dork if I start crying right here on the sidewalk and you haven’t said I can kiss you and… You dreamt of me for that long? You wanted me for that long and you didn’t say anything?”

“Um… You’re my boss. You’re Viktor Nikiforov. I’m not a reckless man either and admitting that might just be the most reckless thing I’ve ever done and will ever do again.”

“If that is you being reckless, I highly encourage more reckless behavior in you. I love your reckless behavior. You just made my decade with it.”

“You’re not messing with me?” Yuuri peeked up at his earnest expression. 

“Never.”

They still had a few minutes left before the twenty he allotted was up. Maybe just a little more indulgence. Just one sweet memory as a memento. “You know,” he used their hands as leverage to lean in closer as Viktor had done until their faces were only inches away and his elbows dug into the little metal twists crisscrossing over the table, “I can’t give permission for a kiss I haven’t been asked for yet.”

“Yuuri...” Viktor released the paper cup he held and it nearly toppled over but it settled after a few rocks back and forth with a soft thunk. He locked his eyes on him as he brought his hand up to stroke it over his cheek then thread his fingers through his hair. “Can I kiss you?”

“I don’t know. Are you any good at it?” He grinned at Viktor’s gaping expression.

“Yuuri! I didn’t know you could be so cruel!”

“That didn’t turn up in the research? I must be doing a better job than I thought with hiding the bodies.”

Viktor laughed. “Bodies?”

“Oh, you didn’t know? I’m a Yakuza crime boss. In the Detroit extension that is.”

“Apparently, not a very good one if you’re surprised I didn’t find evidence on you.”

“Yeah, but... whatchya gonna do?” He shrugged and grinned at him again.

“Tell me I can kiss you already. That would be a much better use of those beautiful lips than telling lies with them.”

“Yeah, probably. I’m a terrible liar.”

Viktor inched closer, his breath now brushing over his lips. “You’re killing me, Yuuri Katsuki. Please, can I kiss you? I promise that even if I’m terrible at it, I’ll keep trying until I get it just right for you.”

“Okay, I guess I’ll let you give it a shot.”

“So cruel.” Viktor shook his head and grasped him the rest of the way into their kiss.

Viktor’s lips… frankly, he’d never tasted anything so sweet and so soft as that heart-shaped smile. They yielded to his perfectly and instead of his tongue demanding entrance, he invited him in with openness and teasing flicks and then joined him where he was. For one brief moment, their worlds reached within an exchanging breath of each other and they held onto every blissful second of connection they had.

Viktor pulled back and his eyes stayed closed through his smile. “How was that? Was I good enough for you?”

“It was terrible. You’re going to have to do it again.” 

His blue eyes opened and sparked with his widening smile. “As many times as it takes until you’re satisfied.” He pulled him back in again, this time with a little more insistence in bringing them closer.  

 _You made me a, you made me a believer, believer_  
_You break me down, you build me up, believer, believer_  
_I let the bullets fly, oh let them rain_  
_My luck, my love, my God, they came from_  
_Pain_  
_You made me a, you made me a believer, believer_

Yuuri sprinted up the stairs two at a time in his rush up to the apartment just above the bar and knocked on Minako’s door after he bid Viktor goodbye after their date.

“Come in, Yuuri!” Minako’s voice sang out from behind the door. Yuuri entered the apartment and scanned the place for his former teacher. The apartment wasn’t very big, but it was cozy with its well-worn furniture and scuffed wood floors. He’d spent so much time here over the years, it was his second home.

“How did you know it was me?” He made himself comfortable on the couch. Vicchan bounded up and snuggled next to him.

“I saw you saying goodbye to Viktor out front. I figured you’d at least come up and over analyze every detail with me.” Minako joined him in the living room and put her hands on her hips as she smiled down at him. “Am I wrong?”

Blushing, he groaned and put his head hands. “No, that's not the reason I’m here. I’d actually hoped you’d never know about that.”

She gasped. “But, Yuuri, how could you go without overthinking every glance and look with me? Hmm?” She grinned and moved to the kitchen and started to make coffee. “So what does bring you to my door this early? Do you need help with your choreography for this week?”

“No, I’ve got that. I’m going to go through it a couple of times before we open tonight.” Yuuri looked down at his hands. Twirling Vicchan’s lead, he tried to muster up the courage to ask her what he’d really come to say. “Well…as you know, I went out with Viktor this morning.”

Minako came and sat next to Vicchan, placing two cups of coffee on the small table in front of the couch.

“We talked about a lot of stuff and I may have mentioned that I had wanted to dance as a profession.” He paused looking up at her. “That I wanted to study dance at college.”

“And what did he say?” She ducked her head down to get Yuuri to meet her eyes, knowing he’d have to tell her if she looked him in the eyes.

“Well…um…he said it was a great idea,” Yuuri started to pink again at Minako’s stare. “He said I should do it, that he wanted to see me on stage at the Fox.”

“I knew he was smart.” Minako leaned back on the couch as she sipped her coffee. “I always told you could do it, but sometimes you need an outsider’s perspective to truly hear it.”

“What if he was just telling me that to be nice?”

“Stop right there, Yuuri.” She put her hand up. “You are one of the most talented dancers I’ve ever taught. I also don’t think that a man of Viktor’s status gives praise like that easily. Even if he’s trying to get into your pants.” Her eyebrow pulled up along with an amused smirk.

He choked on his mouthful of coffee and coughed into his arm with his face turning red for more than one reason before he could scold her. “Minako!”

“What, Yuuri? Don’t tell me you’re that blind.” She laughed at his shocked reaction. “Seriously, Yuuri. I think you should give college and Viktor some consideration. Have you still been saving up like I taught you?”

“Yeah.”

“I can chip in too and you know Mari would. It’s doable between us if that’s what you really want. As for Viktor, you deserve someone who encourages you to reach outside of your comfort zone. I think he might be good for you.”

He took a sip of his coffee. “I guess,” he murmured. His breath rippled across the surface of the dark liquid as he held it close for another sip. “I’ll think about it.” Seeing the doubt plastered on Minako’s face he continued. “No really, I will. College and Viktor both.” He took a breath that spread out through his shoulders and they softened as he took another sip. For the first time in too long, his thoughts held a glimmer of hope for the future.

 _Third things third_  
_Send a prayer to the ones up above_  
_All the hate that you've heard has turned your spirit to a dove, oh ooh_  
_Your spirit up above, oh ooh_  
_I was choking in the crowd_  
_Living my brain up in the cloud_  
_Falling like ashes to the ground_  
_Hoping my feelings, they would drown_  
_But they never did, ever lived, ebbing and flowing_  
_Inhibited, limited_  
_Till it broke up and it rained down_  
_It rained down, like_  
_You made me a, you made me a believer, believer_  
_You break me down, you built me up, believer, believer_  
_I let the bullets fly, oh let them rain_  
_My luck, my love, my God, they came from_  
_Pain_  
_You made me a, you made me a believer, believer_  

_-Believer by Imagine Dragons_

 


	5. At the Curtain of the Waterfall

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Viktor goes for a ride, sorta...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Clarinda: Woo! Another chapter! This one is a doozy! We get a glimpse of spicy katsudon and some angst. Sorry, not sorry! (mm*)

_Can you feel it?_  
_Now it's coming back. We can steal it._  
_If we bridge this gap,_  
_I can see you_  
_Through the curtains of the waterfall._  

Viktor had never felt like this before in his life. This giddy, bubbly mood had enveloped him for the last two weeks, and he was sure it had everything to do with Yuuri. He was sweet, charming, and didn’t realize how sexy he was, which made him want him all the more. They were taking it very slowly, which Viktor didn’t mind. He wanted Yuuri to trust him and feel safe, and he couldn’t help but notice that while he was willing to begin connecting with him physically, he’d sometimes become taciturn and lock up when he asked him more personal questions or pushed them forward a little too fast. It was like Yuuri kept his heart locked up behind high walls with dark twists and turns. He just had to work his way through patiently. The prize was worth every moment of the journey. Not to say that the journey was anything other than the most bliss he’d ever remembered experiencing.

So, slow and steady it was. His eyes drifted to Yuuri whose helmet was on and had his head bent over his work. It was almost time for lunch for Yuuri’s shift and Viktor wanted to ask him out for lunch. Nothing much, just something quick from one of the food trucks that lined the front of the shop. He made his way toward him. Clasping and unclasping his hands, trying to remove the nervous energy. Be subtle about this. He’s sensitive and easily overwhelmed and Viktor… Viktor’s main trait was that he was easily overwhelming. A small fluffy rabbit, that’s how he had to approach Yuuri. His progress toward Yuuri was halted by a hand on his shoulder. He turned to see Yuri glaring up at him.

“Oi, stupid! Are you trying to get that guy bullied or something?” Yuri’s voice hissed low, not wanting to draw the attention of others on the floor.

Viktor blinked down at him, “What are you talking about? I was just going to ask Yuuri if he’d like to join me for lunch. I don’t see any harm in that.”

Yuri smacked his forehead with his palm. “How stupid are you really, Viktor? Don’t you think at all about how your actions affect Yuuri here on the floor?” The exasperation was crystal clear in his tone. “He’s a tough guy, so he doesn’t let it get to him, but if you don’t stop 'Viktoring' him at work, it’s going to be bad for him. You’ve already done more than enough damage to his relations with the guys with your painfully obvious flirting. He’s only managed to hold on to any bit of respect because they all saw him rejecting you. If he goes with you now, he’s screwed.”

Horrified by this new information, Viktor took Yuri’s hands in his, making him blush. “I know! You can ask him to have lunch with you, and I can just show up! That's perfect!”

Yuri rolled his eyes and tugged his hands free from Viktor’s grasp, “It’s still not going to work, old man. Unless you plan to take him somewhere far from the shop?” Spying Viktor’s sheepish expression, Yuri deduced that Viktor had no such plan. “You’re just going have to leave him be here. For his sake and yours. Got it?”

Seeing this side of Yuri, he was reminded why he’d placed him in charge of his own shift. He was always looking out for what would be best for all involved. He had a knack for seeing all the angles. “You’re right.” Patting Yuri on the back as he turned back to his office. He’d have to keep his hands to himself. He could do that. For Yuuri.

 _Well,_ _we rushed it,_  
_Moving way too fast._ _That we crushed it, But it's in the past._  
_We can make this leap,_  
_Through the curtains of the waterfall._

By the time Friday arrived, Viktor was practically vibrating with excitement. During one of their now regular morning coffee dates, Yuuri had mentioned he was working on a special routine for tonight’s show as they lingered in their goodbye before they had to go to work and pretend that they were just business as usual.

Yuuri was blushing up to his ears as he confessed. “I, um, choreographed it especially with you in mind.” The young man timidly peeked up through his long dark lashes at Viktor who was struggling not to burst into flames right then and there.

A faint blush painted his cheeks as he smiled down at Yuuri. “Wow, I'm honored.” Now he’s catching Yuuri’s blushes too.  He felt like a damn teenager with his first love. Ah! Love. The word punched through him with shock and a desperate desire to grab Yuuri and kiss him right on the spot which he did. Repeatedly. Until his stomach grew hot with Yuuri’s fire and he had to pull back before his crushing desire sent Yuuri scrambling back hard and fast.

“Will you come and see it, Viktor?” Yuuri’s voice whispered into his shoulder sent a shiver through him.

He squeezed Yuuri tighter which made him squeak. “Of course, Yuuri. I love to see you dance and I can’t wait to see what you’ve created just for me.”

He entered Yutopia fifteen minutes before Yuuri was going to take the stage with a dozen red roses in his hand. He headed to the bar and waved Mari down.

“Well, it’s the man of the hour!” A smirk tugged at Mari’s mouth. “I hope you’ve prepared yourself for this evening’s performance. Yuuri is pulling out all the stops.”

His eyes widened at this statement. Oh god. He wasn’t confident he could control himself if Yuuri went full throttle on the stage. His thoughts must have played across his face because Mari started sniggering at him. He blushed as furiously as Yuuri would have.

“Head back and give those to him, already.” She motioned to the door at the end of the bar. “Don’t forget to wish him luck for me, too!”

With only ten minutes left, he used every inch of his long legs to head backstage. He ran into Minako as he got to the top of the stairs. “You get five minutes.” She jerked her thumb at the door at the end of the hall. “You make him late I’ll send you out on stage next week!”

Tucking the flowers behind his back, he took a steadying breath as knocked on the dressing room door. ”Yuuri, it’s Viktor! I came to wish you luck!” He heard the sound of a yelp and rushed activity before Yuuri finally opened the door. Wrapped in a black kimono robe with pink cherry blossoms scattered over it, his glossy black hair slicked back, and his eyes lined in black with a shimmering gold dusted across his skin, he stole Viktor’s breath as Viktor reached a hand out to adjust the glasses that had been hastily thrown on and were sitting crooked across his beautiful face. He was devastatingly gorgeous even if the look was only half finished. He smiled and dropped his hand with a soft caress along his cheek. With a sweeping motion, he revealed the roses from behind his back. Yuuri gasped and blushed as he took the flowers. He closed his eyes as he took a deep inhale of their lovely scent then looked up with a sweet twinkle in his eyes at his lover? Boyfriend? What were they really? Labels hadn’t been discussed, not that he needed one, but it would be nice to have some real place in Yuuri’s life.

“Thank you, Viktor. They're beautiful,”  His voice was soft under his lingering smile. His eyes flashed dark as half of his smile slipped away into a seductive smirk, his free hand coming up to cup Viktor’s cheek. “Tonight, don’t take your eyes off me.”

Viktor’s heart nearly leaped out of his chest at Yuuri’s sudden boldness. He leaned into the touch and gazed intently back at Yuuri. The air around them snapped and popped like the electric sparks that came from Yuuri’s welding torch as the magnetic pull that Yuuri had on Viktor since he’d seen him dance for the first time tugged his head down toward his lips with more exposed lust than any of their previous kisses had held.

“Yuuri! Five minutes to stage! Minako’s voice yanked the current from the air as she called up the stairs.

Both men blushed, and Yuuri’s wide eyes stared up at him for a moment before he spun back to his dressing room and slammed the door in Viktor’s stunned face.

“I warned you.” Minako chirped coyly.

Viktor sighed and headed back down the stairs. Yuri waved at him as he entered the dining room and he headed over. Viktor ran his shaking hand through his hair as he sat at the table that was so nerve-wrackingly close to the stage and the man who danced on it who knew precisely how to move to steal away his rationality. The flickering lights grabbed his attention to the center of the stage like they were Pavlov’s bell.

Minako’s now familiar voice boomed out of the speakers. “Welcome to Yutopia! Tonight, Eros would like to invite everyone to just ‘Shut up and Drive’!”

The guitar licks pulsed as the spotlight illuminated Yuuri standing on top of two chairs at center stage. He was dressed in a tight, blue leather racing jumpsuit with black and white stripes tracing the lines of his lithe body. Hands peeking out from matching blue half-gloves reached toward the ground and-

Oh dear Lord. When the spotlight went wide and illuminated all of Yuuri as he stepped down onto the stage, Viktor’s eyes fixed on Yuuri’s four-inch ‘fuck me’ heels.

 _I've been looking for a driver who is qualified_  
_So if you think that you're the one step into my ride_  
_I'm a fine-tuned supersonic speed machine_  
_Got a sunroof top and a gangster_

Yuuri strutted down the stage with all the power of a supermodel. When he reached the end, he turned on his heel and looked back at the audience over his jutted hip with a wink. The audience started to whoop and whistle as his hand slid up to his neck to grasp the zipper and slowly begin tugging it down. He only slid it half way down, stopping just below his chest with just a tantalizing hint of his hardened abs peeking out. He snaked his hand up to the opening and popped it open and closed to the beat of the music.

 _So if you feel it, let me know, know, know_  
_Come on now, what you waiting for, for, for_  
_My engine's ready to explode, explode, explode So start me up and watch me go, go, go, go_

The chorus kicked in, and he made his way back to the chairs and slid his captivating body down in one smooth motion. He gripped onto the seat as he fan kicked his long legs, crossing and uncrossing. He rolled to the adjacent chair and pushed himself into a handstand. First a lateral split, then a spread eagle, then he lowered himself back to the floor as the next verse started.

 _I got class like a '57 Cadillac_  
_And overdrive with a whole lot of boom in the back_  
_You look like you can handle what's under my hood_  
_You keep saying that you will, boy, I wish you would_  
_So if you feel it, let me know, know, know_  
_Come on now, what you waiting for, for, for_  
_My engine's ready to explode, explode, explode_  
_So start me up and watch me go, go, go, go_  

Yuuri had always expressed himself better on stage than he ever did off, but Viktor had no idea that he was feeling the same explosive attraction that he was. Now his message was loud and clear as he unzipped the jumpsuit down to his navel and slowly pulled his arm free. He let the top half of the jumpsuit fall, acting as a half skirt, accentuating the sway of his hips. His well-muscled torso was now exposed, and the body glitter he used gave him an otherworldly glow.

 _Get you where you wanna go, if you know what I mean_  
_Got a ride that's smoother than a limousine_  
_Can you handle the curves, can you run all the lights_  
_If you can, baby boy, then we can go all night_  
_'Cause it's 0 to 60 in 3.5_  
_Baby, you got the keys_  
_Now shut up and drive, drive, drive_  
_Shut up and drive, drive, drive_

Yuuri, now whipped into a frenzy at the climax of the song, slid down the catwalk on his knees to the end of the stage then leaned back and spun his arms above his body. He held himself a few inches off the floor, his knees spread wide as he pulsed himself to the beat. He pulled himself back up to a sitting position, sweat glistening along with the glitter on his chest. He licked his lips and reached back, placing his hands on the floor and flipped over, landing in split right in front of Viktor’s table. He shifted to face Viktor and winked. He snapped his legs together and rolled onto his stomach and cat crawled back to the chairs upstage, giving the audience a fine view of his assets on the way. Yuuri pulled himself up onto the chair, rolled and fan kicked his legs again, crossing his legs as the sounds of sirens and a sudden crash ended the song and the spotlight went black.

Viktor’s hands shook as he gripped the front of his shirt. His breath was labored and sweat beaded on his forehead. That was for him. Damn, that man never stops surprising him.

In a rush that was fueled by lust and the promise of it finally being fulfilled, Viktor made his way backstage. Not even bothering to knock on the door, he burst into Yuuri’s dressing room. He was standing there, towel in hand wiping the sweat from his eyes.

“I see you got my message.” A coy smile playing across his face. His eyes burned with the same heat that Viktor felt coursing through his veins.

There’s always a risk of disaster when working with molten steel. Vats can rise too high and spill their steel, equipment can break at the wrong moment, pressure can build until it explodes. Thankfully, Viktor had avoided all of these disasters at his mill that he managed with careful attention and protocols in place to keep everything running smoothly. His personal life apparently wasn’t so lucky. His caution didn’t protect him from a disastrous marriage to the wrong person, and it most definitely didn’t protect him from the explosion that was Yuuri Katsuki. Yuuri was every disaster all at once, his force ripping away every well-thought-out plan and melting Viktor down until he was nothing but a puddle of liquid steel at his mercy. But one thing he knew for sure about Yuuri was that his hand on the torch was always steady, and he never failed to reshape that flowing steel until it was something far superior to what it was. He let himself go into their grip, all open mouth kisses and hands reaching, feeling for satisfaction.

Yuuri’s skin was hot and wet from dancing. Viktor’s hands slid down his back as he pulled him closer. He wanted to be closer, needed to be closer to him. He inched the zipper lower with the slow ripping sound vibrating through his core. Yuuri’s hands slipped into his waistband and tugged his shirt free then started in on the buttons, pulling the shirt hard against his back as if he were frustrated with its very existence. Yuuri kicked his heels off then worked his mouth over the part of his chest exposed by the few buttons he had popped open on his way out of work.

Viktor started peeling the leather suit from his skin, and as the top of his hips were revealed, his breath started to seize up. His fingers poked in to explore further and found nothing but the firm, bare curve of his glorious ass.

“Yuuri! You dirty boy. No underwear? How scandalous.”

Yuuri didn’t remove his mouth from his chest to answer. Instead, he threw the shirt to the floor and mumbled his words around his mouthful of his skin. “Can’t. You’d see it through the costume. Even a thong. It was too tight.”

“Oh god. It was so tight.” He tugged at the stubborn leather that didn’t want to come away from the delicious swell of his hips. “A little too tight,” he laughed. “It won’t come off.”

“Viktor,” he glared up at him, his lips brushing against the base of his throat, “get this thing off me now. I don’t care how you do it.”

Viktor whimpered then slipped his hand down over his cock to protect it and gave a hard yank, freeing one hip. Another yank freed the other side, and he grabbed him up around his waist and tossed him onto the counter of his vanity sending jars and brushes clattering to the floor. Yuuri’s back slammed against the mirror as Viktor pushed against his stomach to peel the suit down his thighs. Oh, those thighs. It took everything he had to finish following Yuuri’s order instead of stopping to devour them right there. He grabbed his ankle and tugged one leg free, followed by the other. He paused for a moment to let his blown eyes take in the sight of Yuuri panting against the mirror, inviting thighs spread wide, waiting for Viktor to take him. He rushed back over him, taking his lips in his kiss and pressing his body hard against his as his hands worked to free himself from the lingering barrier of his pants. Yuuri’s voice started to spill moans through their kiss. The door burst open and slammed against the wall making them both jump.

Minako tucked her phone into her back pocket and grinned. “Thank you for your service, Viktor, but as much as I support Yuuri finally getting laid by your fine self, I need him out there to cover Phichit’s tables.”

“Minako!” Yuuri wailed as he clung to Viktor to cover himself the best he could.

“Sorry, baby doll, business waits for no lay. If I don’t have another dancer up there soon, the crowd’s gonna have my head.”

“What did you mean by thank you for my service?” Viktor swallowed hard, trying to gulp down his slamming heart and rein himself back in.

“Oh, I knew he’d need some help getting out of that thing, and I figured you’d be more than willing to assist him with that.” She winked and closed the door just enough to give them some privacy again without encouraging more progression in their activities.

“You’re the worst, Minako!” Yuuri shouted after her. “I will remember this the next time you ask me to help set you up with one of Phichit’s skating friends!”

“Yeah, yeah. Tell it to your paycheck! You made some amazing tips tonight!” Her voice echoed from down the stairs.  

 _Well,_ _I'm just a boy,_  
_With a broken toy,_  
_All lost and coy,_  
_At the curtains of the waterfall._  
_So it's here I stand,_  
_As a broken man, But I've found my friend,_  
_At the curtains of the waterfall._

Feeling inspired to give back to Yuuri, Viktor thought it would be a great gift to pick up an application and info packet to Wayne State University. He'd also swing by the dance office and have a chat with the chair of the department, Lilia Baranovskaya. He had met Lilia on several occasions at various art and dance functions around Detroit. She'd been the Prima ballerina for the Bolshoi Ballet and had retired to the US. He knocked on her office door, and she motioned him to come in.

"Ah, Viktor. What brings you to my office?" She glared at him, which he assumed was her default expression. "Are you finally setting up that scholarship you promised me?"

He cleared his throat. "Ah, no. I promised you that did, I?" Unfortunately, he had a bad habit of promising people things and promptly forgetting them.

Her glare intensified.

"I'll speak to the board about that this month," he promised, again. "No, I'm here to pick up an application for the dance program."

This caught her by surprise. Lilia's eyes actually widened, even if slightly. "Really? Are you thinking of a career change, Viktor?" She barely contained the incredulity in her tone.

"God, no! It's for a dear, um, friend of mine. He's a talented dancer. He fell on hard times right out of high school and couldn't continue his studies. He's kept up dancing on the side, but I think he should pursue it. He’s incredible. I’m telling you, he’s the best dancer I’ve ever seen."

"And does this talented young man have a name?" She reached down and pulled out a drawer on her desk and extracted a thick white envelope with the University logo on it.

"Kastski, Yuuri Katsuki." He took the envelope from Lilia.

"Well, tell Mr. Katsuki to fill out the application and call the office to schedule an audition. The application has an extra section where the applicant needs to fill out all their previous dance instruction and experience. I'd be happy to see anyone you'd consider talented." Lilia stood and extended her hand. "I look forward to seeing this talent in the flesh."

Viktor took her hand. "Thank you for your time, Lilia. You won't be sorry!"

 _Now I'm falling down,_  
_Through the crashing sound._  
_And you've come around,_  
_At the curtains of the waterfall._

 _And you rushed to me, And it sets us free._  
_So I fall to my knees,_  
_At the curtain of the waterfalls._

The next Sunday was colder with the winter winds that were beginning to blow in off of Lake St. Clair. Viktor spotted Yuuri sitting inside the cafe at a table near the back. He already had a steaming cup of what he assumed was green tea, in front of him. Sadly, since some people just didn’t get that dogs are great and belong everywhere people go, they had to leave their pups at home with the colder weather chasing them indoors. Somehow even the toasty cafe didn’t feel quite as warm without them as it did with the cool breezes on the patio and their dogs rapidly making best friends at their sides. Viktor ordered his caramel latte and joined Yuuri.

"Good morning." Yuuri smiled at him as he sat with his coffee and slipped his free hand into Viktor's.

"Good morning, Yuuri." He brought Yuuri's hand up and kissed his knuckles.

Yuuri blushed and looked down at their joined hands. This man is truly a gift. Speaking of…

"Yuuri, I have something for you!" He set the large white envelope on the table and slid it towards him.

"What is this, Viktor?" Yuuri stared at the envelope stamped with “Wayne State University” in large green letters in shock. He made no motions to take it. In fact, if Viktor wasn't mistaken, Yuuri's expression was one of horror.

Not the reaction he'd hoped for, but Viktor pressed on. "This is an application packet to Wayne’s dance program. I stopped by their office this week up and picked it up for you. I know the chair of the department and spoke to her about your talent." Viktor finally took a good look at Yuuri. He. He was white as a ghost, and his hands had begun to tremble.

"Why would you do this?" His voice was barely above a whisper.

"I thought you'd be delighted." His brows furrowed, trying to understand Yuuri's sudden mood change. "You said that’s where you dreamt of going." Viktor felt like he was drowning. His mind scrambled for something that would make this better.

Yuuri withdrew his hand, and Viktor felt cold from the loss. "I told you I'd think about it." He ran his hands through his hair and stood up. "I don't think I can do this, Viktor. I'm sorry." Even though his voice was still gentle, Viktor felt as though he’d just been slapped. Yuuri turned and headed out of the café, leaving Viktor stunned and his chest aching.


	6. You Bring Me Back to Life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Viktor meets Yuuri where he's at and receives so much in return.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Clarinda: Heads up kids! Rating change. There is a lot that happens in this chapter. If you read the original, most of this is the same. The changes are in Viktor and Yuuri's *ahem* coming together at the end. I love it so much more now and its thanks in no small part to my partner in crime. 
> 
> Also, there is a brief mention of sudden death. It's not written in detail, but crucial to the story. So if you really need to skip, read fast after Yuuri brings Viktor his tea and slow back down when Viktor starts to panic about comforting people. 
> 
> That's it from me, enjoy!

_If I told you this was only gonna hurt_   
_If I warned you, that the fire’s gonna burn_   
_Would you walking in, would you let me do it first_   
_Do it all in the name of love._

The grey, cold weather continued to hang over Detroit in the week following that disastrous date with Yuuri. Viktor’s normally upbeat disposition lay flat on the ground. With nothing to fill his day but work and nothing to fill his nights but glasses of vodka, he played the scene in his head again and again as he tried to see what he should have done differently. He unlocked his office door and sat behind his desk and put his head in his hands. He has to figure this out, figure out some way to fix this and get Yuuri back. The alternative was unthinkable. His thoughts were interrupted by his door suddenly being kicked in.

Yuri stomped in and slumped into one of his office chairs.

“Yuri. To what do I owe this warm welcome?”

His green eyes blazed. “You know very well why I’m here, Viktor! What did you do?!”

Viktor massaged the bridge of his nose to keep his pending headache at bay. “What do you mean, Yuri?” While he knew exactly what he was talking about, he didn’t want to discuss it at present.

“Yuuri, one of the best men on my shift, hasn’t been here all week!” Yuri’s fist slammed into his desk. “He didn't even do the show on Friday! He came looking like death warmed over and covered for Phichit then left without speaking to a soul unless it was to take their order.”

What? How had he not even noticed that Yuuri had been absent from the shop? True, he’d spent most of his time in his office, but he thought Yuuri had just been avoiding him as well on the floor. But to not show up to work, that seemed out of character for him.

“That guy hasn’t called in sick or taken a vacation the entire time he’s worked here! Hell, he takes overtime anytime it’s available!” He was fit to be tied as he stood and leaned over the edge of his desk. “You need to fix this!”

“How? I don’t even know what I did wrong.” He recounted the sad story of the gift he’d presented to Yuuri, how he’d rejected it and Viktor. “I just wanted to do something to help him achieve his dream.”

“Well, there’s where you fucked up! You’re always poking your nose in where it doesn’t belong! Do you get it? Maybe you don’t see it from all the way up here, but working men like him have pride. They don’t need or want some pampered busybody coming in and deciding for them how to live their lives. They don’t have luck or money or time or hope of escaping their lot, but they’ve got pride, and they hold onto it like you wouldn’t believe. It’s the only thing that makes living that life bearable. At least they get to choose what backbreaking, soul-crushing kind of work is gonna kill ‘em.

“You think you understand these men after taking a few tours and shaking their hands, but I work with them. I see how much they hate a pampered little thing like me telling them what to do and I see how not a damn one of them asks for help unless they’re missing a goddamn finger.”

“But I just gave him an application!” Viktor slammed his hands onto the desk and jolted to his feet, leaning into Yuri as much as he was leaning into him. “I just handed him a piece of paper! It’s his dream!” His arm flung out to the side.

“You still don’t get it! Guys like him don’t get to have dreams!” Yuri snarled and leaned further over his hands. “You think they all weren’t once starry-eyed little brats wishing for a way out of this place? You think they dreamt of working here? They didn’t. They woke up one day and realized that this was all they had. This was all life gave them. This was all they were. And don’t you think for a second that life ever lets them forget it.”

His mouth fell open, and he shifted back upright, blinking for a moment before he sank back into his chair and stared blankly at the wall as the view from Yuuri’s eyes finally cleared. He pictured himself filling out the application with Yuuri’s hand. ‘Trained: defunct little dance studio run by his mom’s no-name friend. Experience: Regular performer in a burlesque show in a greasy spoon.’ He knew the kind of people who would be looking at that application. They were his people. He knew what they’d think when they read that. And, of course, Yuuri knew that too. His head dropped to his desk. “How could I have been so stupid?!” The deep moan in his voice continued through the thumping of his forehead against the wood.

“That’s not a stretch for you, Viktor.” Yuri’s voice quieted to a low grumble, and he sank back into the chair.

Viktor looked up to glare at him.

“Now that you know how stupid you’ve been. What are you going to do to fix it?”

“I need to apologize to him. But how? Has he been back to work this week?” Viktor’s mind started to work again. “It’s Thursday, right?”

“Yeah, jeez, old man, don’t you even know what day it is or that I literally just told you two seconds ago that he hasn’t been to work?” Yuri rolled his eyes at him. Wait ‘til Friday and go see him at Yutopia. You’ll have more allies there.”

“Allies? I would have thought they’d all hate me because I hurt Yuuri.” This was one of the reasons he hadn’t gone there the week before to seek Yuuri out.

“Nah, they all think he’s being as stupid about this as you are.” He waved his hand dismissively. “They want him to be happy, and for whatever reason, they think you might be good for him.”

Bolstered by this information, Viktor made up his mind. “I'll go Friday and throw myself at his feet if that will help.”

“Oi, don’t overdo it! That won’t fix anything!”

“Well, I guess that rules out throwing myself at his feet naked.” He smiled for the first time that week.

“Gross.” He stuck out his tongue for emphasis. “I’m going back to work.” He turned and slammed the door shut with a loud bang. 

 _When this madness, when there’s poison in your head_  
_when the sadness leaves you broken_ _in your bed_  
_I will hold you in the depths of your despair_  
_But it’s all in the name of love_

Viktor waited nervously outside of Yutopia insanely early for the end of Yuuri’s shift which he at first attributed to nerves, but then later realized that he had shown up precisely on time to watch him dance. He wanted so badly to see him dance, but he didn't dare. It would have been too painful to see him in his element, and he didn’t want to distract him so instead, he waited with the cold numbing his nose as his breath puffed out in small clouds. He had enlisted Yuri’s help to talk to Phichit and get him to agree to walk home with Yuuri so that when he ran into Viktor outside, Phichit could maybe help talk him into hearing him out.

As he listened to the crooning lines of 'Animals' by Maroon 5, his determination to stay away from the performance waned, and he found himself edging closer to the door. His hand gripped the handle, and he slipped inside and headed for the back wall near the bar. It was dark, lights low for the performance, with the spotlight the brightest. Yuuri stole Viktor's breath as soon as he lifted his eyes to the stage.

 _Don't tell no lie, lie-lie-lie_  
_You can't deny-ny-ny-ny_  
_Got these desires-sire-sire-sire_  
_Yeah, Yeah, Yeah_  
_No girl don't lie-lie-lie_  
_You can't deny-ny-ny-ny_  
_Got these desire-sire-sire-sire_  
_Yeah, yeah, yeah_

Yuuri strutted upstage and struck his final pose. The spotlight blacked out and the audience applauded and hooted. Viktor felt a little weak at the knees and sagged down onto one of the bar stools.

Mari spotted him and came down. "How you holding up? Sorry, my brother can be a really stubborn ass sometimes." She patted his hand kindly. "So what's your plan for winning him back?"

“Pleading. Begging. Apologizing profusely. Groveling. Lots of groveling. Submitting myself to be in servitude to him for the rest of my life.”

“Ah, the usual then. Always a good choice.” She poured him a shot of something hard and he knocked it back with a wince then she filled it again with a wink. “On the house.”

"Thanks, Mari." Viktor sighed. "I was sure everyone here was gonna get out their shotguns and shovels."

"Nah, this isn't your fault. But if you really do hurt him. There will be a line, you hear me?"

"Yes, ma'am!”

“You better finish that quick and get out of here if you don’t want him to see you in here.”

He nodded and tossed back the burning liquid.

“Gambatte, Viktor!" She waved as he headed back into the cold to wait for Yuuri to finish his shift.  

He felt a little more confident about his plan than he did when he walked in. At least the liquor took some of the shaking from his hands and warmed him enough to wait comfortably in the blustering winds.

 _I wanna testify_  
_Scream in the holy light_  
_You bring me back to life_  
_And all in the name of love_  
_I wanna testify_  
_Scream in the holy light_  
_You bring me back to life_  
_And all in the name of love_

Viktor felt a little like a stalker as he watched Yuuri and Phichit leave Yutopia, turning to head towards Yuuri's apartment. Just as he was about to follow, he spotted two men come out from the alley a block ahead. They stood in the middle of the sidewalk blocking the smaller men's advance. Viktor recognized one of the burly thugs as JJ, the ass that had laid his hands on Yuuri the night Yuuri had finally given him his number. The other hung back behind him, but matched him in size and had black hair cut into a flat-top that made him look like he belonged in a greaser gang from the fifties.

"Hey, Yuuri." JJ rolled the name in his mouth with a sneer. "Have you thought about my offer yet?" He crossed his arms over his chest making his thick muscles bulge outward.

Phichit stepped in front of Yuuri. "Back off, JJ. Yuuri has no interest in a flesh parade!"

JJ sneered. "Maybe I need to be more persuasive!” His fist slammed into Phichit’s gut.

Viktor sprinted towards them as Yuuri lunged to protect his friend. JJ’s sidekick grabbed Yuuri and held him locked by his arms.

JJ brought his fist down on Phichit's back and he collapsed to the sidewalk. “I always get what I want. I always win."

Viktor finally caught up and decked JJ square in his perfect jaw, sending his head back and a crunching, bruising pain through his knuckles. Before his head came back up, he hit again in his gut. JJ doubled over, clutching his stomach. He kicked his leg behind JJ’s feet and thrust hard into his chest, throwing him back to land on his ass. With the other man distracted by his boss’s distress, he pulled Yuuri from his grasp.

The black-haired guy grabbed JJ’s hand to help him to his feet, and Viktor yanked Yuuri behind him as he lowered his stance and raised his fists. JJ lunged with rage spinning in his eyes, but the black-haired man held his grip on him and stopped his attack.

“Get off me, Georgi! I’ve gotta teach this asshole a lesson!”

“Come on, man. It’s not worth it. Don’t you know who that is? What do you think is gonna happen to your club when you assault Viktor Nikiforov? You think the police who have at least half of their family members working at his mill will look kindly at you for that?”

“He’s right, JJ.” Viktor’s voice laced with venom. “If you come near Yutopia or anyone who works there ever again, I will get your little club shut down so fast you’ll be stealing your lunch from the rats before your sign has been stripped from the door.”

JJ spat in his direction then turned and shoved Georgi ahead down the sidewalk as though it’d been his idea to leave the whole time.

Yuuri shoved past Viktor and ran over to Phichit’s side, dropping to his knees and gently placing his hand on his back. “Phichit! Phichit! Are you okay?!”

“Yeah.” Phichit groaned and rolled over onto his back. "I'm okay." Phichit’s voice was raspy. "Just give me a hand up." He reached his arm up to Viktor who had joined them and pulled him to his feet.

"Are you sure you're alright?" Yuuri put his arm around his friend, careful not to aggravate his injuries further. “Do we need to call an ambulance?”

Phichit smiled at him. “I’m fine, Yuuri. Stop freaking out. I'll just text Chris and have him come get me. He'll be more than happy to baby me. He’ll probably use it as a chance to practice his acting and play the hot nurse." He gave him a wink.

"We'll wait till he comes, okay?” Viktor locked his eyes on him to reassure him that he wasn’t going to be left alone, but he couldn’t stop them from flicking down to look at his hand when Yuuri reached out to grab it.

Phichit pulled out his phone and sent a quick text. It dinged in response a moment later. “He’s on his way.”

They waited for him to arrive, scanning the sidewalk and the dark alley just behind the next building for any incoming threats. It was strangely quiet after the commotion of the fight with only the occasional rattle of the wind knocking some piece of garbage down the street. Headlights turned the corner.

"Here's Chris! Thanks for the save, Viktor." Phichit patted Viktor on the shoulder and whispered, "Good luck!" Chris opened the car door for his lover and waved at Yuuri and Viktor.

"Let's get you home," Viktor gently tugged on Yuuri's hand.

"Yeah." Yuuri looked up at him with a weary smile.  

 _If I told you, we could bathe in all the lights_  
_Would you rise up, come and meet me in the sky_  
_Would you trust me, when you're jumping from the heights_  
_Would you fall in the name of love_

They were silent the on walk back to Yuuri's apartment. Viktor felt the slight tremor in Yuuri's hand as they walked, though it lessened the closer they got to his home. They entered the front of the building and headed to the freight elevator at the end of the hall.

They both turned and looked at each other. "I'm sorry." They laughed softly at the jumbled apologies.

Viktor cupped his cheek. "No, Yuuri. I was the one in the wrong. I shouldn't have pushed you into something like that. You told me you’d think about it and I should have just trusted that you meant what you said and would do what was best for you without me trying to boss you around.”

Yuuri brought his hand up to cover Viktor's, looking up at him. "No, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have taken my insecurities out on you. It was a nice gift, really. And it wasn’t about you bossing me around at all. I treated you terribly, just leaving like that with no explanation at all. You didn’t deserve that, especially not for just trying to do something nice for me. I’m so sorry, Viktor. I didn’t mean to hurt you, but I know I did. I know I have a lot to make up for, but there’s something that I haven’t told you yet that I probably should. Can you come in so we can talk?"

“I’d love to.” Viktor dipped his head down and placed a chaste kiss on Yuuri's lips, trying to put all the love he felt into this small gesture. The elevator stopped, and when the two men broke apart, the stars that lit Yuuri's deep brown eyes lit up Viktor’s heart. Yuuri pulled him down to the end of the hall and unlocked his apartment. Vicchan danced up to Yuuri who scooped up the little dog and hugged him tightly.

Yuuri peeked over the brown fluff and met Viktor's eyes. "I have to take him out for a minute. I’ll be right back."

Viktor nodded and Yuuri quickly grabbed Vicchan's lead and headed back out the door. Viktor turned and surveyed the apartment as he slid his arms out of his coat. A coat tree that looked more like some kind of modern art stood next to the door and he hung up his coat on it. He slipped off his shoes and headed further into the space. A dim light came from the kitchenette as well as from the street lights below. The light from outside had a bend to it due to the warped glaze on the old glass windows. The apartment had an open concept, being a studio loft. The different ‘rooms’, if they could be called that, were only divided by drywall partisans that didn’t reach the ceiling. A small kitchenette with a breakfast bar, a living room set up in the center of the space, and a corner of a bed that peeked out from behind the partisan made up the rest of the space. He guessed the bathroom was tucked somewhere over there. The decor was very Yuuri. Soft, comfortable, but functional. He settled onto the couch and waited for Yuuri’s return.

Viktor turned towards the door as he heard Yuuri entering with the tiny poodle in his hands. “I’m gonna put Vicchan in his crate.” Yuuri took off his shoes and coat and headed towards the bed area.

“You don’t have to if-”

“No, it’s okay. I usually put him up at night anyway. Otherwise, I’d never get a full night of sleep. He has a bladder cycle of drunk.” With a small smile, he headed into the bedroom.

What did Yuuri want to tell him and what did it have to do with their falling out? He felt like they were reconnecting or at least close to it and he couldn’t handle it if Yuuri closed off more of the corridors he was trying to navigate and left him in a place that he couldn’t make his way out of again. So lost in his thoughts, he hadn’t noticed Yuuri enter the kitchenette. His head was now buried in the fridge looking for something.

“I have tea or water?” Yuuri offered from inside the fridge.

“Tea, thanks.” He watched Yuuri fetch two glasses and pour the tea. He brought them over after he’d returned the bottle of tea to the fridge. He set them on the small worn table in front of the couch and sat next to Viktor. Viktor leaned forward, picked up his glass, and took a drink. It turned into a gulp. He hadn’t realized how thirsty he really was. He watched Yuuri out of the corner of his eye as he took small sips from his glass. Yuuri’s hand was shaking so hard, he was having trouble drinking with all of the sloshing liquid. He had his other hand pressed between his thighs. He dropped the glass to his leg, holding it tight with his eyes fixed on the waves sloshing about in the glass.  

“My folks had been visiting family upstate after Christmas of my senior year in high school. Mari and I had headed over to Minako’s while they were gone. They called before they left to let us know they were going to be late due to weather.” Yuuri took another trembling sip of his tea. “The call came around one in the morning from the highway patrol. They’d hit some black ice and slid off the road and ended upside down in a ditch. By the time they’d gotten to them they were dead.” Tears were now streaming down his face. He swiped at them with the back of his hand. “That was why I had to go to work instead of college. Minako sold her studio and bought the bar so that she’d have a way to support all of us.“ Yuuri’s breath was heaving with the weight of the memory. “I couldn’t just run off and chase some fairy tale when we all needed to band together just to survive.”

Viktor had no idea what to say or what to do. Comforting people… he was at best inadequate. This was so far beyond his abilities, but he had to do something. He set his glass down and reached for his hand to remove the glass from it that he was a little worried he might crush in his grip and replaced it with his hand. Yuuri squeezed onto him tightly and looked up at him with tears still in his eyes. Viktor nearly gasped with the force of Yuuri’s pain hitting him. He considered himself an empathetic person before, but what he felt for the suffering of a beggar or the worry in the eyes of his employees as news of another plant closing in the city made its way around the floor was more like a passing feeling of ‘oh, that’s unfortunate.’ Yuuri’s pain jumped into his body and settled as if it belonged there. It did belong there. It belonged there the same way his hand belonged in his, and his lips belonged pressed against his. His pain belonged in his heart because Yuuri belonged in his heart. He realized as he pulled Yuuri into his arms that there was nothing he could say that would fix this. It just doesn’t work like that. His heart wasn’t a machine he could pull apart and put back together good as new. The only thing that helped a heart was love. That, he could do.

He closed his eyes and pressed a kiss to the top of his head. “I’m sorry, Yuuri. I’m so sorry for your pain, and I’m sorry that I absolutely suck at comforting people, and I’m about ninety-nine percent sure that this is the worst time to say this, but I don’t know what else to say or do. I love you, Yuuri, and if there is anything I can do, anything at all, please tell me because I would love to do it for you.”

Yuuri pulled back just enough to look up at him with streaks of tears down his cheeks. “You love me?”

“Yes. I absolutely love you.”

“Really?” His voice cracked.

“I love you, Yuuri. I’ve never said anything in my life that I’ve meant more.” His hand trembled as he brought it up to wipe the tears from his face.

Yuuri closed his eyes and grabbed his hand as he turned to press a kiss to it. He looked back at him with a tiny smile curving his lips. “I love you too.”

“Really?” Viktor choked on the tears that sprang up before he had any hope of controlling them.

Yuuri’s smile widened and turned into a light laugh. “Yes, really. I kinda thought that was obvious when I admitted to dreaming about you over six hundred times.”

“Six hundred and fifty-two. Give or take.”

Yuuri laughed again and ducked his head before looking back up at him with a smile and eyes that held a sparkle from the love they shared, not from tears.

“But that was before you really knew me so yeah, you saying you love me too kinda caught me by surprise.” He wiped the back of his hand across his face. “Sorry for making such a display.”

Yuuri stretched up to kiss the tears on his cheeks. “You’re so pretty when you cry.” He chuckled at his indignant expression. “Sorry. But you are. I didn’t realize you did that too. And yeah, what I feel for you after getting to know you is different from what I felt before. It’s stronger, more real. But love is the only thing I’ve ever felt for you. It feels incredible to hear you say that you feel the same, even if it’s a bit incredible to believe.”

He gasped. “You don’t believe me?! I’m so hurt! I give you the truest thing I’ve ever said, and you don’t believe me.”

“I didn’t say that I don’t believe you, just that it’s so amazing, it doesn’t feel real. My life doesn’t allow for dreams to come true.”

“It does now. It always should have. What can I do to make my love for you feel real to you?”

Yuuri’s mahogany eyes fixed on him for a long while. He bit the side of his lip then laced his fingers into his. “Prove it.”

Before he could ask how exactly he could do that, Yuuri pulled him from the couch and lead him to the bed tucked behind the wall. Yuuri pulled him down into a kiss that started gentle but quickly deepened due to the desperate need they shared sparking bright and hot through their bodies. Viktor began to tremble with the force of his need to feel their connection. Yuuri pushed him backward until the back of his legs hit the bed, and they collapsed onto it. Straddling his hips, Yuuri wasted no time in working to free Viktor of his clothes. Viktor’s hands slid under Yuuri’s white ‘Yutopia’ t-shirt, and he yanked it over his head and tossed it on the floor. Yuuri already had Viktor’s shirt pulled off and was nudging him to lift his hips to pull his pants and black briefs off all at once. Moving his lips to Yuuri’s neck, he tried to keep up as he fumbled with the buckle on his pants. Yuuri wriggled free of his jeans and grabbed his own black boxers to pull them off with desperate whines starting to escape him.

Viktor grabbed his lips back against his and tasted the heat of Yuuri’s body pressed against a mirror demanding that he take him. He tasted the shimmer on his body and the jars clattering to the floor. He tasted caramel latte and Yuuri’s laugh in a kiss. He tasted his hope poured into notes that lined the bottom of Yuuri’s locker. He tasted Yuuri’s trust and the way his tongue sculpted the words, “I love you too.” He tasted every moment that had brought them to this one made of love wrapped up in passion. Yuuri was a spark that had lit Viktor with passion that threatened to consume him. He was ready to dance with Yuuri in that fire if it meant they’d be consumed together.  

Yuuri pulled back and stretched over him to grab something from the nightstand drawer. Even though he was only gone for a brief moment, he felt a ridiculous amount of relief when Yuuri came right back into their kiss with a condom and a bottle of lube tossed next to Viktor’s hand. Getting the hint, he cracked open the bottle and coated his fingers with the slick liquid. Yuuri raised his hips, and he moved his finger over his hole, caressing it gently before slipping inside. Yuuri sighed and started rocking back on his hand as Viktor worked his finger deeper into him. Another finger joined the first, and he gently stretched them apart as Yuuri’s moans started from deep within him. Viktor reveled in the sweet sound and added his third finger, taking his time to make sure he was ready even though he wanted nothing more than to be inside of him, be a part of him, right now.

Yuuri moved his lips down to Viktor’s neck as he trailed his hand down his stomach and ran his fingers over the head and down the length of his hardened cock. Viktor whined and pressed into his touch, and Yuuri gave him a few velvety strokes before he grabbed the condom and tore open the package. He rolled it smoothly over him and moved his lips higher to kiss just below Viktor’s ear as he whispered into it. “Viktor. Now. Please. I need you now.”

He gasped as Yuuri’s voice burned through every part of him. He swiped the remaining lube from his fingers around his shaft and held himself steady as Yuuri slowly eased onto his cock. He grabbed the side of Yuuri’s face with his free hand to keep it turned toward him so he could watch as pleasure flooded his gorgeous face. Yuuri bottomed out, and they both paused, eyes locked on each other and chests heaving.

“Yuuri, I love you so much.” His voice sounded far away, almost reverent, as he ran his hands down his chest to his caress his hips encouraging him to move.

“Love, Love, Love, you too.” The words fell rhythmically out of Yuuri’s lips as he began to shift his hips experimentally. His eyes lit up when he hit upon that oh so sweet spot and began to bounce in earnest.

Viktor watched in awe for a moment as Yuuri moved as he’d seen on stage like a man possessed. He gave his hips a gentle squeeze. “Yuuri, my love, you’re so beautiful.” He cried out as Yuuri clenched down on him and tossed his head back, his hips rocking faster. “So beautiful. Such a talented dancer. I can’t take my eyes off of you. You enthrall me with everything you do.”

‘Tell me more,’ Yuuri’s body begged as his hands pressed harder against Viktor’s chest. Yuuri’s eyes closed as his body melted with the deepening pleasure in him. His rhythm picked up the pace, gathering all of the pleasure they were capable of feeling, winding it tight and lighting their sparks through the friction.

“Everything. From the way your hand is always steady on the torch creating the smoothest welds I’ve ever seen, to the tiny curl of your lips right before you take a sip of your tea. The sway of your hips. Oh my god, the sway of your hips. That nearly knocks me out every time. The genuine smiles you give to everyone you care about. The fact that you’re the only one on the floor who respects Yurio and you never join in on the shit they talk behind his back… All of it. Everything you are, everything you do, I love it all. You have me completely spellbound, Yuuri Katsuki, and can I tell you a secret?” He tugged him down so he could wrap his arms around him and whisper into his ear. “I never want to be freed from it. If someone offered me a way to cure myself of you, I’d run the other way. I’d run the other way straight into your arms and beg you to bind me tighter.”

“You really mean it? You really love me?” His voice rasped in his ear.

“Yes, I really mean it. Yes, I really really love you, Yuuri Katsuki.” He thrust up into him with full force.

Yuuri whimpered and slipped his arms in behind Viktor’s neck as he rocked faster, their bodies pressed tight to each other. He held him tighter as they built up their pleasure to its peak. Yuuri’s body spasmed hard on his, pulsing tight around him as his hot cum spilled down Viktor’s stomach. He bucked his hips harder into Yuuri to chase his own orgasm over the edge.  He lost himself in the ecstasy as he melted into that pool of liquid steel under Yuuri’s heat. They rocked together in the flowing bliss until their cries slowed and Yuuri’s body collapsed with his strength drained on top of his.

He pressed kisses all over Yuuri’s glowing face. “I love you. I love you. I love you, Yuuri. Do you feel it now?”

“Yeah,” he paused to take in some more heaving breaths, “I feel it.”

“Was I good enough for you?”

“Terrible.” Yuuri grinned teasingly up, his eyes so full of joy that Viktor made it his mission right then and there to keep them lit with that spark. “I’m going to need you to do that again.”

“I can do that. As many times as it takes until you’re satisfied.” He smirked and flipped him onto his back, driving back into his body with his kiss.  

 _In the name of love, name of love_  
_In the name of love, name of love_  
_In the name of love, name of love_  
_In the name_  
_\- In the Name of Love by Martin Garrix & Bebe Rexha _

 


	7. Sweet Like a Chic-a-cherry Cola

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After a steamy morning, Yuuri shows Viktor his process.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Clarinda: Yeah!! They're in love! So now what? Well, this chapter is mostly relationship building, not much actual plot. Fluff and light smut with a dash of passion! Good times. The light smut is skippable, speed read starting at "Don't move an inch" and slow back down at "Did I mention you're dazzling!" 
> 
> Finally, please leave kudos and especially comments (my extremely shy co-author goes Viktor extra over them)! Also, please share this with others!!! 
> 
> Enjoy!! ヽ(o♡o)/ (<\--looks like Vikor, right?)

_Anytime I need to see your face_  
_I just close my eyes_  
_And I am taken to a place where your crystal in my mind_  
_And Magenta feelings take up shelter in the_  
_Base of my spine_  
_Sweet like a chic-a-cherry cola_

Yuuri blinked awake and stretched his sore muscles, trying to remember why his back ached so much. The sudden rush of memories made him wake in full and take in his surroundings. The bed was thoroughly rumpled, the blanket wrapped tightly around a mound that had silver hair poking out of it. Yuuri huffed a small laugh at the sight of the Viktor burrito welded to his side. Clothes were scattered around on the floor where they’d been tossed in their haste. He ran his hands through his hair as he tried to fit together all that had happened. His endless dream didn’t just come true; it took off far beyond what he had let himself consider possible even within his wildest fantasies. A slight bubble of panic rose in his chest with the fears that this was only a dream, that he was still asleep, that he’d only conjured up their mutual confession. Heat rose in his cheeks when he thought back on the glimmer of tears that Viktor had shed when he’d said that he loved him in return. He wanted to take that memory to his grave. And then they’d made love. As corny as it sounded, what had happened in this bed over and over last night was truest definition of making love that he could ever conceive.

He ran his fingers through Viktor’s silver hair and marveled at how soft it was. He felt an unfamiliar warmth take a hold of his heart. Happiness. He was happy. His pulse picked up as this new idea took root in his mind. He hadn't felt this light in so long that he’d almost forgotten he could even feel this way.

Viktor slowly stirred and opened his eyes. He rolled over and looked up at Yuuri, “Good morning.”

“Good morning.” He kept his voice soft, not wanting this dream to end. “At least, I think it's still morning. I haven’t checked.” Yuuri reached over to his nightstand for his glasses. Looking around the room, he tried to remember where his phone ended up and spotted his pants at the entrance to the bedroom. He shifted to get out of the bed, but Viktor tightened his arms around his waist and nuzzled his face into Yuuri’s stomach.

“I don’t care what time it is.”

Yuuri giggled softly. Someone was being spoiled this morning. He settled back onto his pillow and Viktor shifted to snuggle under Yuuri’s chin. Yes, staying like this was much nicer than returning to real life. The warmth and safety he felt was almost overwhelming.

“How are you feeling?" Viktor brought his hand up to caress his cheek and lifted his head to look him in the eyes.

He felt his cheeks heat under Viktor’s hand when he realized what he was asking him. “I- I am a bit sore, but I think I’ll live.”

“Good to hear.” He placed a sweet kiss on Yuuri’s lips. The rush of electricity flowed between them as Viktor deepened the kiss, tongues dancing in a now familiar rhythm. “Mmm... I could do this all day.” Viktor hummed against his lips as he broke away from the kiss. He carded his fingers through Yuuri’s raven hair as he looked deep into his eyes.

He could drown in those ocean blue eyes, but... “We should get up and shower. I have to work on my routine for next week sometime today.” He pulled Viktor close, putting his head back under his chin. He knew his actions were the opposite of what he’d just suggested, but he couldn’t convince his body to comply with reason.

Viktor’s body seemed to be in sync with Yuuri’s because he managed to snuggle closer and wrap one of his long legs around him. “We could shower together? Save water?” Viktor slyly suggested as he lightly ran his fingers lightly up and down Yuuri’s chest. He took a moment to swirl his finger around his nipple then he gave it a little flick.

Yuuri gasped at the sensation. “Viktor!” He grabbed Viktor’s hand and pulled him on top of himself. “If you don’t cut it out, we’re not going to make it to the shower.”

Viktor arched his brow at him. “Hmm... If I didn’t know better, you’re accusing me of being a tease?” At this last question, Viktor rocked his hips against him.

That broke any control he had left. He slipped out from under him and out of the bed and grabbed Viktor’s arms to tug him over to the edge, grasping his leg and ducking his head to press against Viktor’s stomach.

“What are you doing, Yuuri?”

In answer, he hoisted him up over his shoulders, staggering just a bit as he adjusted to the weight while Viktor yelped in surprise. He carried him with his muscles burning with his weight on top of their activities from last night to the bathroom where he plopped him down unceremoniously onto a tiled bench inside the glassed in shower.

The bathroom was lined with stone tiles over the walls and floor. A glass bowl sink sat on the cinnamon-colored wooden vanity. The toilet was hidden behind the wall of the shower which dominated most of the space with it being spacious enough for a small bench and room for someone else to stand. Yuuri turned on the hot water and the rain of water from the double shower head hit them both.

“Sit.” The commanding tone of Yuuri’s voice filled the hollow space as he began to wet his hair. “Don’t move an inch.”

Yuuri began to wash his own hair as Viktor watched him with a hard intensity. Let him watch. If he likes the shows so much, then a show he will get. Having finished his hair, he grabbed the body wash and began to soap himself up, dragging the sponge slowly along his body and following it with his free hand, pausing at the places that felt particularly good and giving them just a little extra attention. Viktor’s eyes were locked onto his movements, his eyes blown with lust and his cock filling quickly. Yuuri trained his fingers along his body as he rinsed himself clean. He moved closer to Viktor whose fingers were twitching with the need to touch him.

“Are you enjoying the view?”

The wolfish grin returned to Viktor's lips. “Oh, yes.” He raised his hands to grip Yuuri’s hips, but Yuuri gave him a look that said no touching. “Am I not allowed-”

He placed a finger to Viktor’s lips. “My turn.”

He leaned forward and gave Viktor a filthy open-mouthed kiss then slid his tongue down Viktor’s neck, leaving a nip on his collar bone. The man under him gasped then let out a huff of frustration as he continued to lick and nip his way down Viktor’s chest.

He knelt in front of Viktor, and his eyes flicked up to meet his as Viktor stared down with wonder at him. He leaned forward and flicked his tongue across the head of Viktor’s cock. He swirled his tongue around the tip, tasting the precum that had gathered. Viktor’s knuckles were white as they gripped the bench in his efforts to keep from touching him. His moan echoed off the tiles when Yuuri took him entirely in his mouth and sucked hard. He bobbed up and down the length of Viktor’s cock as he gripped the base. His mouth popped loudly off of him and he went to lick up the sensitive underside. Viktor whimpered under Yuuri’s ministrations, and his body trembled with an effort not to fuck into his mouth.

“I’m so close!” Viktor rasped above him.

He took him fully in his mouth again, humming contently. Viktor cried out as he came, his eyes screwed shut. He swallowed down all that Viktor gave him, sucking gently as Viktor came back to earth. He sat back on his heels and wiped his mouth as Viktor looked down in amazement.

“Did I mention that you’re dazzling?” Viktor’s chest heaved as he reached to place a gentle hand on his head.

“Not in so many words.” He stood up and offered Viktor a hand up. “But next time, don’t be a tease.” At this last word, he gave Viktor’s butt a little smack.

Viktor narrowed his eyes. “I think someone else needs to learn a lesson as well. You’re far too cruel, Yuuri Katsuki.” He pinned Yuuri against the tiles as he kissed him deeply. Yuuri’s hard cock pressed in between them. “Now, it’s my turn.” Viktor slowly descended to his knees. The water was ice cold by the time they finished.

 _Come stand a little bit closer_  
_Breathe in and get a bit higher_  
_You'll never know what hit you when_  
_I get to you_  
_Ooh I want you, I don't know if I need you but_  
_Ooh I'd die to find out_  
_Ooh I want you, I don't know if I need you but_  
_Ooh I'd die to find out_

_-I Want You by Savage Garden_

They dressed slowly, exchanging kisses like they were having a conversation. Lingering touches, as well as glances, continued as they walked to their usual café.

“Is Makkachin going to be okay with you gone for so long?” The poor poodle had been locked up since the previous day.

Viktor gave his hand a squeeze, “I texted Yurio before we left your apartment. My baby will be in good hands.”

They had a quick bite to eat with tea and a croissant for Yuuri along with a promise to eat a more substantial meal after he danced, and a sweet latte and a bagel with lox and onions and capers and a promise to use a mint for Viktor. Yuuri insisted on a second mint as they headed back to the quiet stage at Yutopia.

It was strange how much a space can change from one moment to a next. The bar flipped between a bustling chaos of lights and beer and Minako’s voice rattling over it all to this stale silence with chairs flipped onto tables and the chemical smell of all the attempts to scrub the decay from the space that were wasted on something so stuck in a place that hadn’t yet figured out how to move on from the vibrant life it had in the past. He was used to both, but now with Viktor here beside him, it had changed yet again even though nothing in it had changed at all. He was used to Viktor seeing him in this space filled with glittering noise, but inviting him in where its true character was revealed, letting him see how fleeting the glamour built upon it really was, felt even more intimate than they had been with their bodies.

“Pull a chair down and make yourself comfortable. I’m going to get the music and lights on.” Yuuri turned then and headed backstage, stopping off at his dressing room to change out of his street shoes.

The wings consisted of a few rope pulls for simple backdrops, a small light board, and a sound board. All simple fare, easy enough for one person to operate all three if needed. Yuuri went to the light board and tapped a button mark ‘practice’, which flooded the center of the stage with light and plugged his phone into the sound board. Pulling up the song he’d been thinking of for this week, he smiled to himself as he hit ‘repeat’.

“Viktor?” He peeked out from behind the side curtain with nerves firing harder in him than he ever had before a show.

Viktor had pulled down a chair from the table he always sat at and was waiting less than patiently with his knee bouncing and long fingers tapping on the table top. “Ready and waiting, my love!” He leaned forward in his chair now, eyes fixed on the stage.

Yuuri walked to center back and layed down on the boards and waited for the song to start. The beat began to pulse he moved his hips up to the beat.

_Turn the lights on!_

He lifted himself into a sitting position hands stretched out reaching for someone.

 _Every night I rush to my bed_  
_With hopes that maybe I'll get a chance to see you when I close my eyes_  
_I'm going outta my head_  
_Lost in a fairytale_  
_Can you hold my hands and be my guide?_  

Placing his hands on the floor, he pushed himself up to a sitting position and kicked his legs under himself, rising up to his feet. With one hand reaching out and pulling him forward, he spun and pulled in, wrapping his arms around himself.

 _Clouds filled with stars cover your skies_  
_And I hope it rains_  
_You're the perfect lullaby_  
_What kind of dream is this?_  

He slid his hand down his chest and pulled up at the hem of his shirt, teasing the audience with a peek at his abs. He spun and fell to his knees, arching back with his hand behind his head as he slid halfway down stage. Pausing to catch his breath, he tilted his head, eyes closed. Absorbed in the music.  

 _You can be a sweet dream or a beautiful nightmare_  
_Either way I don't wanna wake up from you_  
_(Turn the lights on!)_  
_Sweet dream or a beautiful nightmare_  
_Somebody pinch me, your love's too good to be true_  
_(Turn the lights on!)_

Yuuri sat in this trance like state as the song played through and began again. When the chorus kicked in, he popped up to his feet and launched into three barrel turns back up the stage to where he’d began. He paused with his eyes closed to let the song play through in whole again, feeling the new movements he wanted to connect to it with a subtle swaying of his body and gentle lifts of his limbs playing halfway through the movement. Feeling a deeper connection to the music now, he began the dance again from the top. He built the dance piece by piece sometimes repeating sections that were stuck while the music played ahead of him and joining back in when it smoothed out only to stumble into the next set of jumbled feet and falls out of position. He knew this was all a part of the process, but he’d never let anyone see it this rough before and the blush on his face was from more than just the heat of his effort. He always waited until Tuesday night or so, after the worst of it had been cleaned, before showing it to Phichit and Minako so they could decide on an outfit and work on how to get him out of it. He couldn’t stand to let someone see his soul poured out so completely bare and ragged at the edges and falling all over itself. Even his closest family was held back from that intimacy even though he knew they could be trusted.

This secret time to just be by himself, building his voice from scratch without worry about the voices of others was his favorite time. The solitude of it meant no eyes judging him, no one telling him that it wasn’t good enough, wasn’t polished enough. Every time he repeated the dance, it added a layer of protection between himself and the audience. This, letting Viktor see him with absolutely nothing to cover him, felt as though he’d been stripped naked and shoved onto a stage in front of millions all ready to heckle and jeer at his tiniest mistakes. But allowing him in deeper than anyone had been before, letting him touch the parts of himself that were still just fresh nerves waiting to see what touch felt like, added life to his movements that hadn’t existed before.

He could feel Viktor’s touch, but he hadn’t yet dared to identify whether the intensity of it was pleasure or pain, if his soul was accepted or rejected. He fell out of a tricky sequence of steps and landed on his ass, rattling the whole stage with an empty thud. He closed his eyes with the song playing far away from his mind and shame and frustration and pain and fear and worries that he’d never get it right, never get it good enough, churned through him. He glanced over to where Viktor sat in the same chair he claimed every Friday night. He blinked away the few tears that had started to pool in the edges of his eyes and cleared his view to see the exact same wonder on Viktor’s face that he had every time Yuuri looked past the blinding lights now highlighted perfectly with the flash removed from the room. The weight of his eyes, his mere presence, Yuuri had only felt an inkling of it when he’d come to see him dance in the shows. Now, he could feel the love in his gaze and how much joy he brought to Viktor with his dance.

His tears burst through, and he sat sobbing on the stage. Viktor jumped up and bounded onto the stage and dropped to his knees next to him.

“Yuuri! Are you hurt?! Did you get injured?”

He just shook his head, his sobs getting harder and stealing the breath he needed to speak.

Viktor wrapped his arms tight around him and pressed his head against his chest and his pounding heart. “What’s wrong, my love? Why are you crying?”

“I- I,” he gasped deep breaths trying to refill his lungs as his own brain searched for exactly why he was crying, “I… You. You love me.” As he said the words, they flowed in to those untouched spaces and cooled, welding them to himself and joining two separate pieces into a new whole. “You love me.”

“I do,” Viktor sounded utterly confused, “but… why is that making you cry? Did I do something wrong?”

He shook his head again. “Not sad. Happy.” He lifted his shirt and wiped his face with it. “I’m happy. So happy because-” hiccups started up as if his blubbering mess weren’t enough, “because you love me.”

“You’re crying this hard because… I love you? Because you’re so happy that I love you?”

He nodded as his tears ran harder again. “Sorry. Sorry, I’m… such a mess.”

“Don’t apologize.”

Viktor left a kiss on his forehead and he felt something wet drip down it. He looked up and those diamond tears of his slid down Viktor’s cheeks. Viktor smiled and kissed his wet, sloppy lips.

“Don’t apologize.”

“Sorry.”

They both started laughing and Yuuri tossed his arms around Viktor as well and they sat on the stage in a laughing, blubbering, hiccuping, pathetically happy mess. Their tears slowed and they wiped their faces and Yuuri stood up and brushed off his pants.

“Stay there.” Yuuri smiled as he ordered Viktor to stay on the stage just in front of his regular spot at the front right. “You’re a part of this performance.”

He waited for the music to start from the top and bent his dance around Viktor, giving him that space to fill up.

 _Tattoo your name across my heart_  
_So it will remain_  
_Not even death can make us part_  
_What kind of dream is this?_  

He stood at the back of the stage as the last chorus built, eyes locked on Viktor. He stretched back, curving his body down until his hands found the cool slab of the stage. He kicked his legs up and paused for a beat in a handstand before his legs opened up to the sides, and he followed his arch back to fall into a split. His hands came up to clutch his head as if to ward off the nightmare, and he writhed to the pulse of the bass.  

 _My guilty pleasure, I ain't going nowhere_  
_Baby, long as you're here_  
_I'll be floating on air_  
_('Cause you're my, you're my...)_  
_You can be a sweet dream or a beautiful nightmare_  
_Either way I don't wanna wake up from you_  
_(Turn the lights out!)_  
_Either way I don't wanna wake up from you_

_-Sweet Dreams by Beyonce_

He brought his hands back to the floor and snapped his legs together, toes pointed, always pointed, to extend his body to every inch. He rolled onto his stomach, his hands caressing the floor and down his body as he pulled his knees in under his stomach. He rose up then jumped to his feet, grasping for the dream in front of him. Looking at a fixed point in the horizon, he stepped into a turn and landed on his toes and whipped his body around, seeking that fixed point again before the motion made him lose where he was. He stepped again, arms opening to the sides and pulling them in, and opening again. He turned down the stage, gaining speed with every step and through every turn until he reached the end of the tiny stage and froze with only inches of the floor left under him.  


	8. Like a Rainbow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some experience the highest highs and the lowest lows.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Clarinda: Woot, not even the plague can stop this chapter!! Also, updates will slow down for these last two. We're shooting for once a week on Sundays. HEADS UP, this will also be in the tags, we see a panic attack from the outside, which is still pretty intense for some people. Thanks for your continued love and support!! Kudos and comments make our days!! Share if you enjoy!!! ヽ(o♡o)/

_You with the sad eyes,_  
_Don't be discouraged_  
_Though, I realize it's hard to take courage_  
_In a world full of people,_  
_You can lose sight of it all_  
_The darkness inside you can_  
_Make you feel so small_

Viktor clapped his ungloved hands in front of himself and rubbed them together in the chilled hallway then looked at his phone. 2:21. Yuuri had said they’d meet here at the stadium at two. He checked the text message for the hundredth time. Yes, he’d said two. Maybe the bus was late. Right, that’s it. He’s just running late. They were in love and dating. At least, Viktor knew they loved each other, the second part... He’d check with Yuuri later. No big deal.

A familiar mop of brown hair and blue framed glasses came into view, and Viktor let his breath out with a gush as the sight rushed relief into his chest. “Yuuuuri!”

Yuuri caught sight of him and waved. A splendid smile beamed at Viktor from across the lobby.

That warm smile grabbed him and pulled him straight toward Yuuri without any control of his own. As if he’d even considered trying to control it. Instead, he let the wonderfully disorienting sensation of being completely, utterly, overwhelming in love with that man and his sparkling brown eyes take the lead as he rushed for him and grabbed him into his arms at a speed just short of running. There. He was still in control. Sorta. He’d spent those agonizing minutes while he waited hoping that what they’d experienced in the past week really was everything he thought it was. The smile on Yuuri’s face when they pulled back from their welcoming kiss confirmed it. He beamed right back at Yuuri. “Hi. I’m glad you’re here. I was getting a little worried.”

“Yeah, sorry. I, uh… fell asleep.” He ran his fingers through his hair, pushing it back and mussing it up just a little in the most adorable way. “And I missed the bus.”

“You… fell asleep? It’s the middle of the afternoon.”

“Yeah, I don’t always sleep so great at night, so I sometimes end up crashing in the middle of the day when I can. Sorry. I didn’t mean to worry you.” Viktor couldn’t help but notice the smile on his face that said he was anything but sorry.

“You didn’t mean that.” Viktor grinned and kissed him again, bringing a fresh blush to his face.

“No. I didn’t. Well, I’m sorry for making you wait, but… I kinda like that you were worried. About me.” He tugged nervously at the ends of the emerald scarf Viktor was wearing.

“Of course I was worried about you, Yuuri. Come on. Let’s get our seats. We don’t want to miss Phichit’s performance.” He grabbed his hand and led him up the concrete steps and over the legs of the crowd already seated with a scattering of apologies for the disturbance over to the seats he had located while waiting for him. They sat on the cold, hard, blue seats as they nodded a greeting to Chris and he put his arm around Yuuri and held him close to his body for heat in the massive refrigerator that most people called an ice rink.

Yuuri shivered lightly and snuggled closer. “It’s so cold. I’m so used to the heat; I don’t know how to deal with the cold for very long. I don’t know how Phichit stands this all day. He says he loves it though.”

“Yeah, I love ice skating, but it’s definitely one of the more uncomfortable ones to watch live. You know if I hadn’t been born into a steel mill family and had to take on the responsibilities for it, I might have done something like this. Dancing or skating…  I just love it all so much.”

“Yeah, lots of things could be different if we were born into different worlds.” Yuuri stared out at the skater on the ice who was just closing out his performance with unfocused eyes and a mouth that had slipped into a frown.

“Yuuri?”

His eyes shot back up to him, and he blinked away the strange expression replacing it with a thin smile that didn’t quite make it to his eyes. “Oh, sorry. Spaced out. It happens sometimes.”

“What were you thinking about?”

“Nothing really. Oh, look! Phichit is up next!” He put his hand up to his mouth and called out. “Go, Phichit, go! Kick their asses!” He pumped his fist in the air.

Phichit glanced up from the ice he was circling and shook his head with a smile then waved.

“Go, Phichit!” Viktor shouted as loud as he could then chuckled. “I didn’t know you had such a sporting spirit.”

“Yeah, I can get a little competitive. Phichit tells me this is figure skating not football, but I want him to kick some ass and get the hell out of here, so I'm not holding back.” He leaned forward in his seat and clenched his free hand into a fist on his thigh, his eyes now fixed on Phichit with perfect clarity. “Especially on this song, I want him to do well. It’s from the movie ‘The King and the Skater.’ He’s been obsessed with it since we were kids and it’s the one that first inspired him to skate. It just means so much to him, and I want to see him win. So many of us… I just want to see one of us make it out.”

He started to open his mouth to say, ‘Why not you?’ But the crowd had quieted, and Phichit was beginning his performance. He closed his mouth and tried his best to watch Phichit on the ice, who was truly incredible out there, but his eyes kept coming back to Yuuri and the overwhelming desire he had to see his friend achieve his dreams that was written through every inch of his tensed body. He was hunched forward with his elbows braced on his knees and his hands tightened into fists, watching as though he could hold him up from every possible fall if he just stayed focused enough; if he just willed all of his hopes straight into him.

Phichit’s nearly perfect performance ended, and the crowd erupted into applause as Phichit fell to his knees with tears streaming down his cheeks. Yuuri froze for just a moment with shock tinged with that distant look from earlier before he burst into tears and clapped his hand over his mouth.

Yuuri looked up at him with smiling, teary eyes. “He did it. He did it! That was so good! Come on.” He tugged his arm to pull him to his feet to join the crowd in their standing ovation.

 _Show me a smile then_  
_Don't be unhappy_  
_Can't remember when_  
_I last saw you laughing_  
_This world makes you crazy_  
_And you've taken all you can bear_  
_Just call me up_  
_'Cause I'll always be there_

Yuuri bolted from his seat when the scores were posted, elbowing out Chris to gain the lead with a teasing shove. “I’ve been to more. I get him first.” He beamed at Chris’s pout through the tears still on his face then raced ahead to keep his advantage. Followed by Viktor and Chris who was trying his best to gain the lead and failing under Yuuri’s determination, they made their way down to the warm-up area. When he spotted Phichit, he threw his arms around his friend, nearly tackling him to the ground.

"You did great!" The tears freshened in his eyes. "You truly made that song your own! I knew you could do it!"

"Thanks, bestest bro." Phichit buried his head in Yuuri's shoulder. "It means so much to me that you were here cheering me on."

“My turn.” Chris pried Yuuri away then gathered Phichit to give him his kisses and congratulations.

"Congratulations on a wonderful performance, Phichit." Viktor patted him on the back.

“Thanks! Congratulations to you too. Do you know how many guys tried to score that one over the years? Like… hundreds. You basically won gold here too.”

“Phichit!” Yuuri scolded him.

“That is fantastic. I’ve always wanted to win a gold medal in something, and the fact that I won it with Yuuri makes that so much more thrilling.”

A tall man with curly brown hair pulled back into a high ponytail and light green eyes approached the group and cleared his throat. "Excuse me; my name is Celestino Cialdini. I'm here to speak to Phichit Chulanont."

Phichit let go of Chris and extended his hand to him. "That would be me, sir."

Celestino grasped the skater's hand and shook it. "I'm a coach from LA and I'm here scouting for new talent. Your performance was quite something. I'd like to talk to for a bit. Do you have a moment now?"

Phichit eyes widened as he digested what the man had said. "Wow, you want to talk to me?! Um, okay. Can my boyfriend join us?"

“That’s fine.”

He looked back at Yuuri. "We'll see you back at Yutopia. Mari said we'd have a celebratory round after the competition." He waved goodbye as he took Chris’s hand and followed Celestino.

"Well, that's an exciting development." Viktor glanced down at Yuuri who was staring after his friend. "Everything okay?"

"Oh, yeah." Yuuri looked over with a smile that looked as fragile as glass.

"Yuuri, are you sure you're alright?" He brushed his hand over his cheek which felt oddly flushed with the cold they were standing in. He lacked the clammy touch of a fever though so he doubted it was a physical illness that was plaguing him.

“I’m fine.” He tried to strengthen his smile but fell a little short in the task. “Let’s head over to Yutopia and see if Mari needs any help with the party. I have to stop at home though and let Vicchan out. I meant to before I left but ended up having to dash out of there. And there's something I need to grab.”

“Okay, Yuuri. Sounds good.” He put his hand on the small of his back to guide him through the skaters all rushing to put away their gear and those lucky few beaming for pictures.

 _So don’t be afraid to let them show_  
_Your true colors_  
_True colors are beautiful_  
_I see your true colors_  
_Shining through_

They walked into the bar that had been filled with red and gold balloons and a banner had been hung up over the stage reading, “Congratulations, Phichit!!!”

Mari was walking to the table nearest to it with trays stacked with burgers and fries balanced on her arms. “Hey, guys! Glad you’re here. I need some help. Yuuri, can you fill the wells with ice and, Viktor, you can help me move the tables so we can have a dance floor.“

Yuuri headed back to the kitchen after he let him go reluctantly with a kiss and he followed Mari to start moving tables and chairs.

“Perfect. Now I have you all to myself.” Mari rubbed her hands together with a wicked grin. “Okay, lover boy. Time for the shovel talk. I kinda gave you a little one already but that was before you thoroughly worked your way into his heart, so I have to do it again to make sure I’m keeping up my duties as the big sister. You understand.”

“Of course. Intimidate away.” He paused his shoving of the table and sat down on top of it.

“Don’t be an idiot. Yeah. That should cover it. Don’t be an idiot and I won’t have to come after you with a literal shovel. I mean, have mercy on me, please? If I really have to come after you, I mean, come on.” She gestured wildly between their massive size difference. “That’s just unfair labor practices and I’ll have to report you to the labor board.”

“But you don’t work for me.”

“Don’t worry. I’m sure you’re fucking something up there. I’ll find someone else to report you in my stead.”

Viktor nodded. “Yeah, that’s entirely possible. How do I make sure I’m not fucking things up with him? I really really don’t want to fuck things up with him. Help me help you?”

“Show me the money.”

Viktor started to stand up and reach for his wallet.

“Oh my god. Put that away. I was just kidding. Geez.”

“But, Mari, your advice here is highly valuable. It should be compensated for.” He sat back on the table.

“Yeah, compensate me by treating him with care. He’s… He’s really strong but really fragile at the same time. He’ll break a thousand times over and get up every time but what he’s been through… I mean it was rough on all of us but I think it’s hurt him the most. He’s always struggled even with minor things without freaking out and then having to carry that on top of his anxiety… I really don’t know how he keeps pushing through but it’s impressive. You know he has stage fright?”

“What, really?”

“Yeah. He loves dancing and he loves being on the stage, but it can be tough on him too. Especially if he’s doing a performance that’s particularly close to his heart; he’ll get really sick before he goes out. He forces himself out there anyway and ends up putting on a spectacular show. He’s so special and I love him so much and I just don’t want to see him get hurt. You seem genuine but… are you just slumming it?”

“No! Of course not! I don’t see him that way at all!”

“Good. I didn’t think so but I wanted to check your reaction to that question. There have been plenty over the years who tried… Thankfully he’s too smart to fall for bullshit which is why I trust you. Just… don’t be an idiot, okay?”

“How do I know if I’m being an idiot? Last time… I thought I was doing something nice, but it turned out I was actually being an idiot.”

“Just learn from your mistakes and keep caring. That’s really all we can do.”

“Thanks. I’ll try. I promise. I do love him.”

She smiled. “I know.”

Viktor glanced around the room with a frown. “Hey, hasn’t he been gone for awhile?”

She turned and looked toward the kitchen. “Yeah… he might be freaking out about something. Did anything happen earlier?”

“No. But… he was maybe a little off during the performance.”

“Yeah. He’s probably freaking out then.” She studied the kitchen doors with her face drawn in thought for a moment then turned back with a smile. “Okay, Mr. Knight in shining armor, you’re up! Go get him. It’s time you learn how to help him with this because it won’t be the only time. Just rub his upper back gently and talk soothingly but don’t be condescending. He’s not a baby. Don’t treat him like one or he will push you away so fast your head will spin.”

“Thanks.” He sprinted off for the swinging doors to the kitchen. The freezer door was open and Viktor pulled up short when he saw Yuuri crouched on the floor. Reaching out a tentative hand, he rubbed between his shoulders as Mari had told him. Even through his shirt, Yuuri’s skin was as cold as the air around them.

“Hey you, aren’t you getting cold hanging out in here? I thought you didn’t like the cold.” He felt Yuuri flinch under his touch, but then immediately stilled as Viktor continued his ministrations. “Give me your hand, sweetling, and I’ll help you up. Okay?”

Yuuri remained motionless for another moment. Viktor was beginning to rethink what he’d said when brown eyes reddened with tears looked up at him.

“Viktor? Why are you here?”

“Mari said you might want a little help, so here I am! Tell me what you need me to do?” Viktor spread out his arms in a come at me gesture.

Shaking his head as if to clear it, Yuuri gave him a small smile. “I’ll have to thank her for sending you.” Taking Viktor’s offered hand, he pulled himself up. Once he was on his feet, he took a few hesitant steps closer to Viktor and wrapped his arms around him. Viktor startled at firstthen pulled him closer and buried his nose in Yuuri’s hair. He didn’t know what had caused him to get like this, but he was relieved that he’d at least let him close enough to give comfort. Yuuri shivered hard against his body. He dragged him out into the steaming kitchen then wrapped him back up in his arms while Yuuri shivered against his heat.  

After Yuuri’s shaking stopped, Viktor kissed the top of his head then pulled back a little to see him better. “What happened, Yuuri? How did you end up almost freezing to death?”

“It wasn’t that bad. I would have gotten out on my own eventually.”

“Would you really? You were ice cold already when I found you. What happened? I know I suck at this, but please at least tell me what’s going on with you.”

Yuuri gave him a small smile. “You’re not nearly as bad at this as you think you are.”

“Great! So now tell me. You seemed to be upset at the competition too.”

“It’s not really anything that I can say. It’s just a feeling that comes over me. Sometimes I know why, but other times what’s causing it isn’t so clear.”

“So it wasn’t clear to you this time?”

“Um… maybe it was something to do with…”

“Yuuri!” Phichit’s voice bounced off the pots hanging from the rack above the stove. “You okay? Mari sent me in to check and make sure Viktor hadn’t royally fucked up.”

Yuuri smiled. “No, he was great. Thanks for checking on me. How did it go?”

“Is that my lover I hear?” Chris came out from the pantry with a clipboard then rushed to grab Phichit in his arms with a bright smile. “It is you, mon amour.” He gave him a deep kiss followed by a gentle peck on his nose. He turned to them. “When did you two get in here?”

“Just a little bit ago.” Yuuri smiled.

Phichit gripped Chris’s waist and turned to them with a dazzlingly happy smile. “You guys aren’t going to believe what happened! Celestino said that he wants to take me on as his student and he thinks I have a real shot at the international level, possibly even the Grand Prix! And he got me a sponsor so we can move out there, and I can train with him in LA, and Chris can pursue his acting, and I’m so happy I think I’m going to cry!”

Yuuri shoved away from him to wrap both Phichit and Chris in a hug as Phichit sniffled into his shoulder. “That is amazing! I’m so happy for you guys! I can’t believe it!”

“Me neither!” Phichit laughed through his tears. “I’m so happy! It’s everything I wanted. Skating at the top. Giving people back in Thailand a new view of skating. LA is going to be amazing, and Chris will finally get his shot too after all he’s done to support me. And you...” His happy tears deepened into gasping sobs. “I’m going to have to leave you.”

Yuuri’s body tensed, holding back his own tears that strangled his voice. “Don’t you dare cry sad tears over this. Just don’t. It’s everything I wanted for you too. Don’t you cry over this. Me and this place aren’t worth those tears. I’m still going to be cheering for you so loud you’ll be able to hear me all the way in LA so just don’t.” He trembled with the effort of holding back for the sake of his friend.

Phichit laughed again as he tried to sniff back his tears. “Yeah, you do that.”

“I will. I’ll cheer like I’m at the super bowl, so you go and give me something to cheer for, okay?” His voice nearly broke and he sucked in a quick gasp to cover it and refortify his resolve.

He nodded. “I’ll make you proud, Yuuri. I promise. I’ll make every sore throat worth it.”

“Yeah. Yeah, you will. Come on now. Stop crying. We have to celebrate. And I have something for you.” He pulled back and reached into his pocket and pulled out the flattened penny he had drilled a hole through and threaded onto a gold chain then lovingly polished until it gleamed. He held it out, and Phichit held the tiny medal in his fingertips as he studied it.

“Is this?...”

“The very first. From the day we met over skinned knees and a fight for the shiniest penny. You don’t know this, but I made my first wish for you to get everything you wanted that day and the train stamped it into this coin for me.”

Phichit clamped his hand over his mouth as the tears fell heavy again. He pulled his hand back away to let Yuuri clasp it around his neck with a kiss on his cheek.

“It worked so you make sure you hold onto it, so my wishes for you to keep on winning will go with you no matter where you go, right?”

Phichit just nodded, unable to speak and pulled Yuuri back into a tight hug. “I’m going to miss you so much.”

“Me too.” Yuuri’s voice scratched as he clamped his eyes closed in his final battle against his tears.

He let him go with a touch of a wistful smile, and Chris led Phichit into the bar kissing away his tears as they left. Yuuri stood watching the empty spot on the cracked tiles where they had been just a moment ago before he turned back to Viktor with a smile sliced across his face. “Come on. It’s time to celebrate.”

_I see your true colors_   
_And that's why I love you_   
_So don't be afraid_   
_To let them show your true colors_   
_True colors are beautiful_   
_Like a rainbow_

_-True Colors by Cyndi Lauper_

Viktor sat at his desk staring at that cursed envelope bearing the green letters that had so quickly driven Yuuri away from him. That one blank document held the power to strip away the thing he now couldn’t live without and he toyed with it in his mind like a game of Russian roulette. Don’t be an idiot. Don’t fuck it up. Learn from your mistakes. Keep caring. That last one kept flaring up, a lick of flame in the forge. Keep caring.

He pulled the papers from the envelope and stared at the blank spaces that would taunt Yuuri with judgment passed on his answers before human eyes ever even saw them. Learn from your mistakes. He picked up a pen and clicked the button on the top then smoothed his wrist over the paper before he set the tip to the sheet.

“Trained: 21 years of daily private coaching with the world-renowned Minako Okukawa, a recipient of numerous awards including-” He paused to check the spelling on the wiki page opened on his laptop. Minako’s face beamed from the picture in the top corner as she accepted a bouquet of roses from the woman with a stone face chipped ever so slightly into a smile.


	9. It wasn't paradise, but it was home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A magical night where so many truths are spoken and heard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Clarinda: (シ_ _)シ so sorry for the late post!! RL is a bitch sometimes. One more chapter to go!! OMG!! This one is a doozy though. We only cover one evening but managed to come in with our biggest word count. Also *Spicy Katsudon Alert!* If it's not your thing, you can speed read beginning at "Yuuri dragged him to the couch..." and slow down at "He nodded into his chest." Please leave kudos and comment if you enjoy!! ヽ(o♡o)/

_But everything was beautiful at the ballet_   
_Graceful men lift lovely girls in white_   
_Yes, everything was beautiful at ballet_   
_Hey! I was happy... at the ballet_

A sharp knock on the door brought a smile to Yuuri’s face. Viktor was fifteen minutes earlier than he’d told him. He was always early when he was excited about something. He wished he knew what he was supposed to be excited for as well, but he hadn’t told him where they were going, only that he’d send something for him to wear. The garment bag had arrived before he’d left for his set at Yutopia on Friday, but he hadn’t opened it until he’d gotten up this morning for fear of the fancy bag it came in. His fears turned out to be entirely justified when he finally opened it to reveal a crisp, Prussian blue three-piece suit made from a light wool fabric that had the slight lustrous sheen of silk and felt luxuriously soft under his hand. An ice blue shirt and navy tie along with a pair of tan leather wingtip shoes completed the look. The fit was impeccable, hugging his figure without any uncomfortable restriction. Viktor must have asked Phichit for his measurements for it to fit so well. He made one last check in the mirror to make sure that his hair was at least somewhat under control and went to answer the door.

“Yuuri!” Viktor’s eyes swept over him like a caress. “You look… Wow!” He pressed his hand over his open mouth.

He blushed as he let Viktor into his apartment. “You don’t look so shabby yourself.” Viktor’s suit was a dark grey similar to what he wore every day but made of finer fabrics and cut just a little tighter to his exquisite frame. A burgundy silk tie set off his alabaster skin.                          

Viktor revealed a bouquet of impeccably formed roses from behind his back that were so far beyond those he’d seen at the corner store it was hardly accurate to call them the same flower. “For you, sweetling.” He leaned over the fragrant bouquet to kiss his cheek.

He blushed lightly as he took them. “Oh, thank you, Viktor.” He dipped his nose into the heavenly blooms then looked up wistfully. “I don’t have anything to put them in, sadly.”

“Not a problem. I have an idea.” He led him into his apartment and went straight for the kitchen. “Please tell me you still have that coffee canister we finished off yesterday.”

“Yes, but you’re not really planning on putting something so beautiful in an old coffee can, are you?”

“You mean the coffee canister emptied over many cups of coffee together? Yeah, I think it’s perfect.” He rummaged under the sink and pulled it out with a triumphant smile. He rinsed and filled it then unwrapped the roses and stuck them in. The can was a little too short to properly support the large bouquet, but Viktor studied it for a moment then pushed the can back a few inches so the upper cabinets could help support the flowers. “See? Perfect.”

Yuuri giggled. “Yeah, ghetto rigging your uber expensive flowers. Real nice.”

Viktor sighed. “I happen to love it, but I’ll bring you a vase next time if you insist. Let's get going!” He took his hand and led them out of the apartment.

A sleek black car idled on the curb out front. Viktor opened the back passenger side door with a flourish, his hand tucked behind his back and motioning for Yuuri to get in with all the poise of a stately prince. He went around to the other side to join him.

“Are you going to tell me where we’re going, yet?” Yuuri’s anxiety was starting to get the better of him, and he gripped Viktor’s hand. “You got me all dressed up, so now what?”

“That, my dear,” he playfully tapped Yuri’s nose with his finger, “ is still a surprise.”

“Viktor! Seriously, why can’t you just tell me now if I’m going to find out soon anyway?”

His mouth set into a firm line. “You have no idea how surprises work, do you?”

“Apparently not. Just tell me please?” He gave him the best puppy dog eyes he could manage which made the set of Viktor’s mouth twitch as he tried to look away from him. Yuuri smiled and deepened his pleading expression. “Please, Viktor? I’d rather know where we’re going so I can have a few minutes at least to prepare myself mentally.”

Viktor glanced over at him with his lip still bitten trying to hold on against his begging then sighed. “Fine. We’re going to the ballet.”

“The- the ballet?” Yuuri’s eyes widened as a slight tremor set into his hands.

“Is that okay with you?”

He held a breath for a second then let it out. “Yeah.” He smoothed the wrinkled expression off his face and looked up with a smile. “Yeah, the ballet sounds amazing. Thank you, Viktor. That was so sweet of you to plan this for us.” He tugged at his hand to pull him down for a kiss. “You’re such an amazing boyfriend.”

Viktor gasped. “Boy- boyfriend? Did you just call me… your boyfriend?”

Yuuri’s smile fell. “Oh. Was I mistaken? I thought…”

Viktor launched across the seat to grab Yuuri into a tight kiss, his hands clasping around his head and mussing his already unruly hair further. He pulled back and smiled, his blue eyes shimmering so brightly in the city lights that whirled past the windows. “No. You weren’t mistaken at all, sweetling. I am absolutely your boyfriend.” He sounded like he was assuring both of them of that statement. Viktor smiled and kissed him again. “I’m your boyfriend.”

Yuuri laughed. “Yeah, I thought that was pretty obvious. Even I figured it out. Did you have doubts?”

“No. Not about you. I just didn’t know if you wanted to label whatever was going on and I didn’t want to pressure you. I wanted you so bad, and I’ve screwed up already and-”

Yuuri put his fingers on Viktor’s lips to halt the stream of babble that flowed nervously out. “Of course I want you to be my boyfriend. You’re mine, and I’m yours.” Cupping his face, he pulled him down for a sweet kiss.

The car slowed and came to a stop out front of the theatre. Yuuri stared up at the bright neon marquee framed by two winged lions that blazed in the night sky. The Fox Theatre was one of the last remaining jewels in this husk of a city. The glass doors glinted and were thrown wide inviting the world into its dazzling sights.

Viktor placed his hand on the small of Yuuri’s back and guided them inside the lobby layered in opulence. Massive coral pillars sitting atop bases of golden eagles and scalloped gold flanked a white marble staircase in the center of the room that lead to the balcony. He turned, looking over his shoulder, and caught sight of colossal organ pipes filling the wall above the entrance. Viktor led them toward the staircase around the swirling masses of people all soaked in their finest clothing.

 As they reached the stone jaguars carved into the base of the stairs, a lithe woman with blonde hair twisted neatly away from her face and the diamond necklace that hung heavy around her neck came up to Viktor and kissed both of his cheeks.

“Vitya, darling! How good to see you,” she trilled around a dazzling white smile. “Such a coincidence bumping into you here. You’re looking dashing as always.”

Viktor put on his most brilliant smile. “Anya, you’re looking quite lovely as well. I see Paris has treated you well.”

She spun a laugh through her bubbling charm. “Come now, Vitya. Have you already forgotten that I can’t stand Paris? So overrated. It's nothing but tourists and bread. No, I just came back from Milan. The fashion shows this year were rather disappointing. There were a few gems in there, but just so much of it was terribly blase. Don’t you just hate it when that happens?” She turned to Yuuri with her smile shining like headlights.

He shifted his weight between his feet. “Uh, I don’t really…”

“Anya,” Viktor scolded. “Where are your manners? You didn’t even introduce yourself.”

“Oh, you’re so right. Silly me. Please forgive me. I’m Anya Petrova, Viktor’s ex-wife.” She held her hand out with her well-manicured fingertips dripping off the ends.

“Um, nice to meet you.” He stared at her hand for a moment before one of the movies Phichit made him watched flashed in his mind and he took it gently and pressed a kiss to the back of it. He looked up with a wavering smile. “I’m Yuuri Katsuki. Viktor’s…” he glanced up at Viktor who was watching him with a sweet smile, “boyfriend.”

“Boyfriend?” Her eyes widened. “That’s so wonderful! I’m so glad Viktor finally found someone who can tolerate being second place to his dirty factory. What do you do, Yuuri?”

“Umm… I, um. I’m a welder.”

Anya blinked at him for a moment before her smile stretched back into place. “A welder? You mean you’re having a romantic, torrid love affair with your boss?” She leaned in as if she was sharing a secret. “How fantastic. I absolutely love it! God, that’s just, like, straight out of a movie! How did it happen? Tell me! I must know.”

“I, uh, well I dance too on the weekends and he happened to catch my show and, uh, started leaving notes in my locker and um…”

Viktor pressed his hand tighter against his back. “Yuuri, you’re forgetting the part where you made me fall absolutely head over heels in love with you from that first moment I saw you on stage.” He looked back at Anya. “He’s an incredible dancer. The finest dancer I’ve ever seen.”

“Wow, that’s quite a statement coming from you, Vitya. I seem to remember you could never quite decide which dancer was your favorite from week to week.”

“I’ve decided, and I’m so very certain of this one. Yuuri is just so far above every other dancer I’ve ever seen. He’s absolutely breathtaking on stage.”

Anya turned back to Yuuri with a smile. “Well then, I must absolutely get the chance to see you perform if such a picky and fickle man as Vitya has given you such an outstanding recommendation. When is your next performance?”

“Um, Friday, but uh, I really don’t think you, uh, would really like-”

“Hey, Katsuki!” Yurio’s gruff voice brought such an overwhelming relief at the interruption he felt like hugging him. “I see Vitya stuffed you into a suit too.”

“Yuri!” Yuuri gave him a genuine smile trying to convey to him just how welcome his presence was. At least someone else would be a fish out of water here too. “I’m so glad to see you.” He tried not to emphasize that ‘so’ as much as he had wanted to.

He gestured to a young man next to him with black hair cut into an undercut and the most stoic of expressions on his face. “Hey, have you met Otabek Altin? He’s my boyfriend.” He beamed just a little at saying that but tried to hide it.

Yuuri offered his hand and Otabek shook it with a slight nod and nothing else. He turned back to Yurio. “I didn’t know you had a boyfriend. How long have you been dating?”

“We’ve been friends for years, but just recently started dating.”

“Oh, is this the one you kept whining about every time we went on vacation somewhere that wasn’t Almaty, Yura?” Anya asked.

“I didn’t whine.”

“Oh, you most certainly did. I mean, I understand the complaints about going to Paris, but-”

Yurio curled his lips into a growling smile. “You still on that ‘Paris is a dump’ thing? Geez, Anya, how long can you keep up the same self-important ironic bull for? So blase.” He grinned wider as she narrowed her eyes.

“Still have that charming attitude I see.”

“Whatever, you just hate that I call you on your bull. I’m a delight.”

She scoffed as a round, balding man came up and patted Yurio on the back. “Now that is some truth right there, son.”

“Yakov, good to see you, old man.” Yurio gave his blindingly sweet smile in full force as he shook his hand. “How’s Liliya?”

Yakov glowered with a word spoken that was unintelligible to Yuuri but sounded like a bark.

Yurio laughed. “Yeah, that’s what you get for-” He cut off with his lips sealed as a stern woman approached. “Liliya, lovely to see you again, as always.” He smiled again and took her hand to kiss it.

They bantered back and forth for awhile with Yuuri randomly having to give his horribly awkward answers to every question asked of him in between his attention being captured by those stone jaguars and their bloodthirsty ruby eyes watching him. Why had the artist chosen rubies? Why not onyx or topaz or emerald? Something that looked like a normal eye color. Why did they create demonic jaguars to guard the staircase? Was the elevated view in need of such protection against those who might slip in through the cracks?

“So is this the friend you were telling me about, Viktor?” Liliya asked. “The dancer?”

Viktor tensed and his easy smile fell away. “Yes. Um, this is the one.” He glanced down at Yuuri with a strange expression.

“I see.” She narrowed her eyes and looked him over. “How old are you?”

“Um, twenty-four.”

Her eyes narrowed even more. “You’re a bit old for a new applicant. Viktor told me you were still keeping up your dancing. How exactly are you doing that?”

“Um…”

Viktor put his smile back on and looked back at her. “Liliya, you can get all of this information in his application once he submits it.” Once? “You don’t need to grill him on our date.”

“Yes, of course. You’re right. My apologies, young man.”

“Uh, yeah. It’s fine.” He glanced back at the jaguar staring him down.

“Come on, time to find our seats, yes?” Viktor grabbed him a little tighter and gave his farewells then led him up the stairs with Yurio and Otabek following behind.

Yuuri looked back over his shoulder as he walked past the demonic guards to check if they had come to life to do their jobs as Viktor led him up to the mezzanine. They stayed eerily still as if they were still deciding.

His breath caught at the sight of the vaulted ceilings covered in ornate gold leaf. The same coral pillars from the lobby framed the rows of red velvet seating. A giant stained glass ball, art deco style, hung from a midnight blue medallion at the peak of the dome. An opulent proscenium hung over the stage like an antique picture frame with reliefs of animals, human figures, flowers and starbursts defining its edges and holding the red curtain in place. A massive golden elephant’s head surrounded by four gilded screens crowned the center of the proscenium. Yuuri let his fingers run along the back of the red velvet seats embossed with a crest with a filigree “F” in the center as they headed towards theirs. 

They settled into their seats at the very front and center of the mezzanine and Yuuri pulled out his playbill to see the list of names that weren’t his. “So... The marquee read ‘Romeo and Juliet.’” He injected as much humor as he could muster. “Are you trying to tell me something, Viktor?”

“Only that he’s an idiot!” barked out Yurio, slouching down in his seat.

“I think it’s a beautiful story.” The three of them all looked over at Otabek who finally spoke for the first time since they’d met up.

“Well, it doesn’t suck, I guess.”

“Awww, Yura!” Viktor put his arm around his shoulders. “It appears you have some higher tastes as well.”

He pushed his arm away. “That’s-” Further ranting was cut off by the flickering of the lights signaling that the event was about to begin.

Yuuri sat forward in his seat, eyes fixed on the stage. The orchestra began to play the overture and he lost himself in the dream-like movement of the dancers before him.

_That everyone is beautiful at the ballet_   
_Every prince has got to have his swan_   
_Yes, everyone is beautiful at the ballet_

Yuuri was on his feet as soon as the curtain hit the stage pounding his already aching hands together to join the thunderous applause of the rest of the audience. He’d been white knuckling the railing of the half wall the entire last act. He wouldn’t be surprised if he’d left claw marks in the wood. Now that it was over he felt hollow, devoid of even the tears that were always so ready to betray him.

Viktor looked over with a smile still applauding the show. “I take it you liked it? You barely even blinked.”

He put his smile on and looked up. “Yeah, it was amazing. Thank you so much for bringing me. I loved every moment.”

He gave that smile that wrinkled around his eyes and leaned over for a quick kiss. “I’m so glad you enjoyed it.” The applause died out and house lights came up. Viktor took his hand and led him out into the lobby. The marble and gold were so blinding that Yuuri flinched. Time to go back into the real world where he was just a welder and nightclub dancer who was dating his boss. Yurio, Otabek, and Viktor were chatting as they headed out in biting wind that whipped in from the lake. It clawed at their coats and reddened their faces.

Viktor opened the door for him and waved to Yurio and Otabek who were climbing into their car then went to the other side to join him, taking his hand and kissing it and leaving them locked together the whole ride there. 

The car pulled up to a towering skyrise. Viktor led him to the elevators tucked just inside the sleek glass doors. They rode the elevator to the top floor, and a doorman opened wide a large oak door to usher them in. A young woman inside took the name and their coats then a man in a tuxedo led them to their table right by the expansive windows overlooking the city. From up here with all of the glittering lights you could easily forget that the city’s beams were so rotted out on the ground. His mind churned trying to make sense of the view that Viktor glanced at with an easy smile before turning his attention back to him.

“Lovely, isn’t it?”

“Yeah.” He took a sip of the lemon water the waiter had placed at his spot. “Pretty.”

Yurio and Otabek joined them and filled two of the empty chairs across the table. Yuuri turned his attention to the menu, taking note that there were no prices on anything or English for that matter. Viktor placed his hand on his forearm, easing his grip on the menu, which had turned vice-like in mere moments.

“I’ll order, don’t worry.”

“Yeah, everything is good here and Viktor’s good for it, Katsuki. I bum meals off him all the time.” Yurio gave him a wide smile.  

“Yeah you do, little punk. I spend half my salary feeding your scrawny butt.”

“Yeah, whatever. You ever even see the size of your paycheck or do you just roll in the money as it comes in and see if the bed feels thick enough for ya?”

“I Scrooge McDuck it every night. You caught me.” He laughed and gave Yuuri a wink.

“See? Knew it.” Yurio wagged a finger at him.

Yuuri glanced at the four other open chairs at the table. “Um, so, are there other people joining us?”

“Yes. They’re running a little behind us because they had to finish up after the performance.” The waiter approached and Viktor spoke to him in French that rolled right off his tongue without hesitation. The waiter gave a short bow and walked away.

“You speak French?” Yuuri tilted his head and drew his eyebrows together.

“Yes.”

He took another sip of the water with perfect circles of lemons floating among the ice. “Oh, you never told me.”

“Well, it’s just not the sort of thing you can bring up casually without sounding like a pretentious ass. But I guess while we’re on the subject, I speak Russian too.”

“Yeah, I got that by the accent.”

“Oh, right. I don’t ever think I have an accent, so I sometimes forget that others think I do. Do you like the accent?” He grinned and snuggled next to him to steal a quick peck on the cheek.

“Yeah, it’s cute.” He smiled then turned to his water again.

“Cute?” Viktor scoffed. “Accents are supposed to be sexy.”

“Well, I wasn’t going to say that here.”

“Just relax, Yuuri.” He nudged him with his elbow. “I want you to enjoy this. Just be yourself.”

“Right.”

Yakov and Liliya walked up just then with another younger couple following. The woman looked like she had just stepped off the stage with her dark hair glued into a bun and her face made up so the lights wouldn’t wash her out. Though, he doubted she really needed it with the intensity of her violet eyes. He peered at her feet expecting to see her pointe shoes still on, but she was wearing standard black heels and a little black dress. Viktor, Yuri, and Otabek stood at their chairs as her date pulled out her chair then tucked it in as she sat down. Yuuri scrambled to follow suit as Yakov did the same for Liliya despite the lines that carved deeper through his face as he did so. The men resumed their seats as the waiter came back with sparkling glasses and two bottles of wine.

The waiter did the thing with pouring a small bit for Viktor to first taste and approve just as they did in the movies, and the whole scene made Yuuri’s head spin just a bit. He’d never seen this Viktor before. This Viktor who was now ordering for the table in perfect French. This Viktor who sassed his ex-wife with so much tact, she didn’t even realize he was doing it. This Viktor who strode confidently through any world, who didn’t look over his shoulder at the jaguars guarding the gate. He guessed it was strange to assume he didn’t exist, but the Viktor next to him now slipped out as incomprehensibly as the words flowing from his tongue. He snapped the menu shut and handed it to the waiter who then came around to collect the rest.

Viktor turned to him with a smile and leaned in to keep his voice low enough for only him to hear. “Don’t worry. I didn’t order any snails.”

He managed a smile at his joke. “Oh, thank god. You’ve seen Pretty Woman.”

“Who hasn’t?”

“Me until last year and Phichit found out and corrected that immediately with five back to back viewings.”

Viktor laughed loudly drawing a few stares before he quieted with a hand pressed to his mouth and giggles still escaping from behind it. “Heh, excuse me.” 

Liliya’s intense glare effectively stamped out his remaining mirth. 

“Yuuri, you met this lovely woman earlier, but my manners never being what they should, I failed to introduce you. This is Liliya Baranovskaya, former Prima at the Bolshoi Ballet and now the chair of the dance program at Wayne State University. The gentleman with her is trophy husband, Yakov Feltsman. He’s on the board of the University as well as my company.”

The older couple nodded in Yuuri’s direction, Liliya, in particular, giving Yuuri a thorough once over. “Liliya, Yakov, this is Yuuri Katsuki, a level 3 welder at my downtown works and a professional dancer.” The amount of pride that Viktor packed into that modest introduction made Yuuri’s heart race in both love and embarrassment.

“This fine lady here is Donatella.” He gestured to the young woman. “She’s the current Prima with Met Ballet Touring Company.”

The young ballerina nodded at all of them around the table saving her brightest smile for Yuuri who blushed at her attention.

“And you are? My apologies. I knew you’d be joining us, but I’ve forgotten the name.” Viktor turned his bright blue eyes to the young man next to Donatella who bristled visibly at having been forgotten.

“Michele Crispino and none of you,” he motioned at the young men around the table, “are to even think about trying anything funny with my Donatella.”  

Viktor leveled a grin at him. “Oh, I guess I need to mention one significant thing about Yuuri here that might not be obvious to all. He’s my incredibly beloved boyfriend.”

Yurio laughed and gestured to Otabek. “Yeah, this is my boyfriend and professional DJ, Otabek Altin.”

Liliya’s eyebrows flicked up. “Oh, are we doing the possessive lover thing now?” She glanced at Yakov then moved the corner of her mouth into a smile. “Sorry, I gave that up for Lent. If anyone wants this trophy,” she gestured to Yakov, “I’m willing to trade him for an excellent price. I’m not sure I even wanted to win this one. I’ve got plenty of other trophies on my shelves that grumble far less.” She looked around the silent table. “No takers? Shocking.”

“Lent ended seven months ago,” Yakov grumbled.

“I’m particularly devout on this one, dear.”

“You must have to be,” Viktor gave her a winning smile, “after you sold your soul to the devil to dance like an angel.”

Liliya’s smile widened a little more. “The price of beauty is high after all. You must be willing to barter a soul if you wish to achieve it.”

Viktor tipped his glass slightly in Liliya’s direction then turned to the ballerina. “Donatella, you gave a marvelous performance this evening. It was so enthralling and masterful. Is there anything in your background that informed such a grand performance?”

She took a dainty sip of her wine and glanced at Yuuri then looked back at Viktor. “My background is not quite as interesting as you might think. I’m actually from right here in Detroit and not the nice part. I trained at a small local studio that had a hidden gem as its mistress, and that was what got me ahead. She was so masterful, but I guess she never really wanted to pursue anything grander. She wanted just to help out us poor local kids and give us a shot, and I’m so grateful that she did. Her doors were always open even if we just wanted to sit and watch other classes. She covered everything from classical ballet to hip-hop and jazz. Anything we wanted to learn she’d either gather up enough for a whole class or do one on one training. If we needed a ride to an audition or even just someone to turn to when things got tough around us, she’d offer herself gladly. I owe her a lot and when I’m ready to start coaching, I’d like to follow in her footsteps.”

Yuuri smiled a little to himself. She sounds like someone Minako would be friends with.

“That’s truly remarkable. I don’t understand why you’d say it’s nothing interesting. Skill and talent have very little to do with fancy buildings and names known worldwide. I think it’s so admirable that your mistress chose to give her help where it was needed most and that you seek to do the same. I applaud you for that. If you reach that point in your life and need resources or connections to help you achieve your goals, please feel free to seek me out. I would be delighted to help you.”

“Thank you. I will certainly keep that in mind.”

“You really want to go back to that slum?” Michele wrinkled his nose. “I thought you couldn’t wait to get out. Why would you want to waste all of your hard work to rot in a place like that?”

“I’ve seen plenty of this world and it’s not much different than the place I left, so why shouldn’t I come back here and share what I’ve learned so others can realize their dreams?”

“Because you’re too beautiful and too talented to live in a slum and I certainly don’t want to go back there.”

“No one said you had to, Mickey. You’re free to go where you wish.”

Michele huffed and opened his mouth to rebuff when a fleet of waiters surrounded the table and set out an elaborately plated greyish brown circle laying on a yellow sauce and topped with strips of green sprouts before each diner. “Bon Appetit!”

Yuuri glanced down at his, what was this, an appetizer? He looked down at the silverware. He glanced up nervously to see the others appraising the food, placing napkins on laps, and selecting a utensil. Yurio caught his eye and smiled, tapping his finger on the outermost fork. Yuuri gave him a small smile and picked up what he hoped was the right fork.

“Foie gras,” Viktor helpfully whispered into his ear. Or it would have been helpful had he known what that was.

They cleared their plates of the delicious and still unidentified food, and the waiters returned to replace those plates with a lightly crisped fillet of fish topped with a shower of chopped green herbs and slices of lemon.

“Oh, I love this wine pairing with this sole meunière.” Michele sniffed his glass before taking an exaggerated sip.

Liliya tapped her blood red nail forcefully on the base of her wine glass. “Really, Mr. Crispino, there’s no need to slurp the wine like it’s tea. We’re not at a tasting.”

The waiters brought out a small dish of a mildly lemon flavored solid slushy type thing then replaced the white wine with a red that Viktor again approved alongside a bubbling crock of beans slow baked with goose and sausage which Viktor told him was called cassoulet and which his tongue told him was incredible. Nearly as good as katsudon. Almost. He was trying to contain his eyes rolling back in his head as he dove into the dish when he noticed Donatella watching him. He blushed and put his fork down to take a sip of wine and remind himself to savor the food.

“You know there was one other person in my history that I failed to mention earlier, Viktor.” Donatella turned her attention away from him to smile at Viktor.

“Oh?” He took a sip of wine to clear his mouth. “Who was that?”

“A boy a couple of years older than me and many levels above me who trained at the same studio I did. I watched his class every day. He was just so incredible when he moved. He was easily the best among us, and I admired him so much. He gave me something to look up to and something to strive for. He was so kind too. He was always helping his classmates when they were struggling and he always had a smile for everyone even though he was a little shy. I’ve met a lot of people in this world I live in now who think that being at the top means backstabbing and nasty attitudes, but I’ve never forgotten him showing me what being on the top should really look like.”

Viktor beamed at her then turned to smile at him and grasped his hand for a moment. “We never really get anywhere alone, do we?”

She returned the smile. “No. Those who surround us define everything for who we’ll become and what we’ll achieve.”

“Well said, dear.” Liliya gave her an almost affectionate smile.

“I disagree.” Michele took another sip of his wine, though much more subtly this time. “If you had let everyone define what you became, you would have never left that slum. You would have been just like them. You worked yourself to rise above those around you. How can you say they defined you?”

“I said it defines you, not that it limits you to just what’s around you. You could have an abusive parent and grow up making sure you’re nothing like them and they’ve still defined you. You’re a different person for having encountered them. You might not have cared so much about being gentle if the alternative wasn’t so clear to you. You can choose people around you to look up to and let the good things they offer define you in a way that helps you rise higher. I didn’t say it as though you’re a slave to what you’re born in, just that it gives shape to who you become. I’m proud of where I’m from.”

“You shouldn’t be. That place is nothing but a rotting pit filled with miserable people.” Michele sniffed and took a bite of the fish.

“And you’re such a delight, huh?” Yurio gave his sweet smile that had a nasty bite hiding behind it. “Those people you’re talking about are guys I work with every day. They’re great guys who work harder than anyone I’ve ever met. I admire them. I like that world a whole lot more than this one. It’s not nearly as suffocating with the weight of so much ego and pretension to navigate.”

Viktor smiled proudly. “Very well spoken, Yura. I would be nowhere without the hard-working men and women who support my mill. They aren’t just the foundation; they’re the beams and the fire and the skill and the finished product under their proud hands. I owe them everything. Maybe if more of us up here looked for ways to clear the rust and repair the machines, their homes wouldn’t be so rotten and their lives wouldn’t be something to overcome.”

Yuuri’s brows furrowed as he took another sip of wine. Why was he talking about the people who worked for him as if one of them wasn’t sitting right next to him? It’s not like it was a secret. He had announced it himself. Why was he trying so hard to prove that he valued the guys at the mill? He took another bite of the cassoulet which suddenly tasted dry and heavy. He had to take another drink to clear it from his mouth. He shook his head lightly. It’s just his anxiety flaring up. Viktor loves him. He said that he just wanted him to be himself. He’s not ashamed of him. He forced another bite and chewed slowly trying to regain the delicious comfort it had just a moment ago.  

Michele scoffed. “You have no idea what kind of people live in places like that. You think that they are who they are because of where they live, but where they live is a direct result of who they are as people. Of course, we can’t control where we’re born so a few are born there who can get out and they do so without help. The rest stay because that’s where they belong. Even if you tried to fix it up as you say, they’d just return it to a slum.”

Viktor dropped his fork with a loud clatter and his hands tightened as his eyes narrowed. “You have no idea the struggles some people face trying to achieve their goals when their environment and their experiences and their resources are all set against them. You think-”

“Vitka!” Yakov barked. “Change the subject. There are no arguments at dinner.”

Viktor’s temper seethed for a moment then he turned to look at Yuuri and softened. “Yes. You’re right. This is supposed to be enjoyable for everyone, and we’ve fallen into some unpleasant topics. I apologize for the outburst.”

“You’ve always been a paladin for this cause, Vitya.” Lilya gave him a softened expression. “I don’t believe you,” she rehardened as she glanced at Michele, “owe any apologies. Your father raised an admirable man. Though your memory could use some serious tuning.”

Viktor beamed at her. “I actually spoke to my board last month and the scholarship for the dance program is all set up and set to be funded on the first of next month. I’ll email you the details.”

“Is it now? That’s wonderful news.” She glanced at Yuuri and smiled then looked back to Viktor. “I guess you’ve had some extra jogs to your memory on this topic lately.”  

Is… is Viktor trying to bribe his way in? He said once he submits his application as if it were already decided when Yuuri hadn’t said anything on the topic since they’d made up. Does he think that he couldn’t get in on his own?

Viktor looked at him with his usual bright smile, and Yuuri tried to return it. “Yes, dance has always been important to me, but it has been at the forefront of my mind as of late.”

The waiters returned with another dish of that icy lemon thing then followed that with glasses of calvados, the name again helpfully supplied by Viktor and some type of pastry folded to look like a four-petaled flower with a caramel sauce smeared across the plate underneath a small orb of ice cream.

“Kouigon Amann.” Viktor took the opportunity of leaning in close to inform him of what he was eating to kiss his cheek with his hand holding the other side. “It’s delicious. One of my favorites.”

Yuuri smiled and took a bite of the flaky, buttery, salty, caramelly pastry that had a pleasantly chewy exterior along with some of the sweet but tangy ice cream. “I can see why. It’s really good. I’m a little surprised. The food isn’t quite as fussy as I imagined it would be.”

Viktor smiled. “They have that too, but I don’t like playing games with my food. I’d rather it just be good. I’m glad you like it.” He kissed his cheek again then returned to his plate.

“So, Yuuri, what do you think of the Calvados?” Michele quizzed him while he swirled the glass of honey-colored liquor.

Calvados… he wracked his brain trying to remember which of the strange words Viktor had given him matched this one. His eyes lighted on the glass in his hand and he took a sip of his own. “Very appley.”

“Appley. How observant. It is made of apples. I should hope it would taste of them.”

Yurio smiled and tipped his glass to Yuuri. “Yuuri’s exactly right. That’s really all you need to know along with whether you like it or not. Only a pretentious ass would demand more.” He took a sip and grinned. “Very appley.”

“I don’t think it’s pretentious to have a wider understanding of the world around you. Having to limit oneself in a conversation with those who should remain as immiscible as their stations in life indicate is an experience in unrelenting banality.”  

Donatella turned to glare at her date. “Stop it, Mickey. You’re being an ass. Don’t pretend like you didn’t come from the same place I did. Why are you being so rude to Yuuri?”

“The key words there, dearest, are came from. I changed my station by working hard for it.”

“Oh? And you think-”

“Please stop. You don’t need to fight with your boyfriend over me. I’m fine.”

Donatella’s face screwed up in revulsion. “He’s my brother. My twin brother at that.”

Yuuri’s eyes widened in horror. “Oh my god. I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to insult you. I just thought…”

She smiled. “Don’t worry about it. You’re not the first to have thought that.”

“Nor are you the only one here tonight.” Yurio’s face nearly matched his but with a solid dose of revulsion alongside the horror. “I thought he was your boyfriend too.”

Otabek nodded in agreement next to him.

“Still, I’m very sorry. I don’t know why I misread that.”

“Really, Yuuri, don’t worry about it. I wasn’t insulted at all. I know you meant no harm.” She took a sip from her glass and smiled. “Very appley. I agree with Yuri over there. I’ve never understood the fuss over fancy wines. I either like it or I don’t.”

Yakov took a sip from his glass then held it up to study it. “It’s good. Very appley.” His gruff voice settled the matter as Liliya glanced at him with a small smile.   

Yuuri smiled shyly as he took another sip of his ‘appley’ wine. His eyes circled the table, each had stuck up for him or validated his opinion, as if he was an equal. Some of the tight knots in his chest eased.

“So Yuuri,” Michele set his glass down and leveled his gaze at him. “Viktor says you dance professionally as well. Do tell us where so we can come be dazzled as well.”

A red flush rose in Yuuri’s cheeks. His eyes dropped to his lap where he clenched his hands together. “Um…” His throat had dried, and he wasn’t sure he could answer through the nasty voice echoing in his brain. _A strip club. That’s where you dance. You’re just a slutty stripper. That's the only reason Viktor is with you. Slut. Whore..._

“It’s a place owned by his dance instructor.” Viktor placed his hand on Yuuri’s. “He performs every Friday night as the headline act.”

“There’s hardly an empty seat in the house.” Yurio jaw had a firm set to it. “Otabek, I should bring you next time I go.”

Otabek nodded at the suggestion. “Yeah, I’d love to.”

Yuuri clenched his fist. No. That voice is lying. It may not be glamorous or high end, but it was his art, his family, his home. “It’s called Yutopia, and we have the best burgers in all of Detroit.”

“That is a damn fact.” Yurio grinned. “I’ve tried them all. Hands down, the best.”

“Seconded,” Viktor said. “The best anywhere.”

Yuuri smiled and took a bite of the… “What did you say this was again?”

Viktor smiled at him. “Kouign Amann.”

“That’s right. Very good. Maybe we should put it on the menu.”

“You should. Though, it’s not nearly sweet enough to compete with you as a draw for the crowds.”

Yurio groaned and rolled his eyes. “Oh my god. You are the cheesiest idiot ever.”

They finished their dessert with only light banter across the table while Yuuri smiled and tried to keep that vicious voice at bay.

“Sweetling, shall we head out?” Viktor retrieved their coats from the young woman who’d taken them when they’d arrived and they all rode the elevator back down to the street level.

“It was very nice to finally meet you, Yuuri.” Liliya extended her hand and he gave it a quick shake this time. “I hope it won’t be the last time.”

While Yuuri puzzled over that last statement, Yakov patted his shoulder and gave him a short nod.

“It was great to have this time together, Yuuri.” Donatella grasped both of Yuuri’s hands in hers. “I wish...Well, I hope you never stop dancing.” She suddenly pulled him into a fierce hug. “I mean it. Dance.” She released him and handed Viktor a large white envelope then headed off to her waiting brother who still wore a scowl.

“Well, that was quite a dinner. You sure know how to pick a guest list, old man.” Yurio scuffed the toe of his shoe on the loose rocks on the sidewalk. “If you invite me again, I’m saying no.”

“Aw, it wasn’t that bad. And don’t worry; he’s not on the next invite.”

“Good. See you Monday, Katsuki.”

“See you, Yurio. Nice to meet you Otabek.” Yuuri waved at two of them as the headed off into the night.

The cold wind whipped up again, blowing Yuuri’s hair from its gelled form. A chill ran down his spine as icy fingers of the cold seeped through his jacket. A warm hand grasped his and Viktor pulled it up to his lips to kiss his knuckles. Viktor’s loving touch lent him strength against the voice still nipping the back of his mind. “Do you want to come back to my place?”

“I’d love to.” Viktor’s smile was warm and loving as he pulled Yuuri into his arms.

_Everything was beautiful at the ballet_   
_Raise your arms and someone's always there_   
_Yes, everything was beautiful at the ballet_

Yuuri headed to the kitchen when they arrived back at his place needing something to do with his hands. “Coffee or tea?”

“Coffee sounds good.” Viktor took off his jacket and draped it over the back of the sofa.

Yuuri put the coffee on to drip and ducked into the fridge for the creamer. “I got some of this sweet caramel creamer for you.”

Viktor smiled. “Does it come with your lips along with it too? That’s always my favorite.”

Yuuri poured two cups, putting the sweetened creamer in one and leaving his black. He smiled and leaned down for a kiss as he handed Viktor his.

Viktor smiled against the kiss and held it as they pulled back. “The best. Thank you.” He took a sip of his sweet coffee and smiled though it looked a bit off from his usual one.

He set his mug on the coffee table and noticed two large envelopes, one of which was eerily familiar.

“What are these, Viktor?” His heart gave a painful squeeze.

“Open this one.” He handed him one of the envelopes with a slight tremor in his hand.

Yuuri turned it over and saw the green letters, ‘Wayne State University’ printed strikingly clear on the white paper. His hands started to shake. “What is this, Viktor?”

“Please, Yuuri, just open it.”

He tossed it down on the coffee table and Viktor flinched. “I can’t believe you. I thought we’ve already been through this. I thought you said you were going to wait for me to decide. I haven’t decided yet, Viktor.”

“I know that, but Yuuri, you can’t make any other choice. Any choice but this one is the wrong one for you. I know it’s your life but-”

“You’re right. It is my life. This right here. This is my life.” He gestured to the humble space around him. “Am I not good enough for you? Is that it?” He started to pace across the hard floor. “You don’t want me if I’m going to stay right here dancing at Yutopia. You don’t want to have to defend me when you take me out to dinner. You don’t want to have to go to a slum to watch me dance and spend time with me. You don’t want to be dating a stripper. It’s the choice I have to make if I want to be with you, right? Because I just don’t fit into your life if I don’t.”

“No! Not at all, Yuuri! I swear I don’t see you that way at all! I never have!”

“Then why? Why is this the choice I _have_ to make, Viktor?”

“Because I don’t want you to regret that you never gave your dream a shot. You can be so much more than a part-time dancer. Don’t you see how much talent you have?”

“It’s not just talent, Viktor!” His body braced hard against the certain end he saw coming a long time ago as he froze in place. “Lilya said it herself; I’m too old for this! I lost my chance a long time ago! I wouldn’t even be graduating until I’m at the age most dancers start thinking about retirement! I can’t start a career that late and have any hope of making it! I made peace with that a long time ago and you just had to come in and rip that wound right open. You have no idea what it feels like to watch your dreams tick away by the minute. Every minute my window got narrower and narrower and I knew it and there was nothing I could do but watch. I was fine with it though. I wasn’t born in a place where dreams happen for anyone. That’s just my lot in life, but you can’t accept that. That’s not good enough for you.”

“It’s not good enough for you! And don’t tell me dreams don’t happen here because they do. You just saw it with Phichit so how can you tell me that they don’t happen?”

“He’s the one percent. Do you know how many kids I danced with who wanted to make it out just as badly as I did? I work with three of them.”

Viktor stood up and walked around the coffee table preparing for his exit. He stopped in front of him and grabbed the envelope Yuuri had tossed down. “Open the damn envelope, Yuuri! Can you do that much for me?” He shoved it back in his hands.

He took out the thick packet of papers and looked down at the offending pages that were filled out in Viktor’s distinct hand. He read the first section under training. “... world-renowned Minako Okukawa, recipient of Benois de la Danse…” He glanced at Viktor with his brow furrowed. “Headline performer six years running generating a three hundred and forty-six percent increase in revenue on average for the past four years…” He looked back at Viktor again, his heart racing, and softened his voice to a bare whisper. “What is this, Viktor?”

“It’s the truth. It’s your truth. It’s you. This is what has shaped you and what you’ve accomplished. This how I see you, how we all see you. It’s time you see yourself like this as well. Yuuri, what you need to do is not let go of your dreams. You need to let go of this image you’ve had of yourself and embrace who you really are and who you can be.”

“Viktor, I-”

“Before you answer, open this.” Viktor picked up the white envelope from the table and placed it in Yuuri’s hands.

He turned it over and pulled out its contents. A large glossy headshot of Donatella and a letter fell into his hands. The inscription in the corner read, ‘To Yuuri, my favorite dancer. Thank you for inspiring me for so many years. I wouldn’t be where I am without you giving me something to reach for. Don’t let Minako down. Keep dancing! Love, Sara.’ A memory clicked into place.

“Michele said his last name was Crispino, right?”

“Yes.”

“Then Donatella’s real name is Sara Crispino?”

“Yes.”

“I… I remember her. She was always hiding around the corner of the studio after I danced and I’d smile at her and she’d run away.” He smiled and pressed his hand to his mouth. “One time I caught her trying to do something I had done in class, but she didn’t have the right skills to do it yet, so I taught her something similar that she could do.”

Viktor smiled. “I know. She told me. She had a lot of memories of you. You do realize you were the boy she was talking about at dinner, right?”

“Me? She was talking about me?” He looked over the letter that was addressed to Liliya Baranovskaya and went on for a full page about how talented he was as a dancer and how he was a man with integrity who helped those around him achieve their goals and could be relied on to never let anyone down who put their faith in him. His heart throbbed erratically as he looked back at Viktor.

“Yuuri, if you can honestly tell me that you’re happy here without giving your dreams a shot, that you don’t see the tiniest crack in that window, and you’re one hundred percent content with that, then fine. I will stay with you proudly no matter where you are or what you do. I’ve never once been ashamed of you or even thought that was something I should feel. The only reason why I’m telling you to do this is that I saw you that day of Phichit’s performance and you were anything but okay. I couldn’t sit back and watch you suffer like that. I love you too much, Yuuri, to let you give up when I think that’s the last thing you want to do.”

Yuuri gathered the application splayed over the table and stuck the pages back in the envelope. He stared at it for a minute. “Your scholarship fund… You’re not…”

“No. I promised her that before I even met you. There are no strings attached to those funds. You just reminded me of my promise. Why would I even need to bribe them? You’re clearly talented enough on your own.”

The tension washed out of his body. He looked up and smiled. “You have any stamps? You forgot to put them on the envelope and I haven’t mailed anything I can hold in like forever.”

Viktor grinned. “What I have to do everything here? I thought you’d at least enjoy putting the stamps on yourself.”

He raised his eyebrow.

“Okay, fine. I forgot. But you do have to sign it. I considered forging it and just sending it in myself, but you needed to make that decision for yourself.” He pulled a pen out of his jacket pocket and handed it to him.

Yuuri sat down and pulled the papers back out to read them over again and check for any errors. Hesitating before pressing the tip to the paper, he took a deep breath and committed to his next step. The pen had such a satisfying drag as his name flowed onto the page. He tucked the papers back in along with the letter of recommendation and licked the envelope to seal it. “Will you send it for me?”

“Of course, but why?” He sat down to join him on the couch.

“If I hold onto it I might let that voice talk me out of it and… It feels kind of nice having you help me carry my dreams.”

Viktor pulled him close for a kiss. “You trust me with it? What if I forget the stamp?”

“You won’t.” He pulled Viktor back in for another kiss then left his forehead pressed against his. “Thank you for everything. I’m sorry I got mad at you for trying to help me.”

“I don’t care if you get mad at me. I expect that to happen on occasion. I’m just glad you didn’t run this time.”

“I’ll never run from you again.” He gave him another kiss, his hand holding his cheek. “Come on. Time to make one of your dreams come true.” He tugged him up from the couch. “You always wanted to be a dancer, right? Let me teach you.” He pulled out his phone and tapped it a few times. A few chords of piano played before a sultry female voice began to sing.

_Havana, ooh na-na_   
_Half of my heart is in Havana, ooh-na-na_   
_He took me back to East Atlanta, na-na-na_   
_All of my heart is in Havana_   
_There’s somthin’ in his manners_   
_Havana oh-na-na_

_-Havana by Camila Cabello_

Yuuri pulled Viktor close and put his hand around his waist. He slid his knee between Viktor’s and swiveled their hips together with the beat. He started to move them out into an open part of the apartment with a rocking salsa step. Never letting their bodies part even for a second, the need for this connection pulsed through both of them. Holding Viktor’s hand firmly, Yuuri spun him away and snapped him back, only to lower him into a dramatic dip. He held Viktor there for a moment, gazing into the darkened blue eyes, sweat beginning to bead on his forehead, chest heaving a bit. He kissed the front of his throat, exposed so delectably as his head tipped back, and Viktor shivered in his arms. He righted him and spun them around in a tight circle, chests still flush. Yuuri pulled Viktor’s hands up to his shoulders as he slid his hands down Viktor’s narrow waist. He licked a dirty open-mouthed kiss into Viktor’s mouth then turned in Viktor’s embrace and pressed his gyrating ass into his swiftly hardening cock. Viktor took this opportunity to get his hands on hips and did his best to move his in time with Yuuri’s seductive rhythm. He twirled back to face Viktor. Grabbing ahold of his tie, he tugged him close; sweat covered foreheads together, their mouths so close they were breathing the same air. Their lips collided, no longer able to resist each other.

Yuuri dragged him to the couch and pushed him down, straddling him and working his hips against him. “Sorry. I’ll have to finish your lesson another time.” He nipped at his neck as he worked to remove him from his clothes as quickly as he could. “You’re too irresistible.”

Viktor moaned and tugged at his shirt trying to remove it from his pants. “Teach me anytime you want, sweetling.” He pulled off Yuuri’s tie and opened his shirt to bite kisses over his chest. “I’ll be your willing student anytime you desire.”

“Talk like that and I’ll never make it to the end of a lesson.” He moved his hands to Viktor’s belt and lifted himself up just enough to let Viktor lift his hips and remove his pants and underwear from under him.

“Fine with me.” Viktor undid Yuuri’s belt and pulled it from the loops with a swift jerk, tossing it over the back of the couch. He divested him of his pants and boxers with one smooth motion. Yuuri let them pool at his ankles and stepped out of them.

Viktor tugged on Yuuri’s hips as he climbed back onto the couch straddling his lap on his knees. He gripped Viktor’s hair as he bent his head and swirled his tongue around the tip of Yuuri’s fully hard cock, licking off the precum that had begun to bead there. Yuuri gasped, arching his back at the sensation and rose up higher on his knees to give Viktor better access. Viktor kissed down the side of his cock and licked a slow drag up the underside that made him cry out and fill the towering space above them with his voice breaking in pleasure.

“Viktor!” Yuuri’s hand were now clutched tightly in Viktor’s silver locks, tugging slightly as he lost himself in the bliss of Viktor’s sinful tongue. “Viktor, the lube- ah!” Viktor had hollowed out his cheeks and begun to suck Yuuri’s cock in his mouth fully. “It’s, ah, in between, ah!... the cushions.”

Viktor removed one of his hands from Yuuri’s hips to rummage in between the cushions of the couch, keeping his other working over his cock.

He looked up with a playful smirk. “You dirty boy. You’ve been planning this here?” His tongue teased at the head of his cock.

He tugged Viktor’s head back and looked down at him, his eyes dark. “I’ve been dreaming of fucking you over every inch of this apartment since the day I moved in. I’ve been planning on fucking you on every surface twice since the day it became possible.”

“Oh, Yuuri.” He took him back in his mouth making him cry out as he found the small tube, pulled it out and popped the cap open. He squeezed a generous amount down the crack of Yuuri’s ass, causing him to yelp from the sudden cold of the slick liquid. He used both hands to begin opening up Yuuri’s hole alternating his forefingers of both hands, adding a third to further the stretch.

Yuuri was whimpering, flushed and writhing on Viktor’s lap. “Hurry, Vitya! I’m ready! I need you!”

He pulled off Yuuri’s cock with a lewd pop. “We don’t have a condom? Are you gonna be okay with that?”

“Yes, please,” he whined breathlessly in the craving tearing him open and leaving him begging for Viktor to fill it.

Viktor lined himself up with Yuuri and guided him down onto his cock. Yuuri lowered himself down slowly, giving a satisfied moan when he bottomed out. Viktor pressed his hips upward with a deep moan. “Oh my god. You feel so good.” He pressed his forehead against Yuuri’s chest then looked up, his eyes burning. “You look glorious, sweetling.” Cupping Yuuri’s face in his hands, he kissed him deeply as Yuuri lifted himself up and dropped back down causing his cock to bounce against Viktor’s stomach.

Shifting the angle of his hips, Yuuri began to bounce with vigor, hitting his sweet spot with each movement. His hands gripped the couch behind Viktor’s head, his fingers digging in hard to give himself something to hold on to. Viktor’s lips and tongue over his nipples sent even more pleasure coursing through his already overstimulated body.

“Viktor, close, love. My love, soo close.” His hands moved from the couch to Viktor’s shoulders bracing himself against Viktor’s solid strength.

“Let it go, sweetling. I want to see you let it all go.” Viktor began to thrust up and meet Yuuri’s downward movements. “Come for me.” Viktor took Yuuri’s cock in hand, giving it a few sharp tugs. Yuuri let his head fall back and surrendered to the bliss of the orgasm that ripped through him. He came hard, digging his blunt nails into the flesh of Viktor’s shoulders who cried out with own orgasm that splashed hotly deep inside of him. He collapsed against Viktor’s chest trying to catch his breath as he came down from the blissed-out state.

Viktor gave a satisfied chuckle that rumbled in his chest. “These lessons are amazing!”

“Agreed. Should we make it a weekly thing?”

“Only weekly? I want a lot more than weekly. You’re so addictive, Yuuri.” He kissed over his shoulder.

“I’m sure we can work something out.”

They sat quietly, still connected, wrapped in each other’s arms and breathing in each other’s heartbeats until the air around them grew cool.

Viktor pulled the afghan from the back of the couch and wrapped it around Yuuri’s shoulders that were starting to develop gooseflesh. “Shall we retire to the shower and get ourselves cleaned up for bed?”

He nodded against Viktor’s chest. “Carry me?” The request was whispered against Viktor’s skin.

“Anything for you, sweetling.” Viktor put his finger under Yuuri’s chin to look him in the eyes. “I love you.” He gently kissed Yuuri’s mouth.

“I love you, too.” Yuuri returned the sentiment with his lips returning Viktor’s sweet kisses.

Viktor picked him up and carried him to the bathroom. They showered together, gently cleaning each other, exchanging kisses instead of words. They took turns drying each other off then fell into Yuuri’s bed, a tangle of arms and legs not knowing where one began or where one ended, just contented to be together fully connected now with no unanswered questions or foreign tongues. They were home.

_Up a steep and very narrow stairway_   
_It wasn't paradise, but it was home_

_\- At the ballet from A Chorus Line_


	10. It’s buried down inside.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> *Queues training montage*

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ***Edited 2/6/18***
> 
> Clarinda: So late again but we upped the chapter count! This was originally supposed to be the end, but 5100+ words into this and only halfway through what we planned...We decided on a shorter, more bite-sized chapter that was only a day late would be better than a monster we rushed through for time sake. There is now art!! Also, Spicy Katsudon Alert!! If you want to skip start speed reading at "I love abstract art" and slow down at "I guess, I owe you a new rug." Please leave kudos and comments, they make my partner in crime so very happy (and me too!) Share if you enjoy! ヽ(o♡o)/
> 
> D_Toska: If you like Clarinda's art could you please take a second to like/reblog on [Tumblr](http://megsotaku.tumblr.com/post/170572703126/youre-ready-by-clarinda-this-was-done-for) if you have one? Thank you guys for your feedback! As most creators can agree, we live for feedback.
> 
>  

_Crying eyes, broken bells_  
_Back in course, no one tells_  
_Down we go, wish me well_  
_I don't know where we fell_

 _I wanna wake up where your love is_  
_'Cause your love is always waking mine_  
_I wanna break down where your heart gets_  
_So torn it's almost breaking mine_  
_I wanna lay here, lost and bitter_  
_So long, I feel like I could die_  
_I wanna tell you what my truth is_  
_But it's buried down inside_

The soft waves of snow drifts twinkled in the mid-morning sun around the bench where Yuuri sat waiting for Viktor and Makkachin. Vicchan had wound himself and his lead around the legs of the bench and had begun to yip at his vacant owner. In his nervous fingers, he flipped a large manila envelope.

Viktor walked up with Makkachin bounding against her lead in her rush to greet her friends. He struggled to keep her contained without spilling the coffee cups in his hands or dropping the brown bag he was carrying. “Good morning, sweetling! I come bearing gifts! That is if my rude Makka doesn’t ruin them before I can get it to you.” He looked down with a stern face. “Bad, Makkachin! No pulling.”

As usual, Makkachin ignored him, and Viktor gave up his attempt at obedience and just walked faster to keep up.

“Oh, Viktor! When did you get here?” He smiled absently and set the envelope on the bench next to him. He then noticed the state his poodle had gotten himself into and began to untangle the mess.

“Just arrived, actually.” He gazed fondly at the scene unfolding before him.

Yuuri rubbed his hands together now that he’d freed Vicchan from his mess. He couldn’t believe that he’d spaced out so long that he had failed to notice the state his dog had gotten himself into. He unhooked him from the leash to go frolick with Makkachin in the snow drifts inside the park fence. His eyes ticked back to the envelope on the bench. It had arrived two days ago, sitting ominously in his mailbox. He had a pretty good idea of what it contained but hadn’t wanted to face it just yet and most definitely didn’t want to open it alone. Thus, it had been eating away at his nerves since.

“So, what’s in the envelope?”

“Um, it’s the audition packet. The confirmation email I received after you mailed in my application said it would be arriving in the mail within the week.” Yuuri picked it up again and began to spin it again, his fingers betraying the frantic energy that had begun to flutter through his whole body. “And here it is.”

Viktor took a sip of his coffee and took a long look at him. “How long has that been sitting in your hands unopened?”

“It wasn’t in my hands. It was in the mailbox.” He tried for a smile at his joke, but Viktor just raised his eyebrows. He sighed. “Since Thursday.”

“So, do you want me to open it for you?”

Yuuri’s eyes finally lifted and met Viktor’s with a pleading expression. “Yes, please.” He thrust the terrifying envelope into his hands.

Viktor quickly pulled open the top of the offending object and pulled out its contents. With a dramatic throat clearing, he began to read the cover letter. “Dear Mr. Katsuki, We would like to thank you for your application to the Dance Program at Wayne State University...” He looked up at Yuuri. “Do you want me to read this entire letter to you?”

“No. Just tell me which circles of hell I’ll be visiting. Are they doing an interview? If so, when? Please don’t let it be on stage before I dance.” His eyes screwed shut.

Viktor’s eyes scanned the page. “Okay...here it is! ‘You’ll have a brief interview before the prepared dance portion of the audition.’”

“Oh no. Oh god no.” He covered his face with his empty hand and draped his other arm holding the coffee over the top of his face as he hunched over buried deep into his lap and tried to hold onto his heaving lungs.

Viktor’s hand ran gently over his back. “You’ll be fine, Yuuri. I’ll help you prepare. It’s just talking to a few people. You can totally handle that. It says here they just want to know about lead you to dance and what you’re passionate about. They just want to know you.”

“Yeah, they want to know where I’ve been dancing and where I’ve been training, and I have to stand up there and say that I’ve been a burlesque dancer for the past six years!”

“There is no shame in that Yuuri. You headlined your own dance review. You choreograph your own routines. How many other dancers applying do you think can say the same? You got paid to do what you loved. Come on. Sit up and look me in the eye and tell me you’re a burlesque dancer like it’s the proudest part of your life.”

Yuuri looked over just enough to peek up and squint at him. “Later. Tell me the rest of the circles I’ll be visiting first.”

“Well, there are two portions in the morning block, which includes a class where you will be expected to learn a portion of choreography and be able to replicate it by the end of class then an improvised dance before the committee. ‘We want to see what applicants can come up with on a moments notice and how they think outside of the box.”

“Improvised? In what style? Ballet? Modern? Jazz? Tell me they said something other than improvised!”

Viktor scanned the page again. “Nope. Just says ‘improvised.’ But it doesn’t matter what style of dance. You’ve done just about all of the popular ones, and if they decide to throw a wrench at you, you’ll nail it better than the rest of them. I know what a ballet dancer looks like so I know what those other applicants are going to look like. You aren’t a thing like them, and I mean that in the best way. Dance is all about creativity and expression, and you have those in spades. You’ll nail it, Yuuri. I’m certain of that.”

Chewing on his bottom lip, he considered what Viktor had said. Every time he put together a dance, it was always a mix of styles, whatever served the music and the story he wanted to tell. There had even been a few instances that he’d had to change what he’d worked on in the moment because of the mood of the room. A small smile pulled at his lips as he remembered how he’d whipped the room into a near frenzy during the New Year’s party this year when he’d pulled Viktor on stage and replicated their intimate dance to “Havana.”  

“So that’s it.” Letting out a heavy sigh, Yuuri took back the packet of papers back and looked at the cover letter. “It says it’s in three weeks. That should be enough time for me to put something together, overthink it and change it at least a hundred times.” He stuffed the mass back into the envelope they arrived in and leaned his head on Viktor’s shoulder and watched the dogs romp in the snow.

“I’ll be here to help in any way I can. I’m so sure you can do this, I’m going to take you wherever you want to go in the world as a reward for getting in. Name the place, Yuuri. I mean it.” He put his arm around Yuuri’s shoulder and squeezed him close.

A light smirk played on his face. “I’ve heard Paris is lovely in the spring.”

Viktor laughed and pulled out his phone. “Done. I love Paris.”

“Wait. You’re serious?”

“I told you I was serious, silly.” He tapped his phone and looked over with a playful grin. “Already purchased the tickets. I’ll book the hotel when I get home.”

Standing up abruptly, Yuuri stared down at Viktor. “You can’t do this! You don’t even know if I’ll get in!”

“I can do this. I just did do this. And I know you’ll get in. And if you don’t? I’ll take you to Paris anyway. But that’s not going to happen. You’ll see.” A satisfied smile settled on his face as he crossed his arm over his chest in a ‘Watch me’ pose.

Yuuri almost stamped in frustration. He balled up his fists and ground his teeth to keep his biting comments to himself trying to remind himself that his sudden irritation at such a beautiful gesture was just his anxiety making him overreact.

Viktor grabbed him by the waist and tugged him down into his lap making him squeal in surprise. He put his arm behind his head to dip him back and hold him tight through a kiss until the tension drained from Yuuri’s body and his kiss melted into tender acceptance. Viktor pulled back and brushed his hand over his face, pushing his hair out of the way. “You’ll get in. You need to have as much faith in your abilities as I do.”

Yuuri gave a small nod and pulled Viktor in for another kiss. With the comforting reminder that Viktor was by his side no matter what happened, the nervous tremor that had been present since the letter had arrived began to release its hold on his body.

 _Shining light, show and tell_  
_Don't be scared, truth is hell_  
_Down we go, wish me well_  
_No one knows where we fell_

 _Oh, I had a dream that you couldn't hear me screaming_  
_Trying to tell you everything but it wouldn't stop you leaving_  
_I wanna wake up where your love is_  
_'Cause your love is always waking mine_  
_I wanna break down where your heart gets_  
_So torn it's almost breaking mine_  
_I wanna lay here, lost and bitter_  
_So long, I feel like I could die_  
_I wanna tell you what my truth is_  
_But it's buried down inside_

“Again!” The sharp crack of Minako’s command beat at the last of his strength.

Sweat poured down his back as he leaned over the barre to catch his breath. He may have been dancing professionally for the last six years, but he hadn’t subjected himself to one of Minako’s ‘sessions’ since he was in high school. Sure, they’d train to make sure his form was still was what it should be, reinforcing the years of formal classes she’d had him take, but her ‘sessions’ as she affectionately called them, were non-stop boot camp style classes where they’d drill the choreography over and over until he could do it even without music or counts. His body would just move, no thought required, no chance for the nerves to get the better of him with the dance embedded into the fibers of his muscles.

“Hold on, Minako.” He braced on his knees heaving. “I need a break.” He turned back from his favorite position overlooking Viktor’s usual spot to look back where the black backdrop had been ripped open at the back of the stage exposing the guts behind the magic. Random pieces of sound equipment piled in one corner. Boxes overflowing with sequined costumes spilled over the floor like a unicorn had vomited his nerves backstage with more racks of costumes hanging to the side. And at the center of the chaos was a dusty old mirror and a barre worn from thousands of hands gripping hard through millions of drops of sweat and tears. He staggered over to an old amplifier that probably didn’t even work anymore and plopped down to take a huge swig from his water bottle.  

“Aww, you big baby.” Minako walked over and squatted down in front of his perch. “You used to be able to do this all morning and not even get winded. You’ve gotten soft.” She poked one long finger into his stomach, which was anything but soft.

“Ah!” he scoffed. “I have not!” He lifted up his shirt and poked at his stomach. “See? Hard as a rock. You could bounce a quarter off these abs!”

“Maybe gravel. You’re sloppy and all weak through your core. You may have pretty muscles, but you know it’s those inner muscles that do the work. Those have gone soft.” She pointed her finger at him and squinted. “And don’t you dare try to deny that one.”

He sighed. “Fine. Maybe a little.”

“Alright then! Let’s get this body back in shape!” She bounced up to her feet. “Up! Up! Up!”

“One more second.” He grabbed his phone and sent a text to Viktor.

‘Minako says I’m weak and flabby’

His phone swished seconds later. ‘LIES! You have the body of an Adonis! Give her the phone. I’ll let her have a piece of my mind.’

He smiled to himself. ‘That’s not necessary. I already feel better. Thank you!（￣ε￣＠’

‘Love you! Love you so much, Yuuri!ヽ(o♡o)/ You’re going to kill it!’

‘Maybe if Minako doesn’t kill me first’

‘I’ll be waiting at your place with food and lotion to massage your feet when you’re done!’

‘Best boyfriend ever!’

‘(♡´艸`)’

“So, how is lover boy?” Minako put her hand on her hip and smirked.

Yuuri blushed as he looked up and smiled. “He’s good. Awesome. Incredible. Perfect.”

“Wow, so just good?”

“Shut it.” Yuuri tipped his water back and took another long pull of the cool liquid.

“Alright softy, Allez!”

“Yes, mistress.”

 _They say that secrets make you sick and I should know_  
_Just promise me that if I tell you, you will go_  
_Oh, oh, oh_

Viktor paused his foot massage to grab the bottle of wine from next to the empty Chinese food cartons on the coffee table and topped off their glasses. Yuuri sighed deeply as the aches and tension melted further from his body, and he settled back onto the pillow Viktor had propped behind him, taking a sip of his wine and closing his eyes as Viktor’s hands went back to his foot.

“Mr. Katsuki?”

“Hai!”

“Have you had any experience in a leadership role?”

Viktor had been feeding him questions all through dinner in between bites of sweet and sour chicken and pork fried rice. Having done his own fair share of employee interviews, he put on his professional persona and tried his best to poke and prod at Yuuri’s brain.

“Um-”

“No um’s, Yuuri. Just pause if you need to think. Don’t fill it with useless words.”

“Right.” He’d already told him that a hundred times but he said it just as patiently on the hundred and second as he did on the first. “... I would sometimes teach the younger classes in my ballet studio. And I often helped my classmates when they were struggling with a difficult section of choreography.”

“Very good, Yuuri. That was a perfect answer.”

“I think my interviewer may be biased.” He moaned deeply as Viktor hit a new aching spot in his foot.

“I am a paragon of objectivity. I am insulted that you suggest otherwise.” He sniffed indignantly. Then with a mischievous smile, he paused in his massage to tickle the back of Yuuri’s knee, his weakest spot.

“Stop!” Yuuri laughed as he tried to pull his leg from Viktor’s grasp.

“Apologize!”

He writhed while trying not to splash his wine out of his glass. “Sorry!”

“I don’t think you're sincere.” He continued his gentle torture.

“I’m so sorry!” Yuuri shouted as tears began to gather in his eyes.

Viktor finally ceased his attack and picked up his glass from the table and took a genteel sip of his own wine. “Shall we continue or do you want to continue to question my ethics?”

“Next question, please.”

“Okay then,” he leaned over to put his glass back down and resumed his massage, “on your application it says that you’ve been working as a professional dancer for the past six years. Can you please elaborate on that experience?”

He flinched. The worst of the questions. He knew Viktor was just trying to let him work out the answer here where he felt safe and loved no matter what he said, but the answer was still painful to give. It wasn't that he was ashamed of himself or what he did, but he knew the looks people gave when he answered that question honestly, and that judgment ate at his confidence. ”I… I was- I am a burlesque dancer. I have a show every Friday night at a local bar. I choose the music and choreograph all of my routines which change every week.” He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “I guess it’s been pretty successful-”

“No guessing. You know this for a fact.”

“Right.” He closed his eyes and took another sip of wine. “It’s been very successful, and I hold the record for the most customers brought in during my portion of the show, and I’ve kept that consistently from the start until now.”

“Excellent, Yuuri. That was a perfect response again. See? You can absolutely do this.”

He shook his head. “You have no idea how bad my anxiety gets in situations like this. Dance is hard enough, and that’s already going to give me a huge case of stage fright and then this… I could never do class presentations without turning into a complete and utter mess and feeling sick for hours afterward. By the time I was a junior, I would take a zero instead of doing the presentation. I may be able to do this here, but not there.”

Viktor’s face crumbled in his helpless search to find the right words to fix him. “Yuuri, you’re perfect here. You don’t have to be perfect there. If you only do half as well as you do here, you’ll be just fine. This isn’t going to be the make it or break it part. I don’t think they’re going to reject you for being not so good at public speaking.”

“A dancer is supposed to have presence and confidence. How can they see that in a person who can’t even answer a few simple questions?”

“Easy. You’ll show them in your dance. You just show them that even if you’re absolutely pathetic when it comes to interviews, you’re still an amazing dancer that will knock their socks off with dancing like they’ve never seen before.”  

“I guess.” Yuuri contemplated the contents of his wine glass as his thoughts warred between hope and self-loathing. Huffing audibly, he prodded Viktor with his toe. “Next question.”

“What or who would you say was your inspiration?”

“Well, when I was a little kid, I didn’t really have an inspiration to dance. I just did it because it’s all I’ve ever known. I can’t remember a time in my life without dance. When I got older, I’d say my inspiration was a desire to get out and see the world. I have a best friend who also shared the same dream for his figure skating, and we’d talk for hours about the sights we could see and the things we could bring to the world from our own little humble piece of it. But then that dream died for me, but I still kept dancing just because I loved it. I guess you could say my inspiration then was myself. I did it for the joy it brings me to express myself the way I know best. Now… now that dream I had to bring my dance outside of my tiny piece of the world was brought back to life by a man who loves me more than I ever knew it was possible to love another. Now I dance for him, and he’s my inspiration to make myself into everything he sees in me. I don’t want to let him down. I want to make him proud of me, and I know he already is, but I want him to know that his love changed my life. This is the best way I can show him that.”

He looked up at Viktor, who had stopped rubbing his feet. His deep blue eyes shone with tears. Viktor dropped his foot and pounced on him, gathering him in his arms. Viktor’s lips slammed into his with joy and fervor, all tongues and teeth, with very little coordination. The kiss deepened as hands grasped at shirts, tugging and pulling to find the flesh underneath. Their hands searched for belts and zippers without breaking the contact of lips and tongues.

“Wait, wait. Need…” He arched up into Viktor as his body protested his words of restraint. “Need to put the glass down.” He stretched over toward the coffee table. Before all of his years spent training his coordination could kick in, he was slipping off the couch and grabbing Viktor to save himself only succeeding in pulling him down on top of him and sending the wine glass rolling away from the deep stain it left on the rug.

They paused as the hard thunk rattled through them then Yuuri used his now free hand to continue ripping away Viktor’s clothes.

“Wait, the rug,” Viktor mumbled through their kiss as he grabbed Yuuri’s shirt and pulled it up.  

“I love abstract art. Now shut up and get my clothes off.”

He lifted up his chest so Viktor could oblige then his hips to let his pants come away as well. Viktor shimmied out of the rest of his clothes and crashed back into their kiss, pulling him harder into him. Viktor started kissing his way down his body, and Yuuri tugged at his thigh to bring him around. Viktor reached his cock and wrapped his mouth around it, sinking it deep into his throat in one move. Yuuri gasped hard and clung to Viktor’s hips as he dragged his tongue down the underside of Viktor’s deliciously thick cock. He licked around his head as he took him into his mouth and relaxed his throat to give him full access. Viktor moaned, and his head dropped to rest against Yuuri’s thigh for a moment before he resumed his swirling pleasure along his pulsing cock.

Viktor started with gentle thrusts that gained speed as Yuuri encouraged him with his hands pressing into his ass. He went dizzy with the blinding pleasure of having Viktor flooding him at both ends. He pressed harder into Viktor and slapped his ass to encourage him to use him for his pleasure. He loved the feeling of Viktor losing his restraint because of the pleasure his body gave him. Viktor thrust harder as he sucked him harder in return and his eyes rolled back in his head as his entire body clenched down to his toes. Muffled moans floated around them indistinguished from each other, just one combined symphony of sloppy bliss.

Viktor paused to wet a finger then slipped it inside his hole to stroke his sweet spot as he resumed his ministrations sending him further into that ecstatic void they joined in with nothing but themselves and the pleasure of their connection. He slapped Viktor’s ass again to release that last bit of restraint he held, and Viktor gave way, fucking into his mouth and spilling deep inside his throat. Viktor pulled out, and he swallowed down everything Viktor gave him. Viktor stroked his finger faster over that perfect spot as he sucked him to within an inch of his life. An orgasm sparked then roiled through him, twisting and turning his limbs into an erratic, primal dance.

Viktor collapsed down as his elbows and knees went into a gelatinous state, resting his head on Yuuri’s thigh as he wiped his mouth, their breath slowing as their bodies cooled.

“I guess, I owe you a new rug, huh?”

“No. I love the rug even more now.”

Viktor laughed. “What about when people come over and see the stain? You gonna tell them how it happened?”

“Proudly. In great detail.”

He laughed again. “You lie.”

“Maybe a little. I think the sheepish face would give me away though.”

“It totally would. You give away everything with those blushes.”

“I blushed every time you came near me for years, and you never noticed.”

“Well, it is pretty hot there. How would I know the difference between you blushing from the heat and you blushing because you were completely in love with me?” He grinned and worked his fingers lightly over his side making him squeal before seeking forgiveness with a kiss to his thigh.

“I don’t know. Yurio figured it out though.”

Viktor regained some strength and turned around to cuddle him in his arms. “He knew you liked me?”

“Yeah. He called me out on it right before you came to my show.”

“Really? Huh.” His face creased with thought. “He invited me to your show. Practically dragged me there. Do you think he was trying to set us up?”

“The world will never know. You really think he’d admit it if he was?”

“Yeah. You’re right. He’d never fess up to something like that. We’ll just have to send him a nice fruit basket in thanks.”

He nodded. “Make sure it’s a good one. He deserves it.”

“The biggest. I love that little punk.”

“Our fairy godmother is an angry little kitten.”

At this image, they dissolved into fits of laughter. “I think we should probably get up off the floor. Shower?”

“Only if you join me.” A coy smile graced Yuuri’s features.

“Do we get to play some more in the shower?” His eyes lit up with excitement.

“You do need a little more work on your technique.”

“Yeah, and I think there are a few surfaces in there we haven’t used yet.”

“Oh yeah? Which ones? I remember the side wall and the bench.”

“There’s still the vanity and the floor…”

“Oh yeah, and the back wall.”

“Let’s go. I’ll race you there. Loser has to bottom!” He scrambled to his feet and sprinted for the shower.

Yuuri jumped up after him. “Cheater! You’re supposed to say ready set go first!”

 _Oh, I had a dream that you couldn't hear me screaming_  
_Trying to tell you everything but it wouldn't stop you leaving_

 _I wanna wake up where your love is_  
_'Cause your love is always waking mine_  
_I wanna break down where your heart gets_  
_So torn it's almost breaking mine_  
_I wanna lay here, lost and bitter_  
_So long, I feel like I could die_  
_I wanna tell you what my truth is_  
_But it's buried down inside_

“Yuu-ri!” Minako snapped his name in half with her claps as she always did when she was irritated with him. “If you don’t get that damn leg up, I’m going to tie it up there for the next half an hour!”

“I can’t!” he wailed. “I just can’t get it there! I’m trying.” He dropped his leg and slouched on his feet.

She sighed and walked over. “You’re all tense. What’s bugging you?”

“You mean other than the painfully obvious? The painfully obvious. It’s tomorrow!”

“Yeah, and you’ve worked your ass off. Come on. You can do this. Stand up and get your leg up.” She clapped again to send him into action.

He rose up on his toes and lifted his leg behind him as he reached one arm overhead and the other extended to the side, his whole body turned into one built-in torture device ripping at his joints as he tried to find the impossible angles.

Minako placed her hand on his chest and ran it down the bend of his stomach and to his raised thigh. “Relax here. You need to give if you want it to reach. You can’t just wind yourself up into a knot and hope for elegance. You have to know what to contract and what needs to let go.”

Dropping down to first position, Yuuri took a deep breath and closed his eyes. He shook his hands out and took another steadying breath. He began to clear his mind of the swirl that had constantly been churning since Viktor had opened the audition letter. He rose back up again feeling the stretch as his leg went up and he breathed into it feeling the release through the stretching curve and the sudden strength in the hollow of the arch as those muscles no longer needed to fight the ones opposing them. He held his core just strong enough to keep his stability, but let as much tension out of his body as he could and that elusive lightness he chased washed over him. He turned and looked up at his raised hand and felt the perfect bend of his body and the room to give even more. He moved into the extra space and felt the fine lines traversing his body between weightless, effortless give and the sturdy draw of strength. He smiled and released the position slowly, floating back to the ground.

Minako smiled and gave her approving nod. “See, I knew you still had it in you. Now, you’re ready.”

He looked up at her face that shone with pride, and he felt for the first time since this whole process began that he might actually be able to do this. “Thanks, Minako. Not just for this but, well, for everything.” He fidgeted with the hem of his damp t-shirt. “I would have never made it this far without Mari’s support and especially yours. You literally dropped everything to take care of us. You sold your dream to put a roof over our head and food on the table. You kept training me even before I could even begin to pay you back by dancing at the bar. So, well thanks.” He swallowed and gave her a small smile.

Minako crossed over and pulled him into a quick hug. “I didn’t sell my dream. My dream was always to see all of my years of training given to those who deserve it and can carry on my legacy. When your parents died, and all of our hearts broke, I needed to do something different. I didn’t have enough left in me to give it to everyone anymore, so I decided that you were the one I wanted to give it all to. I’ve always believed in you, and I knew that you would find your own way. You just need to find your light. I’m glad you found someone else who can push you in ways I never could.”

“Minako.” His eyes wavered before he burst into tears and buried his head against her thin, strong shoulder. “Thank you. I’ll find a way to repay you.” She pulled him in for a tight hug this time, rubbing his back in soothing circles.

“No, you don’t. You deserve all the happiness life has to offer. I’m glad I’ve been able to see you grow up to be such an accomplished young man. That in itself is payment enough. Don’t you dare try to give me a single dime.” She ruffled his sweaty head. She stepped back as Yuuri dried his eyes on the sleeve of his shirt. “Alright now that you got your head out of your ass, we might be able to get something done. I think at least a dozen more run-throughs will get you there.”  

“Urgh! I take it all back! You’re the devil!”

She grinned and clapped her hands. “Five, six, seven, eight!”

 _It's buried down inside_  
_-Dream by Bishop Briggs_

 

 


	11. Now, I'm Dancing for My Life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> D-day or Yuuri has to show them what he's made of.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Clarinda:＼（Ｔ∇Ｔ）／ It's finished!!! (Just a warning and an apology cause these note will probably run long) This was my very first fic, and I loved it so much. I'm blessed that Aliferous_Sin came into my life and helped me with this project. At first, it was just as a beta then she added so much depth to this shallow story that it became as much her story as mine. THANKS, BOO!!!ヽ(o♡o)/ Also, want to thank Paxton1976 who was the one who thought this was a good idea and that I should write it. To all of you who've stopped in and read this, a huge thank you!! This it, bitches!! See you in the next fic!!! (∩^o^)⊃━☆゜.*
> 
> D_Toska: Stopping back in for this final chapter to share my thoughts. (Shut up, social anxiety. I don't wanna hear from you. Yes, I know I can just let Clarinda speak for both of us again. I don't wanna.) I'm so grateful Clarinda asked for my eyes on this fic then invited me to join her full blast cause that's exactly what it's been- a blast. I love this fic and writing with her. It's so rare to find someone you just click with, but I think this fic is evidence of just how well our minds can meld and how much we push each other to grow. Thanks, boo!!! You up for some more plotting? (ʃƪ¬‿¬) We've got a thriller to write. Thanks also to everyone who read and supported this story! I hope you enjoy the (very delayed. Forgive us. (シ_ _)シ ) final chapter! Please share your thoughts. We'd love to hear 'em!

_Falling too fast to prepare for this_  
_Tripping in the world could be dangerous_  
_Everybody circling, it's vulturous_  
_Negative, nepotist_  
_Everybody waiting for the fall of man_  
_Everybody praying for the end of times_  
_Everybody hoping they could be the one_  
_I was born to run, I was born for this_

Yuuri shivered against the cold wind that snaked its way through his coat as he stepped off the bus, his foot sinking into dirty snow that now lined the curbs of the street. He looked up at the stone facade of the building where the audition was to be held and took a deep breath. The stream of mist pouring from his mouth stuttered a bit as his nerves rattled his chest. Viktor had begged him to let him drive him to the audition, but he had refused, placating him with a promise to meet up afterward. He needed to face this alone.

He willed his feet forward and climbed the imposing steps and entered the marble-lined lobby. The room was nearly filled with dancers milling about the edges of the room some chatting amongst themselves and others stretching while eyeing the competition. At the end of the lobby sat a rather bored looking young man at a table who looked like he’d rather be anywhere but in a room full of hyped up dance students. Yuuri made his way through the crowd to the table.

“Name?”

“Um, Yuuri Katsuki.” He fiddled with hems of his sleeves as he watched the man scan the list before him.

“Okay, initial here.” He pointed at a space next to his name. “You’ll be in room three for your group dance, and you’ll remain with that group for the improv portion though there will be a break between them of an undetermined length. You’ll be given an hour for lunch and rest. You’ll then be called in to do your interview on the main stage then present your prepared dance.” His voice and inflection made it clear he’d recited this many times. “Here is your number. Don’t lose it. You will not be able to get another.” He handed him a small square sticker with the number 1225 on it. “Please wait with the others until your room number is called."

He nodded his head in thanks and found a piece of wall that was mostly empty and sat down and put his headphones in. He rummaged around in his duffle bag and pulled out a pair of beat up, black leather ballet shoes. There were worn bits around the toes, and the tanned leather on the sole under the ball of the foot had been worn to near nothing. They were the last pair he’d bought over six years ago; a lifetime ago. Yanking off his sneakers and socks, he slipped the well-worn dance shoes on. He flexed his toes in the soft interior, letting his feet stretch and contract, releasing the tension.

He spread his legs out to the sides, opening his hips gently, keeping his toes pointed and following the lines of his legs. Sliding his hands forward along the tiles, he leaned forward between his legs then rested his head on the cool floor while he waited for his muscles to give, wishing he could coax his mind into doing the same. The light tingle of release ran down his inner thighs, and he came up for a moment then went down again to push the stretch further this time bringing his legs slightly behind the straight line. His cheek rested on the floor, and he closed his eyes breathing deeply as the tiles under him seemed to shift from smooth flat planes to the tiny hexagons in the bathroom where he’d huddled with his family so long ago as they waited for the tornadoes to end.

_“Mama, I’m scared.”_

_His mom’s soft arms enveloped nearly his entire body. “It’s okay, Yuuri-chan. Everything’s going to be just fine. Storms always pass. We’re just going to sit right where we are, and it’ll pass right over us. Everything’s going to be fine.”_

_“It’s hard to breathe. My lungs won’t work right.”_

_“It’s okay. Just sit right here with us, and we’ll keep you safe. I promise.” She rubbed slow circles on his back as she kissed the top of his head. “When there’s a storm, all you have to do is wait, and it will pass. And waiting’s easy, right?”_

_“No,” he pouted. “I hate just sitting here. My chest hurts, and I feel like crying.”_

_“What if you dance? Will that make you feel better; do you think?”_

_He glanced up at her from the knees tucked to his chest. “Maybe. But how can I dance if I can’t breathe right?”_

_“I don’t know, baby. Why don’t you just try it and see if it works? I love watching you dance, so I’d love to see it if you think you can try.”_

_He nodded. “Okay. I’ll try.”_

_He stood up and started a tiny dance in the little patch of tiles not taken up by the sink or the tub or his family. He twirled and bumped into the sink, but his mom just smiled and waited for him to continue. He raised his arms and hopped, trying to twist his little, uncoordinated body around, and landed facing the door then turned back around to see his family applauding him with big smiles on their faces. Even Mari, who loved to pick on him and would usually mock him for such a thing, was beaming. He gave a tiny bow and cuddled next to his mom’s side again._

_He looked up and smiled. “Thanks, Mama. I do feel better.”_

_“Wonderful. I’m so glad you found what makes you happy again when you’re scared. So, next time there’s a storm you’ll know what to do. Just wait it out and dance to keep the fear away.”_

_He nodded. “Yeah. I’ll do that.”_

A tear slipped down his cheek, and he quickly wiped it away as he came back up out of the stretch. He worked the rest of his legs and moved on to his core, breathing deep into each stretch, feeling himself begin to center as he moved on to his chest then finally his arms and neck.

 _Whip, whip_  
_Run me like a racehorse_  
_Pull me like a ripcord_  
_Break me down and build me up_  
_I wanna be the slip, slip_  
_Word upon your lip, lip_  
_Letter that you rip, rip_  
_Break me down and build me up_

He stood carefully and bounced on his toes, moving his arms in circles to warm up his blood and muscles now that he’d thoroughly stretched. He’d kept the volume on his music low to ensure he’d be able to hear when his room number was called, but this also let in some of the chatter around him, and it chafed over his already aching mind.

A blue dance bag was tossed onto the floor near his. A short blonde dancer with a fire engine streak in his bangs plopped on the floor. He smiled up at him and extended his hand. “Hi! I’m Kenjirou Minami. Everyone calls me Minami. Nice to meet you…?”

“Um, Yuuri Katsuki.” He weakly shook the boy's hand who looked like he couldn’t be older than twelve.

“Nice to meet you, Yuuri. Are you nervous? I’m so nervous I can’t stand it!” Minami sat down and swapped out his street shoes for his ballet shoes.

“Yeah. Pretty nervous.”

“And I have a big paper that my teacher just assigned yesterday, and it’s due on Monday! She wouldn’t give me an extension even though I told her about this audition.” He started moving through his stretches with his eyes still fixed on Yuuri, holding him in their conversation. “Teachers just don’t care about everything you have to do outside of school. They think that the rest of it is so unimportant compared to their stupid tests and assignments, but this is going to be like the rest of my life! I have to get in, or I’ll just die! Are your teachers like mine too or are mine just mean?”

“Um, I don’t really remember. It’s been awhile since I was in school.”

“Oh, really? I thought you were my age. How old are you?”

“Twenty-four,” he mumbled as he began to stretch his feet, placing the top of his toes on the floor and pressing down, feeling the burn spread from the top of his foot through the bottom of his shins.

“Wow, you’re so old!” Seeing Yuuri go pale, he backtracked. “I mean not like there’s anything wrong with that, I mean. It’s just, um, unusual.” He placed his leg on top of his duffle bag and slid into a deep oversplit- the kind Yuuri just couldn’t do anymore. He could get a little past that straight line but not nearly as much as he used to be able to.

“Room three! You’re up! Follow me!” A tall, slender woman with blonde hair piled on her head in a messy bun and dressed in a loose-fitting white tee over her full-body black leotard gestured toward one of the rooms down the hall.

He grabbed his duffle and slung it over his shoulder and followed her.

“Good luck, Yuuri!” Minami called out loudly making everyone’s heads turn toward them.

Yuuri blushed as he turned back. “Uh, yeah. Thanks. You too.”

 _Whatever it takes_  
_'Cause I love the adrenaline in my veins_  
_I do whatever it takes_  
_'Cause I love how it feels when I break the chains_  
_Whatever it takes_  
_You take me to the top I'm ready for_  
_Whatever it takes_  
_'Cause I love the adrenaline in my veins_  
_I do what it takes_

The woman turned into a room that had a large number three taped to the glass on the door. The room was a standard dance studio space. Lining two walls were floor to ceiling mirrors with the two lines of barres in front of them- the real one and the reflection. The light hardwood floors had seen better days, but they were at least nicely springy. The woman walked to the center of the room as the others crowded around the door unsure of what to do with themselves.

“Okay,” She clapped her hands to get the group’s attention. “Put your things along the wall to your right. I’m Regina, and I’ll be your adjudicator for this portion of the audition. We’ll begin with a basic class to see where your skills are at for the first hour. You’ll then be taught a two-minute portion of a routine, and in groups of four, you’ll perform it. We will follow that with a short section of lifts. To our boys, I apologize. As there are so few of you, I’ll need you each to perform each series of lifts six times to make up for the lack of partners. Will you all be able to manage that?”

“Yes, madam.” 

“Excellent. Thank you. I’ll give you five minutes to settle and finish stretching.”

Yuuri tucked himself into the far corner and placed his duffle bag down. He put his phone and headphones away in the front pocket then fished out his water bottle from the side mesh pocket. He popped the cap and took a quick swig. He glanced around the room as he capped it and put it back in his bag. There were nine girls and three boys, including himself. No one was chatting, game faces were on, and all were sizing up the competition.

“Warm-up is now over!” She picked up a clipboard from the table and came to the center of the floor. “Take your positions at the barre and let’s begin.” She waited for everyone to get into place. “And begin. Plie down two, three, and up, two three.”

Yuuri sighed and sank into the movements trying to use the familiar lines of his body to draw out his nerves. The instructor came over and pushed on his stomach reminding him to hold it firm.

“Keep that butt in. When you have a larger one, it’s even more important to hold it in.”

He nodded once through his blush and used his abs to pull up on his pelvis and tuck his butt in under himself. After years of Minako telling him to pop it out further, she hadn’t quite been able to correct him of that habit in the three weeks they had. He lifted his chin back up and noticed the girl in front of him in the mirror trying to hold back a snicker. Great. He’s going to go out on stage, and his ass alone is going to scream, “I’ve been paid to shake this thing in people’s faces.”

The instructor moved on to the girl who had been laughing and wiped it off her face with a sharp, “Shoulders down! No turtles in ballet!”

The rest of the class went as well as Yuuri could hope for. His lack of flexibility was noted through a few moves, and there were several more admonishments to keep his ass in with each one gaining more exasperation from the instructor. She finally released them for a five-minute break, and he went to take a grateful gulp of water. He considered texting Viktor as he would have had it been Minako telling him his ass was too big to make himself feel better, but his nerves couldn’t handle any more input even from his eternally sweet and loving boyfriend. Viktor would likely have his phone out though ready and waiting to respond to anything he sent, and that thought alone made him smile. He could see his response even without sending the text. ‘What?! Your ass is not too big! It’s perfect! I love your ass! I want to make love to your ass! Please? Tonight? You won’t be too tired, right? I’ll let you know in exquisite detail exactly how much I love your ass. Love you, Yuuri! You’re going to kill it!’ He smiled and shook his head at his ridiculous imagination that seemed way too possible and took another sip of water before tucking the bottle away again and reassembling with the other dancers at the edge of the floor.

The instructor clapped her hands with her clipboard tucked under her arm. “Alright. Let’s get to the choreography section! I’m going to call off your group number for the dance first and then I’ll begin the demonstration.” She glanced down at her clipboard. She read off the names and which group they were assigned to. “... Yuuri Katsuki, group one. Meghan Brown, group three...”

He inwardly cursed his shit luck when it came to getting picked for things. If it were a sporting team in high school, he would be last; for dance recitals, he’d be first on stage.

She finally finished her list and set down her clipboard and walked back to the center of the room stretching out her shoulders. “I’ll dance once slow with the counts, then at tempo with the counts and lastly at tempo no counts. You’ll be given fifteen minutes to work it out on your own or in your group of four. When your group is up you will perform the choreography together. I will give you the counts at tempo to start, but you’ll have to keep the count for the dance on your own.

“Five, six, seven, eight! Tombe-pas de bourrée, glissade.” She danced with clean precision even through the slowed counts as she called off the moves to the rhythm of the count. “Grand pas de chat, contretemps, and back!” She turned and headed back the way she came with the same moves repeated but up a new angle of line. “Two, three, four, grand pas de chat, contretemps, temps leve, graceful run, five, six, seven, eight, and first arabesque, fouette turns, four, five, six, seven, eight!” She whipped around the single point of her toes six times then landed with a light as air finish. She danced lines crossing the floor each time in a neat x. At least remembering his positions should be easy. None of the moves she ran through next were all that challenging, but from the way she danced, precision was what they were looking for. He had never been all that great with precision to begin with, and now after being free to dance wherever and however he wished, he was even worse at it.  “And step step into grand jete and finish grand fouette to attitude.” She closed out her dance then went back to repeat it again at full count and then again, just her moving without music or counts, but perfectly in rhythm and precisely where she’d danced it the first and second times. “Okay. In your groups, each dancer will have their own corner and will cross paths until the last sixteen counts where they will meet in the middle and form a straight line. Is everyone clear on that?”

“Yes, madam!” They all called out in stereo.

“Excellent. Your fifteen minutes begin now.”

And this is where the precision came in. It wasn’t just how well he did now. His whole group had to be on, or they were going to fail. He gathered with the others in his group, and they skipped the introductions in favor of getting where they needed to be. He did note however that the girl who had laughed at him and his huge ass was in his group. Of course. They claimed a corner of the room and ran through their dance with stilted motions to mark the moves in the tiny space. They wouldn’t even get a chance to do a full run-through before they had to perform it. The instructor was circling the room to observe how they worked together, and she paused at their group to watch them. That had to be the moment when he caught his hip on one of the girls as they passed the intersection of the x.

“Hey! Watch it!” And of course, it was the girl who had the nasty laugh whom he hit.

“I’m so sorry. Please forgive me.” He bowed his head slightly.

“Maybe if you could remember to keep that big ass of yours in you won’t smack into us.” She glared at him and went back to her corner so they could run through the dance from the start.

He bit his lip and moved back to his corner. “I’m so sorry again. I’ll try to be more careful next time.”

“Yeah, you better. I don’t need you messing this up for me. I’ve worked really hard to get here.”

“Yeah, we all have,” another girl in a red leotard snapped back. “Maybe you should spend less time talking and more time dancing. He already apologized twice. We’re just waiting on you now.”

Yuuri gave her a grateful smile which she returned.

The instructor moved on as they began another run-through to a group where a boy in a green shirt had chosen to stay out of his group and run through the moves on his own, trying to get the moves themselves perfected.

The end of their time was called, and Yuuri’s group made their way to the middle of the floor.

“Keep your big ass out of my way,” the girl with the brown hair and a nasty laugh hissed at him as she moved past to take her spot opposite of him.

He tried to put her out of his mind as the counts started. He stepped into the dance, leading with his toes. They managed to pull it off without any collisions though he had blanked out in the middle, so he had no idea if their performance was any good. He didn’t know if that was a good thing or a bad thing. At least he didn’t have to worry about every single one of his mistakes, but not having any idea if he failed or managed something decent was a thorn wedged in his mind.

“Alright. You’ll all stay in your same groups for the lift section with one change. Miss Jones, I’d like you to move to group three and Miss Brown, I’d like you to take her place in group one with Mr. Katsuki.”

The girl with brown hair and a nasty laugh looked a little puzzled but relieved as she moved to the group with the boy in the green shirt. Was she getting moved because of him? It had to be. It was the only change the instructor had made. The new girl came over and smiled warmly at them all.

“Alright. I’d like to demonstrate the lifts, but unfortunately, we have a shortage of males in our school at the moment as well, so I’ll-”

“Um… pardon me,” Yuuri found himself saying in a timid voice, “but if you’d like, you can use me to demonstrate them.”

“Are you sure? There’s going to be five moves, and you already have three partners to perform them with, and each one will be performed twice.”

“I’m sure. I’ll be fine.”

She smiled. “Okay, thank you very much for volunteering, Mr. Katsuki.”

They took their places in the center of the floor, and the other dancers cleared the space. “Okay, we’re going to begin with an arabesque with you in a lunge then up into a pirouette, twelve single whip turns, and finish into arabesque and a fish dive then I’ll dance away five steps and a catch from a jete into a pressage above the shoulders. I'll leave my hands on your shoulders, legs split. Then back to the ground and up into a single-handed torch. Got that?”

“Yes, madam.”

He took his position next to her and took her hand in his, firming up his arm and stabilizing it as he stretched down into a lunge. She lifted herself into an elegant arabesque, her free leg high above her head as she leaned on him to drop her chest low. She moved her free leg down, and he followed her cue to stand back up and circle her tiny waist in his hands as she spun en point. It took the first two rotations to figure out her balance and the right distance, so he didn’t get smacked in the face as she whipped around, but soon enough he corrected her initial wobble and held her steady through the turns, his hands giving a tiny push to keep her spinning freely before the next whip. She exited with her leg high, and he caught it by the thigh and dropped her toward the floor with his other hand around her waist, her body arching through his hands, stopping the dip just before she smacked into the wood. He lifted her back up and set her down to dance freely away, her arms dripping elegance over her nimble feet. She turned and charged at him without hesitation, and he fixed his eyes on her carefully to watch for the exact moment to move. He spotted her thrust from the floor and moved his arms up to catch her by the hips and press them above his shoulders with her split legs parallel to his own body then lowered her carefully to rest her en pointe as she brought her free leg back down. Lifting her back up to arch backward over his arm held strong through his line of balance, she gave all of her support to him, her arms stretched overhead and her foot drawn up to her opposite knee. He held her there long enough for the audience to admire her properly then set her back carefully en pointe.

She turned back to face him, beaming. “Thank you, Mr. Katsuki. That was wonderful. The girls who have drawn you as their partner are very lucky indeed.”  

He blushed and dipped his head. “Thank you, madam. I’m glad you enjoyed it.”

She turned back to the class. “Okay, I hope you all got that because I’m not making him repeat it. Does anyone have any issues performing any of the moves? I'd rather you tell me and avoid injuries than stupidly attempt something trying to impress us."

Everyone shook their heads quietly. 

"Excellent. I’ll give Mr. Katsuki here a bit of a rest, so we’ll begin with group two and come back to his group last.” Finally. Some luck.

He went back to grab his water again and joined the other dancers sitting on the floor and watching as the boy from group two led his ballerinas through their dances. He did okay through the first two, but by the third dancer, his arms were shaking hard, and their movements lost some grace as the holds were wisely clipped in favor of not dropping her. By her second pass, he was barely getting her up at all in the last two moves. He looked frustrated, and the ballerina looked to be near tears.

“Don’t worry, dears. You won’t be marked down for this. We understand physical limitations. Though, you really could work on your strength and endurance, Mr. Dorovsky.”

“Yes, madam. I apologize for underperforming.”

“You performed fine. It’s unfortunate that we are in such a shortage of male dancers. Okay, group three, you’re up.”

The guy in the green shirt and the girl with brown hair and a nasty laugh took their places to begin. They began well, but the catch was mistimed with the guy taking too long to finish his pose before looking to see where she was. He managed to catch her just enough to prevent any attempt to save herself. Yuuri cringed, and the dancer hit the floor.

The instructor rushed over to check if the girl was okay and helped her to her feet. She said something to the guy, and he responded with a shake of his head and picked up his bag and walked out the door. The instructor looked helplessly for a moment at the girls still waiting to go. She cringed as she spoke. “I truly hate to ask you gentlemen this, but would you be able to spit the group to cover for the gentleman who just left? He won’t be returning. As Mr. Katsuki already took on an extra dance, he’d get the one while Mr. Dorovsky would gain the two more.”

The other guy shook his head. “I’m sorry. I just can’t do it. I could barely finish the ones I already did.”

“I understand. We don’t need to risk any injuries here. I guess we’ll just have to-”

“I can take them,” Yuuri spoke up again with his quiet voice.

“Thank you, Mr. Katsuki, but I can’t allow that. You can’t perform that many times.”

“I can do it. I won’t drop them. I promise.”

She studied him with a hard gaze. “Thirteen pas de deuxs in a row. That’s too much. Maybe if we cut all of yours to just one run-through.”

“No, that wouldn’t be fair to the girls. It takes a little time to get used to a new partner. They need that second pass. I can do it. I promise.”

“Alright. I’ll let you try it, but if I see you tiring too much, we’ll just have to call it.”

“Yes, madam.”

“Alright. We’ll begin with the girls first assigned to Mr. Katsuki and then move on to the rest. Miss Brown, please step forward.”

The girl with the sweet smile joined him on the floor, and they began their dance. He had to admit that after about seven run-throughs he was getting a little tired despite the water breaks he was forced into taking between every girl. Some of them knew how to carry themselves well and didn’t feel like much at all, but others were less skilled, and it took a lot more strength to stabilize them. He finally faced the last girl and the one he’d been dreading. He would have liked to get her out of the way first, but he understood the logic of letting her recover from her fall. He shook out his arms and drank some more water then took his place and waited for her to join him.

 _Whatever it takes_  
_'Cause I love the adrenaline in my veins_  
_I do whatever it takes_  
_'Cause I love how it feels when I break the chains_  
_Whatever it takes_  
_You take me to the top I'm ready for_  
_Whatever it takes_  
_'Cause I love the adrenaline in my veins_  
_I do what it takes_

She gave him a wary look as she placed her hand in his and they moved into the first arabesque. She resisted giving him her weight, and her arabesque ended up shaky and lackluster. Her rotations through his hands felt like she was trying to shove him away as she whipped her arms and free leg around. He held himself back just a little more than he would have with someone who had more control. He picked her up for the fish dive and dropped her low, but not quite as far as he would have liked feeling her tense as she went down. She danced away and turned to face him, pausing before starting her glissades to build to the jete. Right as she was supposed to leap, she cut her steps off and lost her balance landing with a hard smack as her bony ass hit the floor.

He hesitated just a moment before offering his hand to help her to her feet. She tried to turn away from him, but he saw the watery red rimming her eyes. Looking down at her, the girl with a nasty laugh fell away and was replaced with a scared little girl, likely still in high school. He tugged her hand to turn her back to him and smiled at her. “It’s really hard to dance with someone when you don’t even know their first name. I’m Yuuri. It’s nice to meet you…”

“Olivia,” she muttered the name through clenched teeth.

“You’re a lovely dancer, Olivia. I’m certain you’ll do well here.”

She glared at him. “What are you talking about? I already messed it up.”

“Miss Jones, I need you to begin your second pass,” the instructor called out.

“Can I have just a little break first, madam?” Yuuri asked.

She nodded with a tight smile. “Okay, Mr. Katsuki. Five minutes.”

“Thank you, madam!” He beamed at her and turned back to Olivia. “There’s a reason why they give you a second try. Partnering is hard, and it takes so much trust, and that takes time to build. Two tries really aren’t enough at all, but let’s see what we can do in five minutes. How about you tell me three quick things about yourself, and I’ll tell you three about me.”

“Uh… okay. I guess. Um… I’ve been dancing for fourteen years-”

“No. Not your resume. Save that for them. Tell me what your favorite move is.”

The corner of her mouth twitched just a little. “I like pirouettes.”

“Oh? Why’s that?”

“I just look like a ballerina as I always pictured one when I was a little girl when I do them.”

“Ah,” he smiled and nodded, “that makes sense. You do have beautiful pirouettes, and they are such an iconic move. Tell me… where you most want to go when you’re on tour.”

Her eyes flickered between him and the instructor watching them closely. “Um. Tokyo. I really love J-pop, and the city seems so cool.” She glanced at him with just a tiny smile. “Are you Japanese?”

“I am.”

“Have you ever been to Tokyo?”

“No. My parents moved here before I was born. I’ve never left Detroit.”

“Never?” Her eyes widened.

“Nope. Not once. I guess that counts as my first thing, huh? Okay, last thing for you. Tell me your favorite cheat food.”

“Macaroni and cheese. The box kind, not the baked one.”

“Ah, excellent choice. I think you’ve more than earned a cheat meal today. Have the whole box when you get home.”

Her face gaped open. “The whole box?!”

“The whole thing. Falls hurt less when you’ve got at least a little cushion back there.” He grinned. “Take it from someone who knows.”

“What’s your cheat meal?”

“Katsudon. It’s a dish from Japan. It’s got rice and egg and fried pork and peas and onions and this really tasty sauce that coats everything and great. Now you’ve made me hungry. Thanks.”

She giggled. “Sorry.”

“Yeah, now my ass is going to get even bigger. That’s okay though. My boyfriend will be thrilled.”

“You have a boyfriend?”

“Yeah. He’s so hot. Oh my god. I got so lucky. Like really lucky. I was in love with him for six years before he noticed me.”

“Wow. That’s like, a really long time. How old are you?”

“Twenty-four.”

“Really? You look a lot younger.”

“Why, thank you.” He gave her his sweet smile. “That’s really music to my ears right now. I feel so old standing with all of you young punks. Okay, so I think that was thing number two about me. Number three is: I’ve done these lifts with my boyfriend.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. He always wanted to be a dancer, but he got stuck running a steel mill instead, so I’ve been teaching him. I used him to train my lifts since I had so little time to get them back. I thought that if I could lift him, I’d have no problem with you tiny girls. Plus, he loved it.” He grinned. “Really. He runs a steel mill, and he’s such a romantic sap. He just swooned every time I picked him up. Such a silly man.”

“How big is your boyfriend?”

“Big. He’s five foot eleven, and he works out a lot, so he has a lot of muscle. He’s bigger than me by quite a bit.”

“Wow. I didn’t even know people could lift someone bigger than themselves.”

“Sure. I bet I could teach you how. It’s all about balance and good technique. Hey, maybe I can teach you, and you can lift my big butt.”

She laughed loudly and quickly covered her mouth.

“Alright, your five minutes are up.” The instructor gave him a small smile.

“Yes, madam. May I please have one more minute? I’m still a little tired.”

She held back a smile as she nodded once.

“Thank you, madam!” He turned back to Olivia. “Okay, last thing. Tell me why you’re afraid of me.”

“Well, you already did this a lot, so you’re tired, and I don’t really like lifts to begin with, and that other guy dropped me, and you probably hate me.”

He nodded and leaned in to speak a little softer. “I’m not really tired. I just lied to the instructor. I have pretty good stamina, and my mistress is the literal devil. This is nothing compared to what she makes me do. And you weigh nothing compared to Viktor. I could lift you all day long. I’m not that other guy. He was more concerned about looking good than he was about paying attention to you. That’s a terrible dance partner, and I’m not a terrible dance partner. I have a bunch of references lining the walls there. I didn’t drop any of them, and I won’t drop you. And lastly, why would I hate you? We’re friends, right?” He gave her the warmest smile he was capable of.

“Minute’s up!”

“Yes, madam. I’m ready. Are you, Olivia?”

She smiled. “Yes. I’m ready.”

He offered her his hand and led her to the center of the room. This time through there was no hesitation in her movements, and her body melded into each movement in his hands like heated metal. When he set her back down en pointe, the smile she beamed up at him was dazzling.

“Thank you for making me look good.” She whispered to him as they walked back to the wall.

“No, that was all you, Olivia. I’m just a glorified chair.” He winked at her and could’ve sworn he saw a bit of pink dust her cheeks.

The instructor clapped again to rein in the chatter that had begun to fill the room now that the tension of the class had eased. “All right ladies and gentlemen, your time with me is done, and you are now to head back to the lobby to wait to be called for your improv. Also stay warm and hydrated; you’ll thank me later. Off with you! Break a leg!”

 _Always had a fear of being typical_  
_Looking at my body feeling miserable_  
_Always hanging on to the visual_  
_I wanna be invisible_  
_Looking at my years like a martyrdom_  
_Everybody needs to be a part of 'em_  
_Never be enough, I'm the prodigal son_  
_I was born to run, I was born for this_

Back in the lobby, a shiver ran down Yuuri’s spine. Even though it was sufficiently heated against the cold beyond the walls, his body was cooling from all the dancing he’d already done. He grabbed his nearly empty water bottle and headed over to the water fountain to refill it. After he capped it, he leaned down to take a few drinks of the fresh cool water. He put his hand in the flow and ran what he’d caught through his sweaty hair to slick it off his face.

The bored brunette that had checked them in came out with a clipboard. “Room two. Dancers who were in room two, follow me.” He turned and disappeared through the door followed by twelve amped up dancers.

Yuuri fished out his headphones and his phone. Not looking at the notifications that had come through during his class session, he cued up his warm-up mix and began to stretch his body to keep it limber. He made this mind focus on his breath, and the movement of his body, trying to keep the swirl from taking hold.

He was startled out of his solitude when Olivia touched his shoulder. “Yuuri, our group was just called. Come on.”

“Oh, thanks. I seemed to have zoned out there.” He pulled his buds out of his ears and grabbed his bag to follow.

“Yeah, I saw that. Are you scared about the improv?”

“Hell yeah, aren’t you?”

“Totally petrified!” She laughed nervously, and Yuuri saw that all of the meanness had been a shield, that this jittery but kind girl was who Olivia really was. He smiled to himself. Human, just like him.

The were lead through the wings of a large stage and told by the brunette to leave their things along the back wall and to line up along the taped line at the front of the stage. “Make sure your number is clearly displayed.” With this last instruction, he left the way he’d come.

Yuuri put his duffle down where he’d been told and took his place in line next to Olivia on the end. The stage lights were on full, obscuring mostly whoever was out in the audience watching them. He bounced on his toes as he waited for them to begin.

A woman with dark skin and long braids down her back wearing a red crop top and flowing white pants took center stage. “Alright, ladies and gentlemen. Welcome to the improv portion of your audition.” She opened her arms wide. “We’ll begin with a thirty-minute instruction in the basics of the chosen dance style, and then you will have fifteen minutes to work out a two-minute choreography which will be performed in the order in which we draw your number.” Great. More number draws for him to get the worst slot for. “You will all be performing to the same song, and the style of dance you will be performing is…” She paused sadistically because apparently torturing applicants was an amusing game according to her grin. “Belly dance!”

The group erupted in a series of groans, but Yuuri had to hold back a smile. He’d actually studied this one along with pole dancing. Minako had wanted him to get in touch with his hips and add passion to his movements.

Oliva glanced over at him with her face sickened with horror. “Oh god. You don’t look upset. Don’t tell me you can do this one.”

“Just watch me closely when we have our fifteen minutes.” He gave his hips a little shake and winked at her.

“I will. I’m totally going to rip off whatever I can from you. I hope you don’t mind.”

“Not at all. They’ve got more than one spot. It’d be nice to have a friend already there if we both make it in.” He smiled at her as the instructor went to put on the music.

“You’re really sweet. Sorry I was a bitch to you,” she quickly whispered as the song “Hips Don’t Lie” came on low in the background and the instructor took her place to begin the class.

He gave her a quick smile then turned his attention to the class. His relief at knowing the dance they had to do washed away as he remembered he’d have to work out a choreography with an audience and do his first run through while being judged. Thank god he’d already allowed Viktor in to touch this part of him first. He didn’t think he would have been able to do it at all if it weren’t for that. Still, Viktor was sweet and understanding and loved him unconditionally. These people were here to judge him, and he had no protection between them and his soul.

His anxiety bubbled to the surface as he moved through the simple hip circles and figure eights they warmed up with. He turned to the side and lifted his heel and held his pelvis under him with a firm stomach as he clenched the muscles above his hip to raise it up then let them go to let his hip drop with gravity alone. The move shook through his ass as it snapped against the limits of his muscles. They turned to the other side after a few drops, and he saw Olivia looking back over her shoulder to watch him with great concentration on her face. She was mostly watching his hip to try to figure out how he moved it, but occasionally her eyes would flick up to meet his with her expression wrinkling even further. Every minute that passed made his anxiety spike higher and the moves weren’t challenging enough to give him the focus he needed to hold his anxiety at bay. The world was beginning to blur at the edges as the instructor released them to work out the choreography.

“Hey, Yuuri. Are you okay?” Olivia whispered.

“Uh, yeah. No. Not so much,” his voice trembled making his statement painfully obvious. “I kinda have anxiety and stage fright, and it’s kinda bad right now, but I’ll be okay.” He smiled. “Don’t worry about me.”

She nodded with a surprising amount of understanding on her face. “Would it help if we pretend like we’re just performing for each other?”

He smiled and nodded. “Yeah. I think it would.”

She gave him a beaming smile. “Then just watch me, and I’ll watch you, and then we’ll both make it in, and we’ll go to Tokyo together when we’re on tour for the Met.”

His smile widened. “Yeah. We can meet my best friend there who’s currently touring the world as a figure skater, and he can show us his home city in Bangkok afterward. He’s really sweet, so I’m sure you’ll like him.” He started moving to the song, his hips shaking the nerves out of his body.

She laughed and watched closely as he strung together the moves she’d been taught and tried to replicate them with her own twist. “If you say he’s sweet, he must be the sweetest person in the world.”

“He is.” Yuuri nodded sincerely. “You might think you’re joking, but he is the nicest person I’ve ever met. He’s always smiling. I’m a bear out of hibernation next to him.”

They stopped talking to focus on their tasks and while his anxiety was still there, it had dropped to a manageable level for now at least. He kept swaying to the beat to keep his body limber as their fifteen minutes ended, and they called out numbers of the performers to go. His luck kept getting better and better with every number drawn that was not his, and he could mentally run through the choreography, building just a little bit more safety. Some of the dancers managed decent performances, but a lot looked like they had no idea how to move their bodies that way at all. They could work their arms just fine though with an obvious ballet floatiness, but the challenge of letting their hips sway and rock was their downfall. It was the perfect challenge for a dancer trained to hold everything tight as the firm tension supporting the core was still required, but they also had to be able to relax an isolated muscle entirely without losing the rest. It was the ultimate test of body control.

Olivia went near the end and managed to do a rather surprising routine with some of her rolling moves clearly drawn from what Yuuri had done but reordered and worked into her own lithe frame. She came back with a questioning grin to which he nodded and offered a high five.

She struck his hand then grabbed him into a hug. “Thanks. Make sure you kill it. I’ll be cheering for you. Silently. Don't wanna get in trouble.” She pulled back, and they grinned at each other as she retook her spot next to him.

The other guy in the group went next looking like he wasn’t even aware his body came with the hip feature installed. They were a means of connecting his upper body to his legs, and that was it. He did a decent job of masking the insufficiency through arm and leg movements, but it wasn’t anything you could call belly dancing. With Yuuri’s luck holding out until the end, he managed to draw last and took the stage facing Olivia with his back to the three judges, one of them being Liliya Baranovskaya herself. Olivia gave him a huge smile and two thumbs up. He pulled his shirt off over his head and tossed it to her. She caught it with a shocked smile as the rest of the group started up a whispering clatter amongst themselves as he folded the top of his tights down to hit right above the curve of his ass.

He took a breath and felt for the music, pretending that this was a performance he had perfected over thousands of repetitions. It wasn’t entirely a lie. His body had moved like this thousands of times. Maybe not in this order, but what does an order matter anyway for dance? As long as he could feel it, he could move.

 _I know I am on tonight_  
_My hips don't lie and I am starting to feel it's right_  
_All the attraction, the tension_  
_Don't you see baby, this is perfection_  
_Oh boy, I can see your body moving_  
_Half animal, half man_  
_I don't, don't really know what I'm doing_  
_But you seem to have a plan_  
_My will and self restraint_  
_Have come to fail now, fail now_  
_See, I am doing what I can, but I can't so you know_  
_That's a bit too hard to explain_

_\- Hips Don't Lie by Shakira feat. Wyclef Jean_

His outstretched arms rolled into the music, sending the beat flowing down them like a snake draped over his shoulders, flicking his wrists at the beat. His hips began to rock, lifting up and trilling at the top to drop down into a sway back around to the other side. He found a beat to step forward, landing with a pop on his heel and rippled the motion through him as he pivoted to the side and looked over his shoulder with a coy smile at his judges’ stunned faces.

He stretched his arms up overhead then let them waterfall down his body with his hips picking up a steady fluttering twist up and dropping hard to the beat. Working in just a touch of hip-hop with some pops and holds to hit the rhythm in between sinuous, twisting waves of his hips, rolled the motion through his rippling muscles, each one contracted and released on his call. His arms rode the beat down where a kick of his hips tossed them back up, and he stepped around the floor, landing on his heel and dragging his pulsing body to its new spot. He brought the beat in to dance it between his hips hitting the down beat and through a twist in his torso for his shoulders to hit the up beat. Dropping down, he worked the beat lower until one knee hit the floor and he finished with his hands on his thighs and a playful skew to both his body and his smile.

He stood back up and took a little bow to the judges then to his cheering audience behind him.

Olivia tossed his shirt at him as he walked back. “Teach me, senpai!” Her eyes were wide with delight. “That was amazing! Please say you’ll teach me how to dance like that.”

Laughing, Yuuri accepted her offered hug. “You’ve got it, kid.”

She scoffed. “I’m not a kid! I’m eighteen and fully an adult.”

He laughed. “Right. You’ve been an adult now for how long?”

“Three weeks,” she muttered.

“Alright, children, listen up.” The instructor waved her hands to regain their attention. “You have an hour break for lunch, and then be back in the hallway to wait for your individual numbers to be called for your interview and prepared dance portion. I highly recommend that you eat lightly and are thoroughly warmed back up by the end of the hour in case yours is the first number called. Do not be late. If your number is called and you are not here, that is an automatic disqualification. Dismissed!” She clapped her hands again, and the applicants all gathered their stuff to move out.

“Do you want to get lunch together?” Olivia slung her bag over her shoulder and pulled her street shoes out of it.

Left to his own devices, he would have used this time to retreat from everyone and let his anxiety run out full course to hopefully be out of his system before he danced, but the quiver in her smile that begged him not to leave her alone with her nerves pulled him out of himself. “Sure. Sounds great. I’ll let you pick the place because me and my huge ass would pick a cheeseburger and fries.” He grabbed his bag, and they left the room. He spotted that kid with the funky hair from earlier looking a bit sick leaning against the wall. “Hold up, one second, Olivia.” He walked over to him and gave him a smile. “Hey, Minami, right?”

He looked up and brightened upon seeing him. “You remembered me! That’s so awesome!”

“Wanna join me and Olivia for lunch?” He gestured to where she was waiting.

“Yeah! Thanks, Yuuri. That sounds really great right now. I can’t do lifts and did you have to belly dance too? That’s just mean. We’re guys!” He grabbed his bag and trotted after them.

Olivia laughed. “Yuuri can belly dance better than any female I’ve ever seen.”

“What?!” Minami shrieked making both of them cringe and laugh. “Show me!”

Yuuri laughed and popped and twisted his hips as they walked down the hall to the soundtrack of Olivia’s laugh and Minami’s squealing glee. 

 _Hypocritical, egotistical_  
_Don't wanna be the parenthetical, hypothetical_  
_Working_ onto _something that I'm proud of, out of the box_  
_An epoxy to the world and the vision we've lost_  
_I'm an apostrophe_  
_I'm just a symbol to remind you that there's more to see_  
_I'm just a product of the system, a catastrophe_  
_And yet a masterpiece, and yet I'm half-diseased_  
_And when I am deceased_  
_At least I go down to the grave and die happily_  
_Leave the body and my soul to be a part of thee_  
_I do what it takes_

_\- Whatever It Takes by Imagine Dragons_

“Mr. Katsuki! I’m going to need you to answer the question!” Liliya Baranovskaya’s sharp voice cracked through the blinding stage lights that his deafening heart and silent mind were trapped in.

“Uuuh… I’m sorry, can you repeat the question?”

“I asked you, Mr. Katsuki,” she emphasized each word as though every one cost her a thousand dollars to repeat, “to elaborate on what kind of performances you were doing these past six years.”

“Uuuhh… I- I’m a…” Whatever confidence he had with Viktor and had found again with Olivia both needing his support and encouraging him herself vanished as he tried to find the words that their harsh stares were waiting to tear apart and use against him and his dream any way they could. But better them tear his dream from him than his own cowardice. He steeled his body and lifted his chin. “I’m a burlesque dancer. I have a show every Friday night at a local bar. The routines change every week, and I choose the music and choreograph each one myself. It’s been very successful. I hold the record for the most customers brought in during a set which I’ve held since a few months after I started.”

They jotted some notes down then nodded at each other when they were done and looked up with stern faces which looked slightly distorted through the foggy stage lights. “What is your inspiration for dance?”

“Uh, when I was a kid, I just danced because, um, well because I didn’t know anything but dance. It was just something I did. Later I shared a dream with my best friend who is a figure skater to use our talents to tour the world and share our little bit of Detroit with it as well. But…  Um, but that dream died. I kept dancing though just, um, just because I love to dance, so I guess my inspiration was myself then and then now... Now my boyfriend. Um he wanted to see me dance on a bigger stage, and he helped me find that dream again, and so now I dance for him too, and I’m trying for my dream again to show him that uh, how much his love means to me and what it’s meant for my life.”

Liliya tapped at the page in front of her with the pen with an irritated click. “Why did you give up your dream?”

“What?” His voice broke with a sledgehammer of emotions hitting on top of his anxiety. Tears sprang to his eyes.

“I said, Mr. Katsuki, why did you give up your dream?” Her voice stretched as tight as the bun in her hair.

Viktor hadn’t asked this. Not once. He didn’t even think to ask it. He stared down the train again feeling it so close he could feel the rivets tearing over his skin. Terror and pain gripped his chest, and his tears kept welling up higher the more he tried to force them down. “Uh…” He blinked fiercely trying to hold on to whatever part of himself he had left that wasn’t gripped into a panic. “My- my parents died.”

“I can’t hear you, Mr. Katsuki. You need to speak up.”

“My parents died!” His tears spilled over as he shouted, his panic turning to anger at her for forcing him to reveal things to strangers he didn’t want to reveal and at the universe for putting them there to begin with. “My parents died when I was in high school, and I had to go to work instead of dance because we couldn’t afford to have me off chasing stupid dreams when we could barely survive! I couldn’t ask them to do even more, so I gave it up! And I kept hoping that one day I could go after it, but I got stuck, and I kept waiting for the storm to end, and it just wouldn’t! Every time I would think that maybe now was the time something would always come along and set us back again. A pipe would break at the bar. Customers would lose their jobs and stop coming in. My sister needed to have her appendix removed. Something. Always something waiting to strike, and it just wouldn’t end!”

“Has the storm passed now?”

“No, it hasn’t! It won’t ever end because there’s one inside me too that’s always there, always striking.”

“So, why now, Mr. Katsuki?”

“Because this is it! This is my very last chance, and I’m sick of dancing in one tiny place. I’m sick of just waiting for the storm to end when I know it never really will.” His tears flung off the edges of his face as he shook his head. 

She rested her pen against her chin. “You think you can dance through the storm?” 

“Watch me.”

The corner of her mouth pulled just a bit to the side. “You may proceed with your dance.”

“Thank you for your time and attention.” He bowed and warmed the steel in his body back into something pliable he could work with as he wiped the tears from his face.

He went to center stage to take his starting position. They’d been instructed to build in an eight-count intro into their song selection, just enough time to get into place and mentally prepare. He crossed his feet and crouched down, bowing his head and crossing his arms before him. He counted the beats in his head and heard the first cords of the synthesizer that signaled the opening of the song.  

 _First when there's nothing_  
_But a slow glowing dream_  
_That your fear seems to hide_  
_Deep inside your mind_

He rolled up slowly, one vertebra at a time. When he’d straightened up to his full height, he turned bringing his arms above his head. Lowering his arms slowly, his gaze fixed before him seeing the tiny bathroom where he’d danced for his family to keep his fear of the storm away. Stopping when his arms were parallel to his shoulders, he swung into a turn on his toes, whipping himself around in place as he slowly brought his arms in and crossed them across his chest, squeezing tight to hold on through the storms that raged in his mind.

 _All alone I have cried_  
_Silent tears full of pride_  
_In a world made of steel_  
_Made of stone_

Stopping the spin with his arms back out, he leaped into the air, arms raised again, kicking his left leg behind him and landing gracefully on the ball of his right foot. His dance freed himself through a series of turns and leaps stretching the limits of his body and his control, building to an explosive turning leap over the center of the stage, his arms stretched out to the sides and his legs tucked in for maximum height. He dropped to the floor like a puppet when it strings are cut- when his life had been turned upside down; when his parents had died; when he had been forced to give up his dream and work at Viktor’s shop- and landed on feet that gave out into a lunge as he curled in on himself.

 _Well, I hear the music_  
_Close my eyes, feel the rhythm_  
_Wrap around_  
_Take a hold of my heart_

He grabbed the back of his head, pulsing to the beat of the drums in a battle to stand once again before he stretched himself flat on the stage, giving up the fight in the months when he thought he’d never dance again. With the strength of his back alone, his arms held back behind him, he rose up onto his feet once again and up into the arabesque Minako had drilled to perfection into every fiber of his being. His leg stretched higher than ever as he arched back. His floating arm drifted down, and his leg came around slowly at first then he whipped himself around and into the frenzy he found on stage at Yutopia. He reveled in the freedom to move his body without rules or limits, letting his driving passion for this single thing left in his life that still made him feel alive take control. He cast a challenging look to his audience of judges, daring them to judge this part of himself as anything other than what it was to him- his love. Passion, dreams, hope, salvation, tenderness, romance, every word he could use to say, "love," it was this. 

A flash of silver that he never failed to notice drew his attention past their nodding heads holding impressed expressions as they confirmed their opinions with each other to the back of the room. He beamed at the sight of Viktor with leashes in hand and their two balls of fluff wagging their tails, pink tongues lolling out to the sides, as they sat obedient to Viktor’s command for once. Viktor put his finger to his lips to shush his expression into keeping their secret then beamed right back and winked. Yuuri turned back to finish his dance, and his body obeyed without a trace of hesitation.

 _What a feeling_  
_Bein's believin'_  
_I can have it all_  
_Now I'm dancing for my life_  
_Take your passion_  
_And make it happen_  
_Pictures come alive_  
_You can dance right through your life_

_\- What a feeling by Irene Cara_


End file.
